University is not what I thought it would be like Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
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#1
I came to university in September thinking that I'd make friends and have a good time but so far, that hasn't been the case. I've tried to make some friends by going to some fresher events, talking to flatmates and coursemates but I still haven't met anyone that I'd consider a friend yet. The first few weeks of class, I was in a lecture with two girls, we spoke a bit, then we followed each other on Instagram after one of them suggested that we could hang out, but we never did. I speak to some people in seminars and sit with them in lectures but we never do anything out of class. I think they already have their own groups of friends anyway.

I went clubbing for one of my society events, met two other girls, who I hung out with throughout the night, exchanged contact details again but I haven't seen either of them since. Then the last time I went to another one of the society meetings, I met a girl who I actually found out was in the same hall as me, followed her on Instagram and haven't seen her since (to be fair, this was only like two weeks ago, I haven't been to another society meeting yet). When people ask for my Instagram, I feel like that's it, I'll never hear from them again.

I'm in a block with over fifty people but no one ever talks to me or knocks on my door. I wouldn't mind so much if I had friends to hang out with but I don't. I honestly didn't think it would be this hard to make friends at university. At this point, I feel like I'm in a prison cell. I only come out to use the bathroom or go to class. I rarely go down to eat (catered accommodation) because I don't want to look like a loner. Can't even order a takeaway because there's no food places nearby and it will be awkward standing outside by myself waiting for it to arrive then carrying it back to my room alone. Literally all I eat these days are sandwiches or paninis.

I honestly thought that my university experience would be different. I came here wanting to join the gym and become healthier but nothing seems to be going to plan. I probably would have left by now if I didn't like my course. Does it get any better?
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Sataris
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Did you not start off going to meals with your flatmates at the start of the year?
Do you have any coursemates in your accommodation?
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Hudeyfa19
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I came to university in September thinking that I'd make friends and have a good time but so far, that hasn't been the case. I've tried to make some friends by going to some fresher events, talking to flatmates and coursemates but I still haven't met anyone that I'd consider a friend yet. The first few weeks of class, I was in a lecture with two girls, we spoke a bit, then we followed each other on Instagram after one of them suggested that we could hang out, but we never did. I speak to some people in seminars and sit with them in lectures but we never do anything out of class. I think they already have their own groups of friends anyway.

I went clubbing for one of my society events, met two other girls, who I hung out with throughout the night, exchanged contact details again but I haven't seen either of them since. Then the last time I went to another one of the society meetings, I met a girl who I actually found out was in the same hall as me, followed her on Instagram and haven't seen her since (to be fair, this was only like two weeks ago, I haven't been to another society meeting yet). When people ask for my Instagram, I feel like that's it, I'll never hear from them again.

I'm in a block with over fifty people but no one ever talks to me or knocks on my door. I wouldn't mind so much if I had friends to hang out with but I don't. I honestly didn't think it would be this hard to make friends at university. At this point, I feel like I'm in a prison cell. I only come out to use the bathroom or go to class. I rarely go down to eat (catered accommodation) because I don't want to look like a loner. Can't even order a takeaway because there's no food places nearby and it will be awkward standing outside by myself waiting for it to arrive then carrying it back to my room alone. Literally all I eat these days are sandwiches or paninis.

I honestly thought that my university experience would be different. I came here wanting to join the gym and become healthier but nothing seems to be going to plan. I probably would have left by now if I didn't like my course. Does it get any better?
I’m having quite a similar experience as you with the added addition that I do not live in accommodations as I have to commute to the university. If I may ask, what university do you go to?
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Anonymous #1
#4
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(Original post by Sataris)
Did you not start off going to meals with your flatmates at the start of the year?
Do you have any coursemates in your accommodation?
Yes, for about a month. It was easier since people used to ask in the group chat when they wanted to go down for dinner, but everyone seems to go at their own time now, I guess because of different timetables, them going with their friends instead and that. I do a joint honours and have only met two other people doing my exact course, but neither of them are in my hall unfortunately. Neither are the coursemates that are in most of my classes.

(Original post by Hudeyfa19)
I’m having quite a similar experience as you with the added addition that I do not live in accommodations as I have to commute to the university. If I may ask, what university do you go to?
I'm at University of Nottingham, what about you?
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StrangeSupernova
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having a very similar problem, i'm feeling incredibly lonely and depressed, not sure how to solve it , done all of the right things I think, just not really been accepted into a group or anything like that. Not enjoying my time at university at all :-((((((((
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Anonymous #2
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I'm exactly the same, not close with my flatmates (but they're all best friends) and dont like the people on my course. so rn i'm pretty much a loner, and people are already choosing houses for next year which is stressing me out since i have no one.
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Anonymous #3
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I came to university in September thinking that I'd make friends and have a good time but so far, that hasn't been the case. I've tried to make some friends by going to some fresher events, talking to flatmates and coursemates but I still haven't met anyone that I'd consider a friend yet. The first few weeks of class, I was in a lecture with two girls, we spoke a bit, then we followed each other on Instagram after one of them suggested that we could hang out, but we never did. I speak to some people in seminars and sit with them in lectures but we never do anything out of class. I think they already have their own groups of friends anyway.

I went clubbing for one of my society events, met two other girls, who I hung out with throughout the night, exchanged contact details again but I haven't seen either of them since. Then the last time I went to another one of the society meetings, I met a girl who I actually found out was in the same hall as me, followed her on Instagram and haven't seen her since (to be fair, this was only like two weeks ago, I haven't been to another society meeting yet). When people ask for my Instagram, I feel like that's it, I'll never hear from them again.

I'm in a block with over fifty people but no one ever talks to me or knocks on my door. I wouldn't mind so much if I had friends to hang out with but I don't. I honestly didn't think it would be this hard to make friends at university. At this point, I feel like I'm in a prison cell. I only come out to use the bathroom or go to class. I rarely go down to eat (catered accommodation) because I don't want to look like a loner. Can't even order a takeaway because there's no food places nearby and it will be awkward standing outside by myself waiting for it to arrive then carrying it back to my room alone. Literally all I eat these days are sandwiches or paninis.

I honestly thought that my university experience would be different. I came here wanting to join the gym and become healthier but nothing seems to be going to plan. I probably would have left by now if I didn't like my course. Does it get any better?
I hate uni too I’m gonna transfer next year so I commute as living out isn’t for me
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fionawalker
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Highly relatable. I thought everyone was going to be super open and friendly at uni but I've not found that at all. Even the people who are friendly aren't "friends" if that makes sense?
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Aadilkharl123
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(Original post by fionawalker)
Highly relatable. I thought everyone was going to be super open and friendly at uni but I've not found that at all. Even the people who are friendly aren't "friends" if that makes sense?
I agree,
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Anonymous #4
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#10
This is EXACTLY what I am going through as well.
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iamthestudent
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#11
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I came to university in September thinking that I'd make friends and have a good time but so far, that hasn't been the case. I've tried to make some friends by going to some fresher events, talking to flatmates and coursemates but I still haven't met anyone that I'd consider a friend yet. The first few weeks of class, I was in a lecture with two girls, we spoke a bit, then we followed each other on Instagram after one of them suggested that we could hang out, but we never did. I speak to some people in seminars and sit with them in lectures but we never do anything out of class. I think they already have their own groups of friends anyway.

I went clubbing for one of my society events, met two other girls, who I hung out with throughout the night, exchanged contact details again but I haven't seen either of them since. Then the last time I went to another one of the society meetings, I met a girl who I actually found out was in the same hall as me, followed her on Instagram and haven't seen her since (to be fair, this was only like two weeks ago, I haven't been to another society meeting yet). When people ask for my Instagram, I feel like that's it, I'll never hear from them again.

I'm in a block with over fifty people but no one ever talks to me or knocks on my door. I wouldn't mind so much if I had friends to hang out with but I don't. I honestly didn't think it would be this hard to make friends at university. At this point, I feel like I'm in a prison cell. I only come out to use the bathroom or go to class. I rarely go down to eat (catered accommodation) because I don't want to look like a loner. Can't even order a takeaway because there's no food places nearby and it will be awkward standing outside by myself waiting for it to arrive then carrying it back to my room alone. Literally all I eat these days are sandwiches or paninis.

I honestly thought that my university experience would be different. I came here wanting to join the gym and become healthier but nothing seems to be going to plan. I probably would have left by now if I didn't like my course. Does it get any better?
ur clearly not being very proactive in contacting these ppl to organise things so🤷🏽*♂️🤷🏽*♂️ 🤷🏽*♂️
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Aadilkharl123
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We are all in this together but at different Unis
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Anonymous #4
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(Original post by Aadilkharl123)
We are all in this together but at different Unis
It weirdly relaxes me to know that I am not the only one going through this. Everyone seems to have easily made friends, but I have bene feeling so lonely.
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Anonymous #4
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been**
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Aadilkharl123
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Dont worry about it, you just be you at Uni and you will find friends easily. Well thats what i used to think!!!!
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm exactly the same, not close with my flatmates (but they're all best friends) and dont like the people on my course. so rn i'm pretty much a loner, and people are already choosing houses for next year which is stressing me out since i have no one.
Exactly! They all seem so close and I'm getting worried about finding a house for next year as well. My mum keeps telling me not to leave it too late but I literally have no one to share a house with.

(Original post by fionawalker)
Highly relatable. I thought everyone was going to be super open and friendly at uni but I've not found that at all. Even the people who are friendly aren't "friends" if that makes sense?
My flatmates are friendly and nice but we don't really click since they like to go out a lot, whereas I like going out sometimes but not all the time.


(Original post by Anonymous)
It weirdly relaxes me to know that I am not the only one going through this. Everyone seems to have easily made friends, but I have bene feeling so lonely.
Me too. It's sad walking around campus seeing people with friends and being alone.

Glad I'm not the only one feeling like this. Hopefully it will get better for all of us!
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Hudeyfa123
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Yes, for about a month. It was easier since people used to ask in the group chat when they wanted to go down for dinner, but everyone seems to go at their own time now, I guess because of different timetables, them going with their friends instead and that. I do a joint honours and have only met two other people doing my exact course, but neither of them are in my hall unfortunately. Neither are the coursemates that are in most of my classes.


I'm at University of Nottingham, what about you?
Coventry University and what do you study?
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Rabbit2
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I would suggest forming one or more 'study groups' - start out in courses you are finding most difficult - those you need the most help in. Find two or three people in your class that are 'serious students', and suggest that you get together at a mutually convenient time to discuss the course work (and homework). I did this all through graduate school & i found it to be a tremendous help. I live about 35 miles outside D.C., and my graduate uni is in downtown. One of my 'regular' study buddies lived near D.C., and the other in Maryland (about 30 miles outside D.C. on the opposite side of town from me). We eventually settled on meeting on campus on Sundays - as the traffic was a minimum on that day, and we all were free then.

Whenever you do it, make a solid effort to show up when a meeting is scheduled, meet in the library, or wherever you can get a study room. Grad students had priority at my grad uni - so we could sign up for a room weeks in advance. Before an exam, we used to make up 'sample' exams - containing the questions we thought would be on the real one. I got pretty good at doing that. I would usually hit 80 to 90% of the questions on the real exam. Best of luck!!
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polokiev
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#19
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I came to university in September thinking that I'd make friends and have a good time but so far, that hasn't been the case. I've tried to make some friends by going to some fresher events, talking to flatmates and coursemates but I still haven't met anyone that I'd consider a friend yet. The first few weeks of class, I was in a lecture with two girls, we spoke a bit, then we followed each other on Instagram after one of them suggested that we could hang out, but we never did. I speak to some people in seminars and sit with them in lectures but we never do anything out of class. I think they already have their own groups of friends anyway.

I went clubbing for one of my society events, met two other girls, who I hung out with throughout the night, exchanged contact details again but I haven't seen either of them since. Then the last time I went to another one of the society meetings, I met a girl who I actually found out was in the same hall as me, followed her on Instagram and haven't seen her since (to be fair, this was only like two weeks ago, I haven't been to another society meeting yet). When people ask for my Instagram, I feel like that's it, I'll never hear from them again.

I'm in a block with over fifty people but no one ever talks to me or knocks on my door. I wouldn't mind so much if I had friends to hang out with but I don't. I honestly didn't think it would be this hard to make friends at university. At this point, I feel like I'm in a prison cell. I only come out to use the bathroom or go to class. I rarely go down to eat (catered accommodation) because I don't want to look like a loner. Can't even order a takeaway because there's no food places nearby and it will be awkward standing outside by myself waiting for it to arrive then carrying it back to my room alone. Literally all I eat these days are sandwiches or paninis.

I honestly thought that my university experience would be different. I came here wanting to join the gym and become healthier but nothing seems to be going to plan. I probably would have left by now if I didn't like my course. Does it get any better?
hiya, I study at Notts as a first year too, I don't know if there's any way to send a private message here but lmk if you want to talk or hang. I think a lot of us feel the same way, I definitely do and it's a relief to know we're not alone with this x
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steamed-hams
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you fell for the intense uni marketing. how do we persuade 18 year old into sickening crippling debt do we push the career prospects or graduate premium or do we hammer into their skulls the fukin amazing time they'll have and the fear of missing out
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