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Feel like sex isn't special to my boyfriend

My boyfriend is amazing... he's kind, caring, and everything I could have ever wished for in a man. We actually waited a while to have sex (4 months) because I wanted to feel 100% certain and comfortable and I think he also wanted to show he wasn't just in it for the sex. I've also had bad experiences in the past where I felt I gave it away too easily, so I wanted to build up my trust this time.

In the recent past (before my current boyfriend) I've had some amazing sex with some not so amazing guys... and I've become more and more adventurous over time. The first time I had sex with my current boyfriend it wasn't mind blowing and was probably the worst sex I've had for a while. There was no foreplay and we stayed in the missionary position... he had his eyes closed for most of it but eye contact is a big thing for me. It left me feeling a bit...meh, but I was confident that it would get better in time. Whereas for him, it was probably good sex...I've since learnt he's fairly inexperienced with one previous sexual partner and limited to 1 or 2 positions. I was actually happy with this as I wanted to teach him things.

Since then that's exactly what I've done, and we've introduced new positions etc to spice it up. However, one thing that now gets to me is that I find myself preferring missionary over everything else the more and more I'm falling for him. I didn't find it romantic to begin with (perhaps because we weren't fully comfortable with one another) but now I absolutely love it. I'm also now annoyed at myself for how much I tried to get away from it, and the fact that I was so adventurous with him so early on. So now I feel like he thinks that is my preference. He's more attentive now during sex and does give eye contact... but after we've done it (whichever position) he'll say 'that was fun'. But I see it as a bit more than fun and I'm not sure he does, although he does show that it's special in the moment. The other day I asked him what his favourite position is and well it wasn't missionary... it was one where we're not face to face and I got upset. He can be super romantic but I'm not sure if he feels he's making love to me or just having sex, and it makes me feel upset/offended.

Am I right to feel this way?!

Reply 1

pancakeloverrr

Him not preferring that position doesn't mean he loves you any less.

Next time, maybe open a discussion telling him how it felt nice/special (not just fun) for you and he might reciprocate and open up a bit

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