I can’t tell if he fancies me please help Watch

Lalalove27
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I fancy a guy in college who is a few years older than me. He is an anxious but happy go lucky person and he’s friendly to everyone.
At the beginning I saw him looking at me and then quickly looking away. He has recently started talking to me. When he was talking he barely made eye contact and was visibly nervous. I thought maybe more so than with others.
I worry that I fancy him much more and he isn’t that into me. It feels to be a more friendly vibe and I don’t want to come off as desperate just because I am.
I can usually tell if someone fancies me but not so much with this guy. I’m puzzled to be honest.
What would be the best thing to do next?
Last edited by Lalalove27; 1 week ago
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Elongatedbart
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heheheheheh im a guy and im in the exact situation as that guy. he likes you.
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Lalalove27
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(Original post by Elongatedbart)
heheheheheh im a guy and im in the exact situation as that guy. he likes you.
Heheheh thanks for commenting. So he’s nice but he just doesn’t make eye contact with me. I don’t wanna get my hopes up tho...
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sinfonietta
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Ask him on a date. Even if he isn't already interested in you that could prompt him to consider you as a potential partner.
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Elongatedbart
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(Original post by Lalalove27)
Heheheh thanks for commenting. So he’s nice but he just doesn’t make eye contact with me. I don’t wanna get my hopes up tho.if hes
if he hasn't been in that many relationships before, id say he likes you. My first potential gf left me because I was very awkward at the time, eye contact wise and other things. If you can, try and be near him at some point and mb make a comment. a lot of guys are hella nervous speaking to girls right away and so its way easier for them if a girl starts a convo and gets the ball rolling.

aLL in all, im pretty sure he likes you !
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Suggest spending time together
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Lalalove27
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(Original post by sinfonietta)
Ask him on a date. Even if he isn't already interested in you that could prompt him to consider you as a potential partner.
Fat chance unless I became possessed by some se*y succubus. Thank you though you are right
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Lalalove27
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(Original post by Elongatedbart)
if he hasn't been in that many relationships before, id say he likes you. My first potential gf left me because I was very awkward at the time, eye contact wise and other things. If you can, try and be near him at some point and mb make a comment. a lot of guys are hella nervous speaking to girls right away and so its way easier for them if a girl starts a convo and gets the ball rolling.

aLL in all, im pretty sure he likes you !
He was in a rel before for a while. He’s not that awkward just nervy? Imma keep pushing myself to talk to him casually. Thanks so much again!!!
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Elongatedbart
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(Original post by Lalalove27)
He was in a rel before for a while. He’s not that awkward just nervy? Imma keep pushing myself to talk to him casually. Thanks so much again!!!
im sure there's something there. Wish you the best!
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mgi
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(Original post by Lalalove27)
I fancy a guy in college who is a few years older than me. He is an anxious but happy go lucky person and he’s friendly to everyone.
At the beginning I saw him looking at me and then quickly looking away. He has recently started talking to me. When he was talking he barely made eye contact and was visibly nervous. I thought maybe more so than with others.
I worry that I fancy him much more and he isn’t that into me. It feels to be a more friendly vibe and I don’t want to come off as desperate just because I am.
I can usually tell if someone fancies me but not so much with this guy. I’m puzzled to be honest.
What would be the best thing to do next?
(Original post by Lalalove27)
He was in a rel before for a while. He’s not that awkward just nervy? Imma keep pushing myself to talk to him casually. Thanks so much again!!!
I reckon he likes you. When you chat casually you still need get a date with him. So invite him to the nearest cafe, or ask him if he is in a relationship/dating if no, then invite him!
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Lalalove27
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(Original post by mgi)
I reckon he likes you. When you chat casually you still need get a date with him. So invite him to the nearest cafe, or ask him if he is in a relationship/dating if no, then invite him!
I hope he feels the same I’m not sure why I feel he’s just being friendly perhaps overthinking it all way too much. Thank you for your advice !
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mgi
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(Original post by Lalalove27)
I hope he feels the same I’m not sure why I feel he’s just being friendly perhaps overthinking it all way too much. Thank you for your advice !
Stop overthinking things girl! You are not marrying him next week are you? lol. You can find out if a guy who is very nice, a bit nervy and can't maintain eye contact with you yet is just beiing friendly-yeah right maybe, i suppose maybe pigs can fly .lol.? So to find out, just do some tactics: you have to get close enough to him 'accidentally" fairly often so that you can chat. Then you can ask about his social life and his favourite food/drinks. And you "accidentally " notice that you like some foods and drinks that he likes!Then you can suggest, if you still like him, that you go out together for food and drink somewhere and chat some more, 1 to 1. If it goes well dont forget to encourage the guy to think about going on another date. Then let him do more of the arranging. And you do the observing and thinking! Its called the dating game: flowers attract bees but flowers don't chase bees!
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Lalalove27
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(Original post by mgi)
Stop overthinking things girl! You are not marrying him next week are you? lol. You can find out if a guy who is very nice, a bit nervy and can't maintain eye contact with you yet is just beiing friendly-yeah right maybe, i suppose maybe pigs can fly .lol.? So to find out, just do some tactics: you have to get close enough to him 'accidentally" fairly often so that you can chat. Then you can ask about his social life and his favourite food/drinks. And you "accidentally " notice that you like some foods and drinks that he likes!Then you can suggest, if you still like him, that you go out together for food and drink somewhere and chat some more, 1 to 1. If it goes well dont forget to encourage the guy to think about going on another date. Then let him do more of the arranging. And you do the observing and thinking! Its called the dating game: flowers attract bees but flowers don't chase bees!
Wow thank you! So basically I won’t find out i.e. pigs can fly , unless I put myself out there and push my own boundaries?
I don’t know if it’s some Disney programming sh*t that has made me think somehow one day I’ll meet Prince Charming and he’ll sweep me off my feet! In reality I gotta put in more effort to attract him, take action etc. yes yes yes thank you thank you thank you !
Indeed... What have I got to lose? I’m a 19 y/o and never been in a relationship ... yet.
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mgi
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(Original post by Lalalove27)
Wow thank you! So basically I won’t find out i.e. pigs can fly , unless I put myself out there and push my own boundaries?
I don’t know if it’s some Disney programming sh*t that has made me think somehow one day I’ll meet Prince Charming and he’ll sweep me off my feet! In reality I gotta put in more effort to attract him, take action etc. yes yes yes thank you thank you thank you !
Indeed... What have I got to lose? I’m a 19 y/o and never been in a relationship ... yet.
Yes. What you have just posted is absolutely spot on! Life is not a film. lol. If you look at any one in a relationship you will soon find out that one or both of them used "tactics" and "accidental " happenings to form their relationships. Its about sussing out where you stand with people and developing good convo skills does help. Relationships are not easy because you are giving a little piece of your heart, right? But the rewards can be very great! What you have to do is know what you like and want? Casual short-term physical relationships never work for me. because my hormones get wrapped up tightly so casual splitting up is much more painful to me. So I chose to date for commitment. Which means going slowly and getting to know the person for months before anything really intimate is allowed to happen. This is important if you are looking for a longterm closeness with someone. Remember to keep working on yourself and learn as much as you can about relationships and intimacy. Virginity really isn't a problem. Just remember the dating game: those "tactics" and " "accidentallys" lol.
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Lalalove27
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(Original post by mgi)
Yes. What you have just posted is absolutely spot on! Life is not a film. lol. If you look at any one in a relationship you will soon find out that one or both of them used "tactics" and "accidental " happenings to form their relationships. Its about sussing out where you stand with people and developing good convo skills does help. Relationships are not easy because you are giving a little piece of your heart, right? But the rewards can be very great! What you have to do is know what you like and want? Casual short-term physical relationships never work for me. because my hormones get wrapped up tightly so casual splitting up is much more painful to me. So I chose to date for commitment. Which means going slowly and getting to know the person for months before anything really intimate is allowed to happen. This is important if you are looking for a longterm closeness with someone. Remember to keep working on yourself and learn as much as you can about relationships and intimacy. Virginity really isn't a problem. Just remember the dating game: those "tactics" and " "accidentallys" lol.
I’m the same! Intimate, long term connections are what I long for. Except I have some intimacy phobia I’m currently working through.
I really needed to hear this and the timing is so perfect. Thank you so much my dear! I will use those accidentallys X
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mgi
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(Original post by Lalalove27)
I’m the same! Intimate, long term connections are what I long for. Except I have some intimacy phobia I’m currently working through.
I really needed to hear this and the timing is so perfect. Thank you so much my dear! I will use those accidentallys X
No problem. Intimacy works much better when you know yourself and the other person reasonably well. Don't be hard on yourself it takes time to work through intimacy challenges.
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