Never had a relationship Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 10 years ago
#1
Keep anonymous because I dont know if any of my mates use this site.
Im 17 years old, still a virgin, never had a girlfriend, never kissed a girl. Its not like im a loser with no friends, its just I tend to bury myself in work and not really hang out with my mates much outside school. Im just a little awkward around other people sometimes, but I do have a group of friends, some of them im pretty close with.
I just never seem to meet girls, and the few girls I do meet either Im not interested in or they're not interested in me. I told myself after exams I would sort all this out this summer, but I've ended up spending almost every day on work experience, personal statements and essays. I dont feel like I need a girlfriend to validate myself, I just really want that intimacy and romance. Really Im a big softy Can anyone give me advice about my situation?
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JustJam2006
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#2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Keep anonymous because I dont know if any of my mates use this site.
Im 17 years old, still a virgin, never had a girlfriend, never kissed a girl. Its not like im a loser with no friends, its just I tend to bury myself in work and not really hang out with my mates much outside school. Im just a little awkward around other people sometimes, but I do have a group of friends, some of them im pretty close with.
I just never seem to meet girls, and the few girls I do meet either Im not interested in or they're not interested in me. I told myself after exams I would sort all this out this summer, but I've ended up spending almost every day on work experience, personal statements and essays. I dont feel like I need a girlfriend to validate myself, I just really want that intimacy and romance. Really Im a big softy Can anyone give me advice about my situation?
Aww OP, you're still pretty young. I never went on a date till I was 21! (that's probably saying a lot isn't it? :p: ) I don't think I'm hideous, or unapproachable. Maybe it's just I haven't socialised as much as others so I've never had the opportunity to meet many people. I reckon once you go to university (if you are planning to go), you'll be telling a very different story! It's just that you probably need to put yourself out there when you can. You sound like a nice guy so I'm sure you won't have many problems.

Everyone likes a little snuggle time sometimes (including myself)
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Blue Rose
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#3
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There's nothing you can do really but wait. You can't exactly go looking for a girlfriend. You can put yourself in more social situations though to meet more people.

I'm glad you don't feel you need a girlfriend to validate yourself.

You sound...interesting.

I don't know what advice to give you because it just happens it's more of a waiting game than anything else but like I said try and meet more people.
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JustJam2006
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#4
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(Original post by Blue Rose)
There's nothing you can do really but wait. You can't exactly go looking for a girlfriend. You can put yoursle fin more social situations though to meet more people.

I'm glad you don't feel you need a girlfriend to validate yourself.

You sound...interesting.

I don't know what advice to give you because it just happens it's more of a waiting game than anything else but like I said try and meet more people.
Exactly! (@ the bit in bold). Good post
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Blue Rose
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(Original post by JustJam2006)
Aww OP, you're still pretty young. I never went on a date till I was 21! (that's probably saying a lot isn't it? :p: ) I don't think I'm hideous, or unapproachable. Maybe it's just I haven't socialised as much as others so I've never had the opportunity to meet many people. I reckon once you go to university (if you are planning to go), you'll be telling a very different story! It's just that you probably need to put yourself out there when you can. You sound like a nice guy so I'm sure you won't have many problems.

Everyone likes a little snuggle time sometimes (including myself)
I think 21 is an alright age, you're more mature and it just seems like an alright time for dating.
I'm glad to hear about someone dating for the first time at 21, everyone else is in such a rush like there's no tomorrow and thinking that they have to do everything before they are 16 or something. People need to calm down.
And people can survive single and it is allowed. So many people go on about having not kissed someone or being a virgin at 19 or something like it's a crime. And too many people are just trying to fit in rather than being themselves.
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Sifr
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#6
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Keep anonymous because I dont know if any of my mates use this site.
Im 17 years old, still a virgin, never had a girlfriend, never kissed a girl. Its not like im a loser with no friends, its just I tend to bury myself in work and not really hang out with my mates much outside school. Im just a little awkward around other people sometimes, but I do have a group of friends, some of them im pretty close with.
I just never seem to meet girls, and the few girls I do meet either Im not interested in or they're not interested in me. I told myself after exams I would sort all this out this summer, but I've ended up spending almost every day on work experience, personal statements and essays. I dont feel like I need a girlfriend to validate myself, I just really want that intimacy and romance. Really Im a big softy Can anyone give me advice about my situation?

17 is still really young you know.
Theres no need to feel like an outsider..I think there are loads of people like you.
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JustJam2006
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#7
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(Original post by Blue Rose)
I think 21 is an alright age, you're more mature and it just seems like an alright time for dating.
I'm glad to hear about someone dating for the first time at 21, everyone else is in such a rush like there's no tomorrow and thinking that they have to do everything before they are 16 or something. People need to calm down.
HAHAHAHH!! I like that. Yes people do need to calm down :p: It's difficult to meet people being out of school and university though because there you can get to know people over a long period of time and because you're going through similar experiences together, it's easy to get along. I guess I'll just have to wait and see.
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theredwindmill
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#8
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Awww OP you sound so sweet :p:. Don't worry your only 17 so theres no rush really i know people who are 17 and have never had a relationship so there are lots of people like you
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Blue Rose
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#9
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And I think some people have the idea that when you get to a certain age you must start dating and having sex and whatever else. I think some people have the wrong idea that it's the 'grown up' thing to do. The same as drinking or smoking etc. People should just do what feels right for them rather than trying to be like everyone else and thinking that these things are expected of them. Single adults exist too.
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3105
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#10
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Im 17 years old, still a virgin, never had a girlfriend, never kissed a girl.
At your advanced age of 17 you may as well just give up now. :rolleyes:
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Cupid Stunt
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#11
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Do you friends go to or have parties often? It's a great place to meet girls, people think parties are just about being drunk and getting with a randomer, but you can pick up some good friends there, whilst it may not be a girl to date, you might find a real decent friend who's a girl, always nice to have a good friend of the opposite sex.

You meet a lot of people at a workplace too, same with clubs/pubs concerts, just get out and enjoy yourself, you'll meet someone soon enough, if not I'm sure the amount of socialising you'll be doing will keep you satisfied for a while.
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JustJam2006
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#12
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(Original post by Blue Rose)
And I think some people have the idea that when you get to a certain age you must start dating and having sex and whatever else. I think some people have the wrong idea that it's the 'grown up' thing to do. The same as drinking or smoking etc. People should just do what feels right for them rather than trying to be like everyone else and thinking that these things are expected of them. Single adults exist too.
So much sense spoken here, I could hug you! :p: I dont buy peer pressure. I've never felt like I've had to do certain things to fit in. Maybe that's why I haven't dated anyone till 21. When my friends were getting all made up and trying to attract boys, I was more interested in my education and just enjoying myself.

HAH! It's single adults galore out there...

OP you'll meet someone you click with when you least expect it. You're still young! Just enjoy being young and single...plenty of time to settle down later
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clozet
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#13
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Hey OP...I'm in exactly the same situation as you...except im a girl:p:
we should get together sometime:p:
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*River
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#14
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I know it's frustrating to hear this, but it will happen eventually when you're least expecting it. University is a big change, and a chance for you to meet lots of new people (and it's possible to do this without going out and getting wasted every night). You're only 17, it's not as if you're over the hill yet!
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Tyrannosaurus Cal
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#15
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I'm not so different and I'm 19... I'm just hoping that when the time is right, and with the right person, it'll work!

It's good that you don't want a girlfriend to validate yourself, and I do understand that sometimes a guy just wants some nice company Give it time, fingers crossed it'll happen for us both!:p:
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Anonymous #1
#16
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#16
wow thanks guys i didnt expect to get so many replies so quickly. I guess it is a bit reassuring that Im not the only one, sometimes it can feel like I am. A lot of my mates know I havnt ever kissed anyone before, and they never really give me trouble about it, so I dont think the way I feel is down to peer pressure. Im mostly fine with being a virgin, a lot of my friends are too, and I think Id only want my first time to be with someone special any way. Meeting girls doesnt seem too hard, thing is I just never seem to find that someone special, someone who Im attracted to and they're attracted to. I know you guys are saying wait till it happens, its just, is there no way to put myself out there a bit more? I just really, really want a cuddle
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Anonymous #2
#17
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#17
im 16....same position...except im female

im sociable and go out loads....just never seem to attract the guys......except for in a friendly way..........i think its because even though i appear to have confidence, i hate my body and cant see why anybody would like it.
ive had guys liek me before, but ive let them go thinking their joking, or just because i dont want to be in a realationship
but truely i do, i want to have a boyfriend, someone to like me more than just a friend!

maybe we should get together :P

x
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charlie23
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#18
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#18
pretty much the same, and i'm 20
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Anonymous #1
#19
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#19
(Original post by Anonymous)
im 16....same position...except im female

im sociable and go out loads....just never seem to attract the guys......except for in a friendly way..........i think its because even though i appear to have confidence, i hate my body and cant see why anybody would like it.
ive had guys liek me before, but ive let them go thinking their joking, or just because i dont want to be in a realationship
but truely i do, i want to have a boyfriend, someone to like me more than just a friend!

maybe we should get together :P

x
Problem is, Im just not as outgoing as u sound, I dont go out loads, I have a few friends but recently im starting to feel like our friendships are superficial, like im just a fifth wheel, cos I never really seem to hang out with them, and a lot of the time never really seem to get invited out with them, it kinda hurts. But I think for you, its just about accepting urself. You seem to have opportunities, you seem to want to take them, but I think ur insecurities could be holding u back. All the same, we shud definitely get together. Friday night, my place?
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Erradhadh
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#20
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(Original post by 3105)
At your advanced age of 17 you may as well just give up now. :rolleyes:
He really ought to have given up around the end of primary school - I mean if he hadn't gotten any by then, well, the future doesn't look too be bright.
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