Blood Brothers Mrs Johnstone

I haven’t read the play, so can’t really comment on the line of argument. However, I would say you need to use more punctuation, as at the moment it reads a little bit like a ramble. Just as an example of how I would edit this:

‘In Willy Russel’s ‘Blood Brothers’, Mrs. Johnstone is presented as a vulnerable character. Vulnerable by nature and by situation, she lives alone caring for her seven children, which enables Russel to present his audience with a character whose naivety stems from circumstance. Mrs. Johnstone is shown to be a kind woman, who at heart ‘loves the bones of every one’ of her children. This only adds to her tragedy, as her naivety and kindness leads to her losing custody of one of her children. No matter how much she tries to protect them, her working class social status leaves her vulnerable to loss. It is through her that Russel challenges and exposes the injustice of the societal pressures that are placed on lower income families. He furthers his point by making Mrs. Johnstone’s troubles not only visible in her surroundings, but also through her appearance, stating that she looks ‘forty-two’. Whilst Russel was working at a comprehensive school, he saw that everyone is born equal, and it is only circumstance that is changed by wealth. This opinion was not shared by the Prime Minister of the time, who did not see the same value in working class people.’

This is to give you an idea of how you could write it to keep a clear line of argument, and break up those longer sentences. Keep in mind that I haven’t read the play, and this is only my opinion of course!

Thanks I struggle with syntax and making my work flow. Thanks alot