Low Motivation, College Attendance, and anxiety Watch

AngelaProt
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I've struggled with attendance for awhile now, not just at college either. It started in Year 8-9, I had a constant cycle in year 8, every Friday I was sick straight off the bus, I got sent home every week because of it. My attendance slowly started dropping, from 99% to 94%.

Year 9 hit me and I don't know what happened, I generally struggled to get in on time and I was constantly late, sometimes even 3-4 hours late. But, I kind of smacked myself each morning when I slept in, I'd think about it for an hour or so then just get up and go.

Year 10-11 came along and I basically didn't attend. Beginning of Year 10 started off alright, then I started having days off when I'd just not want to go in or if my anxiety was going crazy.
End of Year 11 I had an attendance percentage of 29%. I pretty much flunked every exam, only passed my art and English.

Same year, I some how got into a really good college and I'm now doing an animal management course. I started off really good, it's only 3 days a week so it isn't bad at all. I had 2 days off due to sickness, that took my 100% down to 80%! Which is pretty ridiculous. Then I've had really poor health, my mental health is getting better, anxiety is still quite bad but yeah.

My physical health isn't that good, I have multiple vitamin defiencies due to my bad eating habits, I barely eat full meals now.
Due to this I often find myself ill/sick, or attending doctors appointments. My attendance currently is at 60%, I had 2 days off and that took my repairing attendance of 65% down by 5%. Which is just ridiculous as well.

I'm really worried that my school attendance habits are coming back, it isn't affecting my college work as I've been on time with every assignment and passed them. I just don't want to get kicked off due to this, as it's the only thing which sort of keeps me sane, as work and home just make me bored.

I've tried seeking help about my mental health in the past with councillors but I always have trouble speaking and saying how I feel. It never really got sorted out in school time, and I'm afraid that my habits and bad mental health is making a comeback. I don't really know what to do to make myself motivated to go to college, as when I do I always question it. Please help!
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Pathway
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Right, so what is being done about the physical issues? Why are your eating habits bad? Is it mental health related or is there physical reasons (or is it a mix?)? You need to speak to someone about your mental health issues, I respect that it is hard to, but you need to do things that make you uncomfortable sometimes to gain more from them. What specifically makes it hard for you to speak to someone? Are you fearing being judged? Something else? Is it because it leaves you in a vulnerable position? Something else?
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AngelaProt
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(Original post by Pathway)
Right, so what is being done about the physical issues? Why are your eating habits bad? Is it mental health related or is there physical reasons (or is it a mix?)? You need to speak to someone about your mental health issues, I respect that it is hard to, but you need to do things that make you uncomfortable sometimes to gain more from them. What specifically makes it hard for you to speak to someone? Are you fearing being judged? Something else? Is it because it leaves you in a vulnerable position? Something else?
I take iron tablets, other vitamins as prescribed by the doctors to combat the anaemia.
My eating habits started in year 10, I think it was mental then as I started thinking more about my looks and body, and would generally starve myself until I got home. I lost quite a bit of weight from it but it affected my anaemia and mental health.

Since then, I've never been able to eat much, I can barely get a whole meal eaten without feeling full.

I think what makes it hard for me to speak to people is that I generally find it hard to speak or make conversations with people I don't know.

When I try it usually just ends bluntly and I just stay quiet, in secondary school I had a two councillors, both said that it was confidential but pretty much everything I said to them was written up and sent to my parents. And they treated me like a toddler most times, hence why I find it hard to speak or trust people.
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Pathway
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(Original post by AngelaProt)
I take iron tablets, other vitamins as prescribed by the doctors to combat the anaemia.
My eating habits started in year 10, I think it was mental then as I started thinking more about my looks and body, and would generally starve myself until I got home. I lost quite a bit of weight from it but it affected my anaemia and mental health.

Since then, I've never been able to eat much, I can barely get a whole meal eaten without feeling full.

I think what makes it hard for me to speak to people is that I generally find it hard to speak or make conversations with people I don't know.

When I try it usually just ends bluntly and I just stay quiet, in secondary school I had a two councillors, both said that it was confidential but pretty much everything I said to them was written up and sent to my parents. And they treated me like a toddler most times, hence why I find it hard to speak or trust people.
Have you ever been assessed for an eating disorder? If not, you should try and explain this to your GP (even if it is no longer mental, and is primarily physical). This is because sometimes eating disorders can lead to various physical complications that make eating more difficult than it otherwise should be. Please speak to someone about this.

I understand. Would speaking to a school teacher or a family member help? That way you know them? How old were you at the time you saw these counsellors? How old are you now?
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AngelaProt
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(Original post by Pathway)
Have you ever been assessed for an eating disorder? If not, you should try and explain this to your GP (even if it is no longer mental, and is primarily physical). This is because sometimes eating disorders can lead to various physical complications that make eating more difficult than it otherwise should be. Please speak to someone about this.

I understand. Would speaking to a school teacher or a family member help? That way you know them? How old were you at the time you saw these counsellors? How old are you now?
I've never been diagnosed with any eating disorder. I've mentioned it but haven't actually spoken just about it.

I usually speak to my dad and his partner (he's seperated from my mum), as they're the only people who I think listen.
The last time I saw those councillors I was 14-15, I'm now 17.
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Pathway
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(Original post by AngelaProt)
I've never been diagnosed with any eating disorder. I've mentioned it but haven't actually spoken just about it.

I usually speak to my dad and his partner (he's seperated from my mum), as they're the only people who I think listen.
The last time I saw those councillors I was 14-15, I'm now 17.
I think it's worth speaking about to a doctor.

See, at that age they were duty bound to inform your mother. You were under the age of 16. Now, you'd be entitled to confidentiality. They wouldn't talk unless you gave permission or you were at risk.
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Xarao
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You being late isn't because of whatever disease you have, it's just pure laziness. It's up to you if you want to continue or change your "habit", but at this rate you won't get far in life.
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vernyed
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following because i have the same issue
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AngelaProt
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(Original post by Pathway)
I think it's worth speaking about to a doctor.

See, at that age they were duty bound to inform your mother. You were under the age of 16. Now, you'd be entitled to confidentiality. They wouldn't talk unless you gave permission or you were at risk
Mhm, I think it was mainly the reactions from my mum, she always made a massive deal over it, even got a family Councillor because of them.

My dad always understood, never really questioned or put things on me without actually telling me, my mum got all these councillors and the family Councillor without actually telling any of us.
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