Advice needed - boy situation Watch

PointeShoes-x
Badges: 14
Rep:
?
#1
Report Thread starter 10 years ago
#1
Well, I'm new. Hi! :hello:
Well anyway, I have a slight problem...
I met this guy about a year ago on a maths course. Long story short, I found out that he basically really likes me, but we didn't really have any contact with each other for a long time after that. Then, I danced with him at my prom a couple of weeks ago. We exchanged numbers and met up a few days ago.
I've found out from my friend that he apparently still fancies me and is planning on asking me out. Now the problem is that I just really don't like him in that way at all. I do want to be friends with him, but I don't fancy him. Now, as stupid as this sounds, I won't have a clue what to say if he does ask me out. I'm not a particularly confident person, and I'd just feel terrible, as I'd know how I'd feel in that situation. So, any advice on what to say if he does ask me? Or possibly anything I can do to hint to him that I'm not interested so he doesn't ask?
Sorry that this is really pathetic. now that I've written it down I realise how stupid I sound. I've just never been in a situation like this at all and I don't really know what to think.

Thanks!
0
reply
rachxl
Badges: 11
Rep:
?
#2
Report 10 years ago
#2
hey there welcome!

just try to keep calm if he asks you out... maybe plan out the kind of thing you would say in response beforehand if you feel it's coming, so that you will be well prepared for the moment.
0
reply
Cherryy
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#3
Report 10 years ago
#3
Tell him u like him as a friend but dont want a relationship with him. that should do it.
0
reply
DoMakeSayThink
Badges: 2
Rep:
?
#4
Report 10 years ago
#4
I think a good starting point would be "no". If you're going for the tactful angle, then you might want to precede that with something along the lines of "I'm really sorry, I like you a lot, but just not in that way". To be honest, it's going to be pretty confidence-killing for him regardless of what you do / say. Don't feel bad about it, though. It's not your fault, and if he's set on going for it then it's going to happen at some point.
0
reply
billyboymccoy
Badges: 1
Rep:
?
#5
Report 10 years ago
#5
Pity sex. It'll solve everything.
0
reply
cadaeibfeceh
Badges: 14
Rep:
?
#6
Report 10 years ago
#6
If you want to let him down softly you could say you do like him but have your eye on someone else, so under different circumstances might say yes but no atm...
0
reply
PointeShoes-x
Badges: 14
Rep:
?
#7
Report Thread starter 10 years ago
#7
OK, thanks for the advice, guys.
It seems so obvious what to do now that people have said it - I think I was just in a bit of a panic!
I think I'll just say that I don't see him in that way but would like to stay friends. The worst thing would be the awkwardness that followed...
Any ways I can subtly show him that I'm not really interested to avoid the situation?
0
reply
ArchedEdge
Badges: 15
Rep:
?
#8
Report 10 years ago
#8
(Original post by cadaeibfeceh)
If you want to let him down softly you could say you do like him but have your eye on someone else, so under different circumstances might say yes but no atm...
Bad idea.

Might give the guy hope that she will go out with him eventually.

Just let him down nicely and tell him no, and make it clear you don't want anything more than friendship.
0
reply
thanette
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#9
Report 10 years ago
#9
Ways to show non-interest:

-mention a date you are going on/boy casually to him or other peeps in his presence
-don't make too much of an effortwith his appearance
-keep any texts casual, not too enthusiastic/kisses etc
0
reply
DoMakeSayThink
Badges: 2
Rep:
?
#10
Report 10 years ago
#10
(Original post by ArchedEdge)
Bad idea.

Might give the guy hope that she will go out with him eventually.

Just let him down nicely and tell him no, and make it clear you don't want anything more than friendship.
Agreed.
0
reply
mushoo
Badges: 1
Rep:
?
#11
Report 10 years ago
#11
could always try to give off the friend vibes?? you know those you always see in the movies, like 'oh your my best friend' type stuff. try tht, so dont get to close, dont flirt and talk about other guys with him, ask advice, show tht your interested in somebody else by talkin about them alot!!
0
reply
DannyBoy123
Badges: 15
Rep:
?
#12
Report 10 years ago
#12
(Original post by thanette)
Ways to show non-interest:

-mention a date you are going on/boy casually to him or other peeps in his presence
-don't make too much of an effortwith his appearance
-keep any texts casual, not too enthusiastic/kisses etc
Bad idea, plenty of blokes (me included) would take this as the girl playing hard to get and therefore conclude that they were into them. As crushing as it will be for him, just tell him you really like him as a friend etc. etc. and maybe say you'll set him up with one of your mates to soften the blow slightly?! Just an idea.
0
reply
Cupid Stunt
Badges: 14
Rep:
?
#13
Report 10 years ago
#13
Nah, you don't sound stupid, happens to plenty of people, I think the easiest way is to just be honest with him , you'd rather be good friends with him instead of date each other. Most people will understand that...
0
reply
cadaeibfeceh
Badges: 14
Rep:
?
#14
Report 10 years ago
#14
OR you could just introduce him to a male friend
0
reply
xobarry_the_catxo
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#15
Report 10 years ago
#15
just say, "are you familiar with the legalities around touching a woman, if not, im sure you'll like prison"
0
reply
Tipitman
Badges: 1
Rep:
?
#16
Report 10 years ago
#16
Don't use cliche its stupid and ist not beliveable, just be nice andquickly break his heart he will get over it and its a good life lesson
0
reply
Makaveli_The_Don
Badges: 2
Rep:
?
#17
Report 10 years ago
#17
Tell him your taken lol
0
reply
X

Quick Reply

Attached files
Write a reply...
Reply
new posts
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

Have you registered to vote?

Yes! (490)
37.72%
No - but I will (100)
7.7%
No - I don't want to (88)
6.77%
No - I can't vote (<18, not in UK, etc) (621)
47.81%

Watched Threads

View All
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise