Sleeping with someones boyfriend... Am I in the wrong? Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
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#1
So i slept with someone who i knew has a girlfriend. They've been together 2 years but from what Ive heard he talks to other girls and they dont have the best relationship. No excuse for me sleeping with him, I know that.
I was very drunk and so was he. I was lonely, Im going through a lot at the moment and guess I wanted the comfort. Doesnt excuse it though, I know!
We did it in a hotel and she found out by reading his texts. I denied it, saying we met up but never slept together. Im not telling her who I am cause I live in a small city where everyone knows everyone.
He has denied ever even meeting me to her.
I feel really guilty, shes been nice to me with her messages, which makes me feel bad for lying to her but I dont know this girl at all and dont want to be the one to tell her.
I cant eat and feel sick with shame. After we slept together he got up and left straight away, leaving me in the hotel room on my own in the middle of the night.I think he felt bad for her.
How do I deal with this guilt? I feel like I've ruined her life if she finds out we had sex.
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Anonymous #2
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Just think if it was you in her shoes,

Whilst you haven't 'technically' done anything wrong (presuming you are single), You are in the wrong for lying to her when she asked you straight up, she's found evidence which means she'll always be suspicious and I personally would feel guilty watching her get treated badly by someone who clearly doesn't care about her... but hey that's just me.

*Lets hope you had safe sex too, if you didn't then you really need to tell his poor girlfriend as he's probably slept with multiple girls behind her back
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Zarek
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To be honest the culpability predominantly lies with him. He's the one that cheated on his partner and skulked off like a scoundrel. Put it down to experience and move on.
Last edited by Zarek; 1 week ago
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londonmyst
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Why are you feeling ashamed?
For telling a lie, combining alcohol with sex then regretting it or for the fact that the guy with the gf is a deceitful player with little appetite for monogamous relationships.

You haven't ruined anyones life.
Nor committed a crime or broken up a marriage.
Don't torture yourself with constant shame and guilt.

Nothing you have done is illegal.
You can get get as drunk as you want, have sex with as many random guys as you want and choose to tell as many lies as you want.
Or you can demonstrate some self-restraint.
Your life, your future and your choice.
Good luck.
Last edited by londonmyst; 1 week ago
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Sarah_xxx
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I dont think youre in the wrong, but you should have told her the truth
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ProbablyPallas
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#6
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I'd probably argue that you were in the wrong for sleeping with him knowing that he was dating your friend. You need to tell your friend because she deserves better than both of you. Being drunk isn't an excuse and you shouldn't have lied; you've dug yourself into a bigger hole now. It's both of your faults. You should both take responsibility.
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