Girlfriend of convenience? Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 1 week ago
#1
So I'm contemplating my relationship of 1 year. A user here keeps saying I'm just in a relationship for familiarity. Which is what my mom just said today.

Anyways backstory.

I moved to Portugal and I had a friend from college who I wasn't interested in. Shes portuguese. Had not seen her over a year and when I moved to Portugal, I was completely new and unfamiliar there. So I turned to her for help as shes portuguese.

She offered to help and we started hanging out during breaks, frequently messaging and had sex. Then we started dating. She studies in London at my university so we are in LDR but we meet each other when she comes here or we go somewhere.*

Earlier I wasn't interested in her when we were still at university and just a few months before we got close, I had a bad ending with a girl I wanted to be in a relationship with. I made many mistakes with her hence we just couldn't get together.

After that incident, I was bitter and hateful of the girl as I blamed her though subconsciously I knew I was at fault but my ego refused to accept that to her.

I decided to let her go and move for better life and this is what happened. I mean we share common points and enjoy each others company but I didnt have the kind of connection.

We ve met each others families and my mom rejected her saying shes a safe option and she doesnt see any real spark in us.

Is this a relationship of convenience ? Is it genuine or just a safe option as she provides familiarity and sex?
0
reply
sinfonietta
Badges: 22
Rep:
?
#2
Report 1 week ago
#2
Are you happy with her right now?

If so that is all that should matter.
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#3
Report Thread starter 1 week ago
#3
(Original post by sinfonietta)
Are you happy with her right now?

If so that is all that should matter.
I'm not asking that. The base of any relationship should be solid. That's all I want to know. I ve been happy in earlier situations but that doesnt mean anything
0
reply
rux23uk
Badges: 6
Rep:
?
#4
Report 1 week ago
#4
When I first met my boyfriend now husband, I was at a stage that I didn't want a relationship anymore especially a boyfriend. But when I met him we had exactly what how said minus the sex or the sexual spark, we became best friends at some level that we were really comfortable with each other and really enjoyed each other companies he never had a girlfriend before and he didn't really want one either. But it sort of happended... Now we ve been togheter for 6 years married for almost 2 and it seems like we are soulmates. So I would say to still stay and see how you feel..
0
reply
rux23uk
Badges: 6
Rep:
?
#5
Report 1 week ago
#5
Jesus Christ my English, *company **together etc. sorry I m on my phone.
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#6
Report Thread starter 1 week ago
#6
(Original post by rux23uk)
When I first met my boyfriend now husband, I was at a stage that I didn't want a relationship anymore especially a boyfriend. But when I met him we had exactly what how said minus the sex or the sexual spark, we became best friends at some level that we were really comfortable with each other and really enjoyed each other companies he never had a girlfriend before and he didn't really want one either. But it sort of happended... Now we ve been togheter for 6 years married for almost 2 and it seems like we are soulmates. So I would say to still stay and see how you feel..
When did you meet him and what age?

Well based on my post who do you think could be my soulmate? I dont believe in them but if you can choose one then who ?

The girl I wanted but fate ruined us. Or the girl I didnt like romantically but upon moving to her country, we got together.

I doubt the soulmates thing so if you can choose then who?
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#7
Report Thread starter 1 week ago
#7
(Original post by rux23uk)
Jesus Christ my English, *company **together etc. sorry I m on my phone.
It's okay. Everyone makes mistakes
0
reply
AStarAnnabelle
Badges: 2
Rep:
?
#8
Report 1 week ago
#8
(Original post by Anonymous)
It's okay. Everyone makes mistakes
everybody has those days

everybody knows what, what im talking about everybody gets that way
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#9
Report Thread starter 1 week ago
#9
(Original post by rux23uk)
When I first met my boyfriend now husband, I was at a stage that I didn't want a relationship anymore especially a boyfriend. But when I met him we had exactly what how said minus the sex or the sexual spark, we became best friends at some level that we were really comfortable with each other and really enjoyed each other companies he never had a girlfriend before and he didn't really want one either. But it sort of happended... Now we ve been togheter for 6 years married for almost 2 and it seems like we are soulmates. So I would say to still stay and see how you feel..
Yours is different though. I knew my girlfriend and we weren't best friends or anything. I was hooking up with another girl and then the girl came along whom I fell out with. Spent 1 full year after her but had so bad timing, miscommunication, my immaturity everything in the mix.

My gf and I got together when I moved to her country.
0
reply
Anonymous #2
#10
Report 1 week ago
#10
Why did you go to Portugal? Were you subconsciously going there hoping you'd meet her again there when she came back?
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#11
Report Thread starter 1 week ago
#11
(Original post by Anonymous)
Why did you go to Portugal? Were you subconsciously going there hoping you'd meet her again there when she came back?
It was a spur of the moment decision to just move to a place which is sunny and I wanted to join NGO dedicated to refugees as I was told by friends.

No. She studied in the same university as me so I didnt go there hoping to see here. She was already in the city when i went back to my country.
I ve mentioned i had no romantic interest in her before.
0
reply
Anonymous #3
#12
Report 1 week ago
#12
awks i think i know who you are.
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#13
Report Thread starter 1 week ago
#13
(Original post by Anonymous)
awks i think i know who you are.
I'm italian by the way
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#14
Report Thread starter 1 week ago
#14
(Original post by Anonymous)
awks i think i know who you are.
Why awks.
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#15
Report Thread starter 1 week ago
#15
This thread probably died lmao. Okay whatever. Then there's someone claiming they know who I am. Like really?
0
reply
Anonymous #3
#16
Report 1 week ago
#16
(Original post by Anonymous)
This thread probably died lmao. Okay whatever. Then there's someone claiming they know who I am. Like really?
Listen I don't know why you're getting rude to me I said I think I know who you are?
0
reply
rux23uk
Badges: 6
Rep:
?
#17
Report 1 week ago
#17
(Original post by Anonymous)
When did you meet him and what age?

Well based on my post who do you think could be my soulmate? I dont believe in them but if you can choose one then who ?

The girl I wanted but fate ruined us. Or the girl I didnt like romantically but upon moving to her country, we got together.

I doubt the soulmates thing so if you can choose then who?
Man, I was so broken when I met him because I had bad timing with a guy I was in the same class with too.. We liked each other but at different times and we were sharing the same desk at school too. But he pushed his limits and I had to shut him down. Hence why I wasn't after a boyfriend so I would choose her, the girl you are with now. Because if there s no good timing, there can't be no relationship because constantly one of you won t like the other.. Or you will feel like it s like walking on hard rocks.

I ve had 2 relationships like that. None of them ended well. I met him at 16 I m 22 now
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#18
Report Thread starter 1 week ago
#18
(Original post by rux23uk)
Man, I was so broken when I met him because I had bad timing with a guy I was in the same class with too.. We liked each other but at different times and we were sharing the same desk at school too. But he pushed his limits and I had to shut him down. Hence why I wasn't after a boyfriend so I would choose her, the girl you are with now. Because if there s no good timing, there can't be no relationship because constantly one of you won t like the other.. Or you will feel like it s like walking on hard rocks.

I ve had 2 relationships like that. None of them ended well. I met him at 16 I m 22 now
Well, that's not true. The girl did try her best to sort out the issues. I was the one not willing to budge as I was really bitter.
I also had the feeling that I dont care I will find better girls as to me, she was the problem.
Now I know she wasn't the problem.

So the situation is different ..
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#19
Report Thread starter 1 week ago
#19
(Original post by Anonymous)
Listen I don't know why you're getting rude to me I said I think I know who you are?
If you make claims to know me then at least tell me who I am. Maybe i also know you then?
0
reply
rux23uk
Badges: 6
Rep:
?
#20
Report 1 week ago
#20
(Original post by Anonymous)
Well, that's not true. The girl did try her best to sort out the issues. I was the one not willing to budge as I was really bitter.
I also had the feeling that I dont care I will find better girls as to me, she was the problem.
Now I know she wasn't the problem.

So the situation is different ..
Ahh.. Then, why did you move?
0
reply
X

Quick Reply

Attached files
Write a reply...
Reply
new posts
Back
to top
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

Did you vote in the 2019 general election?

Yes (412)
43.78%
No (98)
10.41%
I'm not old enough (431)
45.8%

Watched Threads

View All