is it possible for an introvert to become extroverted? how? help! Watch

Anonymous #1
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Any introverts who with personal work became extroverted?
I struggle so much with making friends, and people aren't drawn to me because I give off boring-quiet-girl-vibes
any tips and tricks will be much appreciated!!
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kkboyk
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Any introverts who with personal work became extroverted?
I struggle so much with making friends, and people aren't drawn to me because I give off boring-quiet-girl-vibes
any tips and tricks will be much appreciated!!
Those qualities aren't what defines introversion. Most of the population have the wrong ideas about it. Best way to go about it is to learn how to start a conversation, maintain a conversation and connection (e.g. using social media to talk to them, occasionally meeting up to do activities). You'll have to show interest to the other person, mostly done by asking questions related to them.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by kkboyk)
Those qualities aren't what defines introversion. Most of the population have the wrong ideas about it. Best way to go about it is to learn how to start a conversation, maintain a conversation and connection (e.g. using social media to talk to them, occasionally meeting up to do activities). You'll have to show interest to the other person, mostly done by asking questions related to them.
I agree with you, but unfortunately, that's what people thought of me to begin with when I ask them about their first impression of me :/
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bubblecat
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i hate the stereotype that introverts are “boring” “quiet” and “have no friends” when this is the furthest thing from the truth. introverts recharge by being by themselves, extroverts recharge by being with others. thats literally the only differences.

i am very very introverted, but i have plenty of friends and can socialise for long periods of time just as easily as extroverts.

the problem isn’t due to being an introvert and wont be solved by forcing yourself to become an extrovert. being an introvert isn’t a bad thing and isn’t something that needs to be changed!

you just have to work on speaking up and putting yourself out there. try and find people with common interests.
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marinade
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No. It's one of the big five personality traits. As Brian Little says an extrovert can have 'free traits' and temporarily become more extroverted, perhaps even for a period of time or for a role. Introverts are overstimulated so recharge afterwards by being in quieter environments, often alone. There are actually documented differences between extroverts and introverts in terms of body language, verbal language and so on and this is a consequence of what it means to extrovert yourself! A third of the population are introverts, nothing wrong with them. Some are excellent at social gatherings.

In general society uses language like introvert, confidence and so on very widely as it's more socially acceptable than talking about other things such as mental health or other things. It's also very comforting and simplistic as some people are 'naturally good'. You hear this kind of complete nonsense very frequently in some workplaces and it's very damaging to society.

Nor does everyone necessarily like some talky people. You go around a social gathering and think wow that person is amazing and then later on you hear the murmurs and comments about how annoying that person was and how self absorbed they were. Even when there is a bias towards extroverts such at gatherings and interviews, this advantage doesn't necessarily last long as people realise if there isn't anything there below the surface.
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dankadank
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Any introverts who with personal work became extroverted?
I struggle so much with making friends, and people aren't drawn to me because I give off boring-quiet-girl-vibes
any tips and tricks will be much appreciated!!
I'm a non-drinker and I feel the pressure. I feel like the only way you can make friends is to go crazy on a night out and I'm not all about that. I have not made any friends ever since I started late September, and my parents seem quite concerned even though they're not pro drinking. Societies are paid and the ones that aren't paid are not that appealing to me. This leaves me basically as a shut-in. How the hell do I make friends without drinking or paying, because me being introverted isn't helping... It's like everyone in my course knew each other before they even met, like what am I supposed to do lmao?
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Igotbbcalevel
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loosen up. speak your mind
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mgi
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(Original post by marinade)
No. It's one of the big five personality traits. As Brian Little says an extrovert can have 'free traits' and temporarily become more extroverted, perhaps even for a period of time or for a role. Introverts are overstimulated so recharge afterwards by being in quieter environments, often alone. There are actually documented differences between extroverts and introverts in terms of body language, verbal language and so on and this is a consequence of what it means to extrovert yourself! A third of the population are introverts, nothing wrong with them. Some are excellent at social gatherings.

In general society uses language like introvert, confidence and so on very widely as it's more socially acceptable than talking about other things such as mental health or other things. It's also very comforting and simplistic as some people are 'naturally good'. You hear this kind of complete nonsense very frequently in some workplaces and it's very damaging to society.

Nor does everyone necessarily like some talky people. You go around a social gathering and think wow that person is amazing and then later on you hear the murmurs and comments about how annoying that person was and how self absorbed they were. Even when there is a bias towards extroverts such at gatherings and interviews, this advantage doesn't necessarily last long as people realise if there isn't anything there below the surface.
Goodness me! You are overthinking everything- and in a very negative way.
Welcome to the realities of life: you won't like everyone and not everyone will like you! People will definitely talk about you behind your back and there is nothing you can ever do to stop them; but why would that bother you? And why do you care? they are only do what you would do!- except you have really low self confidence!
So what you should be asking is : how can improve my self confidence? Find some hobbies and interests that involve social interaction such as dancing, bowling, joining a choir- its your life!
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mgi
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I agree with you, but unfortunately, that's what people thought of me to begin with when I ask them about their first impression of me :/
And why on earth do you care?
What is your impression of yourself? -ask that question- it is a more interesting question for you!
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marinade
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(Original post by mgi)
Goodness me! You are overthinking everything- and in a very negative way.
Welcome to the realities of life: you won't like everyone and not everyone will like you! People will definitely talk about you behind your back and there is nothing you can ever do to stop them; but why would that bother you? And why do you care? they are only do what you would do!- except you have really low self confidence!
So what you should be asking is : how can improve my self confidence? Find some hobbies and interests that involve social interaction such as dancing, bowling, joining a choir- its your life!
If only life were that simple. If it were large sections of this forum - mental health, advice on every day issues, chat, would be fairly empty. The world would also be full of people, even more people being complete arses to other people. Hurray. What even is self confidence?

Being very confident and not caring what anyone else thinks may have it's positives. Unfortunately not everyone else can be like that, nor would you want to live in a world like that.
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kkboyk
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(Original post by Igotbbcalevel)
loosen up. speak your mind
Always best to consider what you say before speaking your mind, especially without reading the mood and saying something offensive.
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UlfaRed
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Any introverts who with personal work became extroverted?
I struggle so much with making friends, and people aren't drawn to me because I give off boring-quiet-girl-vibes
any tips and tricks will be much appreciated!!
I used to be extremely introverted, almost bordering on depressed loner girl, but now I feel like I am morphing into a quasi extrovert almost? Like I am a lot more confident, I speak to a lot more people now and I just stopped caring what people think. Easier said than done, I know! I think practising helps a lot. This may sound strange but speaking to people on omegle and online helped with that whole thing. I used to think I was very boring but that was only because I felt like I gave off that vibe to people. Now, I think I am a lot more confident. Honestly its all about the people you surround yourself with- do they drag you down or pick you up? For me, learning to smile was a big factor in talking to people- I never used to smile or make eye contact but now that I do people say I am a lot more approachable and confident.

All things considered, remember there is nothing wrong with being an introvert. Even though I think I'm turning slightly more extroverted like I socialise more etc, I can be quite introverted and need my own space and not talk to people at times. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that! The important thing is to be yourself and the making friends thing will become easier, trust me. I still feel like a boring quiet girl too- honestly, just own it! People who label you as boring clearly know nothing and are boring themselves. Don't take any notice. Be yourself! xx
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mgi
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Well said.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by UlfaRed)
I used to be extremely introverted, almost bordering on depressed loner girl, but now I feel like I am morphing into a quasi extrovert almost? Like I am a lot more confident, I speak to a lot more people now and I just stopped caring what people think. Easier said than done, I know! I think practising helps a lot. This may sound strange but speaking to people on omegle and online helped with that whole thing. I used to think I was very boring but that was only because I felt like I gave off that vibe to people. Now, I think I am a lot more confident. Honestly its all about the people you surround yourself with- do they drag you down or pick you up? For me, learning to smile was a big factor in talking to people- I never used to smile or make eye contact but now that I do people say I am a lot more approachable and confident.

All things considered, remember there is nothing wrong with being an introvert. Even though I think I'm turning slightly more extroverted like I socialise more etc, I can be quite introverted and need my own space and not talk to people at times. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that! The important thing is to be yourself and the making friends thing will become easier, trust me. I still feel like a boring quiet girl too- honestly, just own it! People who label you as boring clearly know nothing and are boring themselves. Don't take any notice. Be yourself! xx
Thank you so much <3 you just gave me the hope I needed
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username4750032
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Embrace what you are and play to your strengths. If you are introverted, then make it work for you.
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AM_TSR
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Stop overthinking things. Worked for me
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xozxexo
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Meeee!!!
I wouldn't class myself as an extrovert because you will literally never catch me in a lot of social situations such as parties but im working on them

I used to be a really shy timid kid who never really spoke and was quiet. I've just kinda grow into myself, and just generally have become more confident and loud when i am with the people i know well. To make friends i would try and talk to people who your friends also hang out with.

I still gravitate towards the quieter ones but that's mainly because loud people actually just annoy the **** out of me after a while.

I also recommend getting a job in retail. Not so much a one on one customer based environment but rather a regular store like wilko or b&m where you can interact with customers at the check out but you don't need to approach them when they're on the shop floor.
Since having my job I've found doing small talk much more naturally like for example if it was raining outside and my store was in a shopping centre I would ask if they know if its still raining (saying how i finish soon and don't want to get soaked) or how are the roads etc or if they have items and it'd around Christmas ask if they're doing their Christmas shopping and how they're finding it.

It doesn't take much at all and it's easy to judge which customers will be up for a conversation and you will get a huge confidence boost from it. At lot of people are actually very funny and they will actually make your day.

I think you just need to become more approachable, let people know you're kind and willing to talk and when you're with them just show interest and curiosity and you will be surprised on how included and happy you feel when you make the effort to put yourself out there
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