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I dropped out of uni and now i feel worse than ever.

I feel like i regret my decision of leaving university and i'm feeling so lost and hopeless. I keep contradicting myself because whenever i was in my dorm room all i wanted to do was come home but now i'm home i just want to be back at uni. I've completely lost who i am and i'm no longer the happy, bubbly person i once was, my flatmates never saw the true me. I just want to turn back time and wish i never made the decision to go to university but i felt so pressurised to go because everyone was so proud of me and yes at that time i was proud of myself and seemed to go with the flow of absolutely everything and i thought uni was what i wanted however when i look back now i chose to go to college instead of doing sixth form because i couldn't handle the pressure. I had a few friends from home that went to the same uni and was in the same accommodation complex, i even had my best friend on the same course as me so it's not as if i had no one and had to start from scratch. My happiness started deteriorating instantly from the day i moved in and i feel like i should've got out there sooner than i did but i really thought it was just homesickness and i would get over it, i lasted 11 weeks. All my friendships seem to be breaking apart because i'm stuck in a loop hole i can't get out of. I thought coming home would lift my mood but i'm still in the same habits where i just sleep all the time and lock myself away because i hate what i've become. Ugh just don't know what i'm doing with myself, i was so happy with what i had before and now i feel like my life has been ripped away from me, i hate myself.
Original post by Anonymous
I feel like i regret my decision of leaving university and i'm feeling so lost and hopeless. I keep contradicting myself because whenever i was in my dorm room all i wanted to do was come home but now i'm home i just want to be back at uni. I've completely lost who i am and i'm no longer the happy, bubbly person i once was, my flatmates never saw the true me. I just want to turn back time and wish i never made the decision to go to university but i felt so pressurised to go because everyone was so proud of me and yes at that time i was proud of myself and seemed to go with the flow of absolutely everything and i thought uni was what i wanted however when i look back now i chose to go to college instead of doing sixth form because i couldn't handle the pressure. I had a few friends from home that went to the same uni and was in the same accommodation complex, i even had my best friend on the same course as me so it's not as if i had no one and had to start from scratch. My happiness started deteriorating instantly from the day i moved in and i feel like i should've got out there sooner than i did but i really thought it was just homesickness and i would get over it, i lasted 11 weeks. All my friendships seem to be breaking apart because i'm stuck in a loop hole i can't get out of. I thought coming home would lift my mood but i'm still in the same habits where i just sleep all the time and lock myself away because i hate what i've become. Ugh just don't know what i'm doing with myself, i was so happy with what i had before and now i feel like my life has been ripped away from me, i hate myself.

Hey, I'm sorry you feel this way but i can assure you you're probably not the only one that feels this lost. I dropped out of uni, except i was still living at home, and felt super lost too but realised i can either sit around and feel sorry for myself for feeling this way or get up and use the rest of they year i have before i go back to do something. i advise you to try looking for a job or something to do to get our mind off it all. You might feel as though your missing out or that you'll be behind all your friends but tbh thats not the case. just use this time to work on yourself instead of dwelling on the decision you made, you can always go back to uni no matter how old you are, you have lots of time trust me. Hope this helps and just know your life isnt ripped away from you because you made a decision that will probably benefit you in the long run. ; )
Reply 2
Original post by Anonymous
I feel like i regret my decision of leaving university and i'm feeling so lost and hopeless. I keep contradicting myself because whenever i was in my dorm room all i wanted to do was come home but now i'm home i just want to be back at uni. I've completely lost who i am and i'm no longer the happy, bubbly person i once was, my flatmates never saw the true me. I just want to turn back time and wish i never made the decision to go to university but i felt so pressurised to go because everyone was so proud of me and yes at that time i was proud of myself and seemed to go with the flow of absolutely everything and i thought uni was what i wanted however when i look back now i chose to go to college instead of doing sixth form because i couldn't handle the pressure. I had a few friends from home that went to the same uni and was in the same accommodation complex, i even had my best friend on the same course as me so it's not as if i had no one and had to start from scratch. My happiness started deteriorating instantly from the day i moved in and i feel like i should've got out there sooner than i did but i really thought it was just homesickness and i would get over it, i lasted 11 weeks. All my friendships seem to be breaking apart because i'm stuck in a loop hole i can't get out of. I thought coming home would lift my mood but i'm still in the same habits where i just sleep all the time and lock myself away because i hate what i've become. Ugh just don't know what i'm doing with myself, i was so happy with what i had before and now i feel like my life has been ripped away from me, i hate myself.

Hey. Don’t ever make a decision because someone else would want you to. A lot of the time, even when it may not seem like it, most people in university are confused anyways. If you regret your decision maybe speak to the university and see what your options are? You’re running your own race there’s more than enough time to figure it out. I hope you’re okay. Try & speak to someone if you can, it may help. Do things you enjoy, have a little fun, clear your head and start again if you need to. True friendships go through ups and downs sometimes, don’t worry about losing them x
Original post by Anonymous
I feel like i regret my decision of leaving university and i'm feeling so lost and hopeless. I keep contradicting myself because whenever i was in my dorm room all i wanted to do was come home but now i'm home i just want to be back at uni. I've completely lost who i am and i'm no longer the happy, bubbly person i once was, my flatmates never saw the true me. I just want to turn back time and wish i never made the decision to go to university but i felt so pressurised to go because everyone was so proud of me and yes at that time i was proud of myself and seemed to go with the flow of absolutely everything and i thought uni was what i wanted however when i look back now i chose to go to college instead of doing sixth form because i couldn't handle the pressure. I had a few friends from home that went to the same uni and was in the same accommodation complex, i even had my best friend on the same course as me so it's not as if i had no one and had to start from scratch. My happiness started deteriorating instantly from the day i moved in and i feel like i should've got out there sooner than i did but i really thought it was just homesickness and i would get over it, i lasted 11 weeks. All my friendships seem to be breaking apart because i'm stuck in a loop hole i can't get out of. I thought coming home would lift my mood but i'm still in the same habits where i just sleep all the time and lock myself away because i hate what i've become. Ugh just don't know what i'm doing with myself, i was so happy with what i had before and now i feel like my life has been ripped away from me, i hate myself.

Hiya, I firstly wanted to say that it's okay to feel totally lost and confused and fine if you don't know what you want to do or where you want to be. I relate to you as I also dropped out of uni and had no idea what to do. I also felt like going to uni was the 'proper' thing to do but when I got there I struggled with homesickness, anxiety and lack of motivation, But universities aren't going anywhere, there's nothing stopping you going back to uni in a year or in several years.

I think the first step may be to visit a doctor and talk to them about how you're feeling as you mentioned you were feeling really down.

Then you can start looking at the different areas of your life, one at a time or it's so overwhelming. Jobs, social life, self care, hobbies. Chip away at things bit-by-bit. For me it was a case of getting my anxiety under control, then I got a temporary work placement. It wasn't a job I was super passionate but it gave me enough money to not have to worry about rent. In my spare time I firstly looked at just relaxing. I don't know if you feel this too but I've always felt like I should be doing something at all times to improve myself, gain skills, do things that make me look clever or cultured and more employable. So learning to just...chill. And not feel guilty or down, just relaxed.

In terms of family and friends, you can rebuild those relationships or build new ones. When you feel ready, perhaps tell them how you've been feeling and good friends will try to understand and will support you. My final advice would be trying to find something you enjoy doing or learning about without the pressure of school or anything. Personally I found I enjoy fitness and learning about it and it's given me a nudge to take steps to exploring a career down the fitness route.

Don't give up hope :smile: I left school with this expectation that things would slot into place, I'd get a degree, find a career I was passionate about, my social and love life would follow in course but....life isn't like that. Honestly, a year ago I was crying my eyes out in an anxiety fuelled existential crisis because I had no passions and was terrified of being stuck in a dead end job I hated and felt doomed to a future of simultaneously being bored and stressed, a drop out with so much potential she was letting go to waste. But today I feel like a different person, I have things I want to try, things I enjoy doing. Dropping out of uni wasn't the end of the world, it's just a different route. Have the courage to reach out to your doctor and family/friends, show yourself some love and stop beating yourself up and get through each day and eventually you'll see some changes
Reply 4
Original post by Anonymous
Hey, I'm sorry you feel this way but i can assure you you're probably not the only one that feels this lost. I dropped out of uni, except i was still living at home, and felt super lost too but realised i can either sit around and feel sorry for myself for feeling this way or get up and use the rest of they year i have before i go back to do something. i advise you to try looking for a job or something to do to get our mind off it all. You might feel as though your missing out or that you'll be behind all your friends but tbh thats not the case. just use this time to work on yourself instead of dwelling on the decision you made, you can always go back to uni no matter how old you are, you have lots of time trust me. Hope this helps and just know your life isnt ripped away from you because you made a decision that will probably benefit you in the long run. ; )

I think the start of all my problems was moving out of home when I knew I wasn’t ready and I wasn’t too sure on the course and I wish I had the advice my friend told me where one of her family members said to her don’t go to university unless you’re really set on the course. I realised the course is never what I wanted to do but now I’m pretty much scarred from it. I do have a job but I’m in the process of trying to sort it out but that’s stressing me out too, I’ve seemed to just crumble and I’m not able to do anything. I’m really hoping i can start feeling better because I know this isn’t me I just get really scared to go outside my house because so many people knew I went off to uni and I seemed so excited for it, I get so anxious when someone asks me how is uni going, trying to stay strong :smile:
Reply 5
Original post by Embtp
Hey. Don’t ever make a decision because someone else would want you to. A lot of the time, even when it may not seem like it, most people in university are confused anyways. If you regret your decision maybe speak to the university and see what your options are? You’re running your own race there’s more than enough time to figure it out. I hope you’re okay. Try & speak to someone if you can, it may help. Do things you enjoy, have a little fun, clear your head and start again if you need to. True friendships go through ups and downs sometimes, don’t worry about losing them x

I think I only realised it wasn’t really my decision when I actually got up there and it sucks when you realise too late, it’s got me in a very strange place which I’m trying to get myself out of x
Original post by Anonymous
I think the start of all my problems was moving out of home when I knew I wasn’t ready and I wasn’t too sure on the course and I wish I had the advice my friend told me where one of her family members said to her don’t go to university unless you’re really set on the course. I realised the course is never what I wanted to do but now I’m pretty much scarred from it. I do have a job but I’m in the process of trying to sort it out but that’s stressing me out too, I’ve seemed to just crumble and I’m not able to do anything. I’m really hoping i can start feeling better because I know this isn’t me I just get really scared to go outside my house because so many people knew I went off to uni and I seemed so excited for it, I get so anxious when someone asks me how is uni going, trying to stay strong :smile:

yeah i wish someone had told me the same before i'd started the course that i'd dropped out from. I had similar experience, i hated seeing ppl that went to the same college as me when i was out because they'd always ask what i was doing and why i wasnt at uni and i would just get really anxious and then dwell on the idea of who theyre going to tell that i left too. But after a while you'll get over it and realise its not their choice its your so who really cares what they think. just gotta focus on yourself and do you
Reply 7
Original post by Anonymous
yeah i wish someone had told me the same before i'd started the course that i'd dropped out from. I had similar experience, i hated seeing ppl that went to the same college as me when i was out because they'd always ask what i was doing and why i wasnt at uni and i would just get really anxious and then dwell on the idea of who theyre going to tell that i left too. But after a while you'll get over it and realise its not their choice its your so who really cares what they think. just gotta focus on yourself and do you

I literally feel like my life stopped September 14th, haven’t really enjoyed anything since then, I found myself literally getting myself drunk to find some sort of enjoyment, wish the course was right cause everything else was perfect but I couldn’t stay for the social life, just want to get over this but i know it takes time. Just kind of frustrated with myself because I feel like 16 year old me was wiser than the 18 year old me, I said I wouldn’t go to uni because I knew I wouldn’t be able to handle it and then I guess my tutor gave me so much hope which led me to the idea of uni but I wasn’t really told at what it was really like, I think I forgot that I had to move out and try and do absolutely everything myself and it just broke me because it all happened at once
Original post by Anonymous #1
I literally feel like my life stopped September 14th, haven’t really enjoyed anything since then, I found myself literally getting myself drunk to find some sort of enjoyment, wish the course was right cause everything else was perfect but I couldn’t stay for the social life, just want to get over this but i know it takes time. Just kind of frustrated with myself because I feel like 16 year old me was wiser than the 18 year old me, I said I wouldn’t go to uni because I knew I wouldn’t be able to handle it and then I guess my tutor gave me so much hope which led me to the idea of uni but I wasn’t really told at what it was really like, I think I forgot that I had to move out and try and do absolutely everything myself and it just broke me because it all happened at once

Hey, I know this post is 4 years old but I’m going through a similar thing and wondered if you managed to sort everything out and doing okay now
Reply 9
Original post by Anonymous #3
Hey, I know this post is 4 years old but I’m going through a similar thing and wondered if you managed to sort everything out and doing okay now

Hey! Not a problem! Good to see a reply to this status as I logged in a week ago on a whim after about 3 years! I’m great now. Life worked out. I came back home and must admit I did have a horrible few months but I pushed myself to work and managed to work through it. Started and finished an apprenticeship and do full time work now. I slowly started finding happiness in things and I just went with the flow, things got better. Not sure what your position is, if you have left uni or stayed?
Original post by Anonymous #1
Hey! Not a problem! Good to see a reply to this status as I logged in a week ago on a whim after about 3 years! I’m great now. Life worked out. I came back home and must admit I did have a horrible few months but I pushed myself to work and managed to work through it. Started and finished an apprenticeship and do full time work now. I slowly started finding happiness in things and I just went with the flow, things got better. Not sure what your position is, if you have left uni or stayed?

Hi there,

I just want to say that I'm so glad that things worked out! I think that the period after leaving university (not matter the circumstances) is full of challenges. Good luck for the future 🙂

All the best,
Jaz - Cardiff student rep
Original post by Anonymous #1
Hey! Not a problem! Good to see a reply to this status as I logged in a week ago on a whim after about 3 years! I’m great now. Life worked out. I came back home and must admit I did have a horrible few months but I pushed myself to work and managed to work through it. Started and finished an apprenticeship and do full time work now. I slowly started finding happiness in things and I just went with the flow, things got better. Not sure what your position is, if you have left uni or stayed?

That is great to hear, it’s all very daunting not knowing about the future. I dropped out of uni 8 months ago and going through an on and off rough patch
Reply 12
Original post by Anonymous #3
That is great to hear, it’s all very daunting not knowing about the future. I dropped out of uni 8 months ago and going through an on and off rough patch

It is so scary and the worst thing is thinking about what you could’ve had (which I did for months myself) but i slowly got over the what ifs and started fresh.
Original post by Anonymous #1
It is so scary and the worst thing is thinking about what you could’ve had (which I did for months myself) but i slowly got over the what ifs and started fresh.

For sure, I’m still thinking like that sometimes but gradually I’m realising if i think like that about it I’ll never move on in life.

This probably sounds silly but did you manage to make friends on an apprenticeship? Just missing uni friends
Reply 14
Original post by Anonymous #3
For sure, I’m still thinking like that sometimes but gradually I’m realising if i think like that about it I’ll never move on in life.

This probably sounds silly but did you manage to make friends on an apprenticeship? Just missing uni friends

Ahh I’m so sorry, I forgot to reply to this!

I’m glad you’re realising because that’s the start of things being a lot clearer.

I must admit the apprenticeship I did there were a lot of older people, it depends what you do/where you go. Do you have any friends that stayed home and didn’t go to uni?
Original post by Anonymous #1
Ahh I’m so sorry, I forgot to reply to this!

I’m glad you’re realising because that’s the start of things being a lot clearer.

I must admit the apprenticeship I did there were a lot of older people, it depends what you do/where you go. Do you have any friends that stayed home and didn’t go to uni?

No worries!

All of my friends from school went to uni and only one is an hour away- so my social life kinda sucks rn. Was hoping theres chance to make more friends during an apprenticeship
Reply 16
Original post by Anonymous #3
No worries!

All of my friends from school went to uni and only one is an hour away- so my social life kinda sucks rn. Was hoping theres chance to make more friends during an apprenticeship

Ah I see. I only had one friend back home but that really helped, i did also meet my boyfriend when I came home so you never know what will happen. A lot of apprenticeships do usually have a few start at the same time but the one I did was only me! My friend recently started an apprenticeship and she’s managed to meet plenty of people.

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