Parents on TSR

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WLR
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Hi guys, not sure where to post, kinda killing my anxiety connected to the reallocation of my Ox application and lack of more info, even tho just one day passed haha. I am an international applicant (law if ure interested), I come from Poland and have been on TSR for around a month - it honestly helped me a lot so thanks to the community I guess. Anyway, there is one interesting trend that I spotted - there are numerous applicants' parents on TSR just kinda doing their kids' job when it comes to the application - keeping track of unis/colleges that respond, admissions details, etc. I'm not saying that it's bad but just seems quite odd to me. Where I come from uni application is something children and children only take care of, and that is why I find this quite surprising. Don't wanna sound disapproving tho, just asking if anyone knows the reason for it
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username4952620
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Oxford Mum

take the stage...
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Leviathan1611
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in my view, I'm guessing it's because parents just want their kids to focus on getting the grades and spending time with their friends. and not 'stress' about university applications.
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Chronoscope
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The Parent Room :007:

It can be good to have a parents opinion though imo (not a parent, lol) :yep:
Last edited by Chronoscope; 1 year ago
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Reality Check
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(Original post by WLR)
Hi guys, not sure where to post, kinda killing my anxiety connected to the reallocation of my Ox application and lack of more info, even tho just one day passed haha. I am an international applicant (law if ure interested), I come from Poland and have been on TSR for around a month - it honestly helped me a lot so thanks to the community I guess. Anyway, there is one interesting trend that I spotted - there are numerous applicants' parents on TSR just kinda doing their kids' job when it comes to the application - keeping track of unis/colleges that respond, admissions details, etc. I'm not saying that it's bad but just seems quite odd to me. Where I come from uni application is something children and children only take care of, and that is why I find this quite surprising. Don't wanna sound disapproving tho, just asking if anyone knows the reason for it
An oxbridge application is quite an undertaking, and emotionally exhausting for the family, not just the applicant. Parents are often also quite in the dark about the whole process if they don't know the system, and whereas the applicant is 'in the moment', the parents can be left feeling a bit bewildered by the whole thing.

Parents find TSR a very good source of up-to-date information about the application process, and it's a boon that there are other parents here going through the same trials and tribulations. It also has to be said that some applicants can be a bit nonchalant about their applications, and it's the parents who are full of stress and worry on behalf of the applicant! By and large, though, parents use TSR in the same way as students do: to find out information, to ask questions and be supported in a likeminded community. That's what's great about TSR
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Oxford Mum
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I used tsr as a parent whilst my children were applying to Oxford. They thought it was naff and besides they were too busy applying themselves.

I was very grateful to other adults on here, particularly nexttime The_Lonely_Goatherd and one fantastic person studying languages at Magdalen called such a lady. Her advice really helped get my elder son through.

As a born researcher, my busy sons used to ask me choose a college with a scholarship or find me a professor where they specialise in the brain. The Oxbridge specialist at my sons’ school was useless and even told me what turned out to be bad advice, so I clued myself up on the process and developed some useful techniques. Not only did my own sons get in, but so did many of their friends. One is at Cambridge reading economics, having been rejected from there before I met her.

My Oxford obsession led me to write a book called Oxford demystified. I try to use a good sense of humour and encouragement as well as facts. For instance which other Oxford entrance book talks about singing nuns and kit kats?

Even better some of my protégés have written chapters of the book telling us how they got in for their own subject! They have been very useful according to the students.

Also of course I have included many YouTube videos, student vlogs and comments from Oxford and oxford professors as well to back up my theories

There are also tips to enhance your application such as visiting the Cambridge science fair and essay competitions. Also there is a chapter on state school schemes, as I am committed to helping students who cannot afford a private education and whose school do not know how to go about applying to Oxbridge.

Once the students found out what I do they started sending me pms and I have been more than happy to help and encourage. They have been surprised I have replied at all, and have been so happy to chat I have often been messaged several times. In fact at one point I had 500 pms in my inbox. It has tailed off a bit since I put the book out for free on tsr but I must have still received upwards of 700 messages.

But if you think I’m weird and think I have no place on tsr, I could still leave....
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Oxford Mum
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Might I add that I also have my own thread called the Oxford parents association where lurking parents can chat, and ask questions .

I have also done reports on Oxford quirks such as formal hall, boat burning and the corpus tortoise race.

Many parents have commented ( for reasons you have described, op, they feel intimidated out of posting on the student threads,). Some join especially to take part in the association which is nice. I set it up because I felt intimidated myself and wanted somewhere where Oxford parents could relax and chat.

I have met many parents on there, but students visit, people who aren’t interested in Oxford but want to find out about it and have a virtual tea and cookies. We are sometimes joined by graduates line nexttime with many handy hints for example about parking outside the college, what to bring, missing out kids etc. There have also been other visitors such as Oxford professors, the lovely Reality Check and the sadly missed doones (you probably won’t remember him)

Anyway if you get a place and want to find out what it’s like to live in an Oxford college, you may want to join us. You would be more than welcome!
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WLR
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(Original post by Oxford Mum)
I used tsr as a parent whilst my children were applying to Oxford. They thought it was naff and besides they were too busy applying themselves.

I was very grateful to other adults on here, particularly nexttime The_Lonely_Goatherd and one fantastic person studying languages at Magdalen called such a lady. Her advice really helped get my elder son through.

As a born researcher, my busy sons used to ask me choose a college with a scholarship or find me a professor where they specialise in the brain. The Oxbridge specialist at my sons’ school was useless and even told me what turned out to be bad advice, so I clued myself up on the process and developed some useful techniques. Not only did my own sons get in, but so did many of their friends. One is at Cambridge reading economics, having been rejected from there before I met her.

My Oxford obsession led me to write a book called Oxford demystified. I try to use a good sense of humour and encouragement as well as facts. For instance which other Oxford entrance book talks about singing nuns and kit kats?

Even better some of my protégés have written chapters of the book telling us how they got in for their own subject! They have been very useful according to the students.

Also of course I have included many YouTube videos, student vlogs and comments from Oxford and oxford professors as well to back up my theories

There are also tips to enhance your application such as visiting the Cambridge science fair and essay competitions. Also there is a chapter on state school schemes, as I am committed to helping students who cannot afford a private education and whose school do not know how to go about applying to Oxbridge.

Once the students found out what I do they started sending me pms and I have been more than happy to help and encourage. They have been surprised I have replied at all, and have been so happy to chat I have often been messaged several times. In fact at one point I had 500 pms in my inbox. It has tailed off a bit since I put the book out for free on tsr but I must have still received upwards of 700 messages.

But if you think I’m weird and think I have no place on tsr, I could still leave....
I don't by any means want to be offensive, the parents' thing is just something I spotted while scrolling through TSR. It's just interesting due to the fact that in my "environment", which is generally families who are well of (other families wouldn't really be able to send children to the UK), the only additional help most of the kids see are individual tutors through private companies like Elab etc. We do get some help from our teachers, but it is only due to the fact that I attend a small, private school, and the school doesn't really 'intervene' in the application itself, meaning it only focuses on personal statements and recommendations, rather than following the process. That's why I just wanted to know where so much assistance given to applicants comes from, and tbh I'm kinda jealous now haha
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Oxford Mum
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Jealous of what? I help any student who asks me, regardless of what school they went to and how much help they have had. My sons went to a small private school too, and received no real help and that is when I used tsr common sense frankly and spoke to admissions tutors and to the students themselves. When I get to work I will post my book on this thread. Please refer to the chapter called making your application, which has a section on interviews, including oxford sources saying what they are looking for, plus comments and YouTube videos from successful applicants. If you do get a place, hopefully you will read the chapter if you get in, wrieen by my elder son, who talks about dealing with tutorials, what the tutors expect, freshers week, the social life and coping with stress.
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WLR
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(Original post by Oxford Mum)
Jealous of what? I help any student who asks me, regardless of what school they went to and how much help they have had. My sons went to a small private school too, and received no real help and that is when I used tsr common sense frankly and spoke to admissions tutors and to the students themselves. When I get to work I will post my book on this thread. Please refer to the chapter called making your application, which has a section on interviews, including oxford sources saying what they are looking for, plus comments and YouTube videos from successful applicants. If you do get a place, hopefully you will read the chapter if you get in, wrieen by my elder son, who talks about dealing with tutorials, what the tutors expect, freshers week, the social life and coping with stress.
I mean I’m jealous In general of the schooling system in the UK and the very fact that there is something like “oxbridge specialist”. Thank you in advance for posting the book . Once again it was just interesting for me that certain parents get involved in the whole application process, most likely it’s a sort of cultural difference as here, in PL, studies are treated like a privelage and not everyone decides to study/is able to get to a uni. Studying abroad is sadly something not many can afford and Polish unis are extremely weak and old fashioned (in a bad sense though). Russia for instance, which is far behind Poland in practically every ranking regarding social policies, has way better unis. Higher education in our country is a joke, unfortunately . That is the reason young Poles leave and it’s kind of a sad reflection...
Last edited by WLR; 1 year ago
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statsboi2002
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Tthe parents that post on the student room aren't the norm for students in the UK. They just get attention because of the different experience they have of the admissions process, having experienced it through their kids and not directly, like most people on here. Parents of TSR can be very helpful to students currently applying to uni as they are often very knowledgeable and authoritative in their manner of posting.

I'm a UK student and my parents aren't intervening in my uni applications at all: they're just leaving me to get on with it. They don't know anything about the process and thus are no help to me besides moral support. I'm sure my parents would be proud if I did get into Oxford (my dream uni) but applying is all up to me. Sometimes I wish they took a bit more interest to be honest.
This seems to be the norm amongst my friends, besides a few pushy parents who went to uni themselves and want their kids to follow in their footsteps.
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Oxford Mum
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Believe me, many people in Britain end up in rubbish schools with no Oxford specialist. That’s what I’m on here for to bridge that gap and give everyone a chance, especially if they did not go to Eton etc
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WLR
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(Original post by Oxford Mum)
Believe me, many people in Britain end up in rubbish schools with no Oxford specialist. That’s what I’m on here for to bridge that gap and give everyone a chance, especially if they did not go to Eton etc
That’s great to hear honestly. I’m happy there are still people willing to help free willingly
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Oxford Mum
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https://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/sho....php?t=6100480

WLR this is the link to my book. Hope you find the interviews section useful.

Lots of law interview questions for you to practise:

https://sites.google.com/site/oxbrid...wquestions/law
http://www.oxfordinterviewquestions.com/questions/law/

The very best of luck to you.
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Oxford Mum
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(Original post by statsboi2002)
Tthe parents that post on the student room aren't the norm for students in the UK. They just get attention because of the different experience they have of the admissions process, having experienced it through their kids and not directly, like most people on here. Parents of TSR can be very helpful to students currently applying to uni as they are often very knowledgeable and authoritative in their manner of posting.

I'm a UK student and my parents aren't intervening in my uni applications at all: they're just leaving me to get on with it. They don't know anything about the process and thus are no help to me besides moral support. I'm sure my parents would be proud if I did get into Oxford (my dream uni) but applying is all up to me. Sometimes I wish they took a bit more interest to be honest.
This seems to be the norm amongst my friends, besides a few pushy parents who went to uni themselves and want their kids to follow in their footsteps.
Hi statsboi2002 what a great post! I do so HATE being the norm!!!

If you are applying in future years, please do look at my book as well (see link below). Hope it is useful. There is no guarantee (for anyone) that you will get into Oxford, but in the book there are a few signposts you can use to give you some ideas and inspiration. The rest is up to you. Good luck!!
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WLR
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(Original post by Oxford Mum)
https://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/sho....php?t=6100480

WLR this is the link to my book. Hope you find the interviews section useful.

Lots of law interview questions for you to practise:

https://sites.google.com/site/oxbrid...wquestions/law
http://www.oxfordinterviewquestions.com/questions/law/

The very best of luck to you.
Thank you very much!
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Isinglass
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As a parent, I was first drawn to check out TSR a few years back, when our eldest was applying to university - application process entirely down to him, btw, with assistance, where needed, from school (I never did see his PS, for a start). I found it interesting to read about the experience of others applying for the same subject / to the same universities. And like many of the other parents and other assorted 'grown ups' on here, I am only too happy to try to offer help where I can🙂.
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squeakysquirrel
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(Original post by WLR)
Hi guys, not sure where to post, kinda killing my anxiety connected to the reallocation of my Ox application and lack of more info, even tho just one day passed haha. I am an international applicant (law if ure interested), I come from Poland and have been on TSR for around a month - it honestly helped me a lot so thanks to the community I guess. Anyway, there is one interesting trend that I spotted - there are numerous applicants' parents on TSR just kinda doing their kids' job when it comes to the application - keeping track of unis/colleges that respond, admissions details, etc. I'm not saying that it's bad but just seems quite odd to me. Where I come from uni application is something children and children only take care of, and that is why I find this quite surprising. Don't wanna sound disapproving tho, just asking if anyone knows the reason for it
It isn't just for Oxbridge. As parents we have advantages in that we have insight into certain things.

Kids will pick a university because the accommodation is cool, or their friends are going there. Or they will pick silly courses because they sound great

http://studentlifeguide.co.uk/lifest...waste-9k-year/

When you are spending 9k a year for fees and then everything else on top you need to get value for money.

Since a huge number of degrees nowadays don't add value - ie you aren't any better off with a degree, you really need help to get the right one
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WLR
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(Original post by squeakysquirrel)
It isn't just for Oxbridge. As parents we have advantages in that we have insight into certain things.

Kids will pick a university because the accommodation is cool, or their friends are going there. Or they will pick silly courses because they sound great

http://studentlifeguide.co.uk/lifest...waste-9k-year/

When you are spending 9k a year for fees and then everything else on top you need to get value for money.

Since a huge number of degrees nowadays don't add value - ie you aren't any better off with a degree, you really need help to get the right one
I know what you mean I guess... I myself was tempted to apply for international relations but decided this might not be the best of decisions...
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