Boyfriend refuses to buy me pads Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
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My boyfriend of a year is 19 and I asked him if he could buy me pads as I had left my purse at home and we were at uni. He seemed shocked that I asked him and straight out said 'no! You buy your own. It's not normal for guys to buy those' which I was really surprised to hear. He's generally really sweet and caring towards me and hearing him say that made me really upset. I had to make do with toilet roll for the rest of the day. My friend's boyfriend seems to be ok with getting pads for her and says its like buying her anything else that she would need, so it's not exactly unusual. My dad and brother are fine with buying pads for me whenever they do the family shop. I never thought he would be the type of person to say something like that.

Am I right to be upset about this, or am I really asking for too much?
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ساره
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#2
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wow i feel like its normal for guys to buy pads especially if its an emergency situation
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ThuggerThugger
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My GF asks me to do this for her, clearly the person at the till knows they aren’t for me and tbh doubt they give it a second thought and even if they did who cares? Your BF is wrong for this, even if he was uncomfortable with it you clearly needed it so he should have swallowed his pride. You should talk to him about this tbh, he may not realise the necessity of it.

Also why couldn’t he give you the cash and you go and buy it?
Last edited by ThuggerThugger; 3 weeks ago
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Karisa96
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(Original post by Anonymous)
My boyfriend of a year is 19 and I asked him if he could buy me pads as I had left my purse at home and we were at uni. He seemed shocked that I asked him and straight out said 'no! You buy your own. It's not normal for guys to buy those' which I was really surprised to hear. He's generally really sweet and caring towards me and hearing him say that made me really upset. I had to make do with toilet roll for the rest of the day. My friend's boyfriend seems to be ok with getting pads for her and says its like buying her anything else that she would need, so it's not exactly unusual. My dad and brother are fine with buying pads for me whenever they do the family shop. I never thought he would be the type of person to say something like that.

Am I right to be upset about this, or am I really asking for too much?
You may just be overthinking here.
It's not whatever us girls think something a man would buy everyday.
It could just be embarrassment, I would not read to much into it.
When I was in a relationship it was something I always bought.
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DiddyDecAlt
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That is really odd.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Karisa96)
You may just be overthinking here.
It's not whatever us girls think something a man would buy everyday.
It could just be embarrassment, I would not read to much into it.
When I was in a relationship it was something I always bought.
I get that but this was an emergency where I ended up having to make do with toilet roll and was constantly worrying about it leaking when he could've helped me out a bit by buying pads
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Ilovebeef19
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(Original post by Anonymous)
My boyfriend of a year is 19 and I asked him if he could buy me pads as I had left my purse at home and we were at uni. He seemed shocked that I asked him and straight out said 'no! You buy your own. It's not normal for guys to buy those' which I was really surprised to hear. He's generally really sweet and caring towards me and hearing him say that made me really upset. I had to make do with toilet roll for the rest of the day. My friend's boyfriend seems to be ok with getting pads for her and says its like buying her anything else that she would need, so it's not exactly unusual. My dad and brother are fine with buying pads for me whenever they do the family shop. I never thought he would be the type of person to say something like that.

Am I right to be upset about this, or am I really asking for too much?
Yes, you are right to be upset. He's being very immature.
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AzureCeleste
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It was ridiculous of him
If he was embarrssed you could've asked for his card/cash and paid him back?
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Karisa96
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I get that but this was an emergency where I ended up having to make do with toilet roll and was constantly worrying about it leaking when he could've helped me out a bit by buying pads
I see.
I think under those special circumstances he could have helped you out. Not very pleasant. I would like to think if I had a boyfriend and was in a similar scenario he would certainly buy some pads for me. X
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doodle_333
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why couldn't he lend you money? I would generally buy my own but my bf wouldn't leave me uncomfortable or at risk of leaking over pride. It's kinda crappy he did that but tbf he may not understand the consequences, there's still men who think we can 'hold it' like it's pee...
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tashkent46
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Why are u making this his problem? You are a grown woman, it is your responsibility to ensure you have adequate protection - begging your boyfriend to do it just isn't on. Maybe he is embarrassed yes, but at the end of the day it shouldn't be his responsibility to buy it for you.
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sinfonietta
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Why didn't you just ask him for the money to buy them yourself?

He didn't want to do it because he'd find it embarassing. It doesn't mean he doesn't care about you.
Last edited by sinfonietta; 3 weeks ago
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YaliaV
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(Original post by tashkent46)
Why are u making this his problem? You are a grown woman, it is your responsibility to ensure you have adequate protection - begging your boyfriend to do it just isn't on. Maybe he is embarrassed yes, but at the end of the day it shouldn't be his responsibility to buy it for you.
She left her purse at home and your attitude is ridiculous. He could have given her the money if he wanted to be a man-child.
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Anonymous #2
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That was really awful of him. Sorry you had to make do with toilet paper. That's a big red flag to me, a truly "caring" person wouldn't behave like this.
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by sinfonietta)
Why didn't you just ask him for the money to buy them yourself?

He didn't want to do it because he'd find it embarassing. It doesn't mean he doesn't care about you.
While she's bleeding through her clothing?
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sinfonietta
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(Original post by Anonymous)
While she's bleeding through her clothing?
If she managed to get through the rest of the day using toilet roll she could have managed to get to a shop.
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tashkent46
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(Original post by YaliaV)
She left her purse at home and your attitude is ridiculous. He could have given her the money if he wanted to be a man-child.
Yeah sure she did. Why should he spend his money on something that embarrases him when it is clearly her responsibility to make sure she has some? Are u expecting me to believe she couldn't have come back later or made sure she had some before.
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tashkent46
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(Original post by sinfonietta)
If she managed to get through the rest of the day using toilet roll she could have managed to get to a shop.
It sounds like lots of excuses to me. If it was such a pressing issue she should have had some ready or could have got more - if she left it to the point she couldn't do anything (and conveniently forgot her purse) I don't see how that's his issue. Sounds like she's looking to blame him.
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YaliaV
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(Original post by tashkent46)
Yeah sure she did. Why should he spend his money on something that embarrases him when it is clearly her responsibility to make sure she has some? Are u expecting me to believe she couldn't have come back later or made sure she had some before.
He could have lent her the money and I really don’t see the big issue. It isn’t his responsibility, but it would have been the caring thing to do. You only do things if you’re obligated? Relationships don’t work like that.
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tashkent46
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(Original post by YaliaV)
He could have lent her the money and I really don’t see the big issue. It isn’t his responsibility, but it would have been the caring thing to do. You only do things if you’re obligated? Relationships don’t work like that.
Relationships aren't one sided either, both parties are expected to behave like adults and take responsibility - she is blaming her boyfriend for a mistake she has made and paid the price for. At least now she will probably stock up on them instead of waiting until last minute.
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