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Am I right to be so cross? watch

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    (Original post by Ataloss)
    were you not invited to the family celebration?
    I was, but have no transport.
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    I can understand what a lot of people are saying, though. But, it's part of our 'tradition'. Grah. I'm cross half the food will likely go to waste too, because we're on holiday all next week and we can't really take it with us! It's not stuff my mum likes or would be able to use. Things like italen ham and stuff, and garlicy stuff that she doesn't like.
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    If his brother's gf was invited then how come you weren't? Maybe if you and his family don't get on you feel upset because it feels that he ditched you for them (which he really didn't do intentionally)
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    I can imagine you being slightly unamused at it, as at the end of the day you made plans and he's let you down in that sense. But I dont really think theres any need to be fuming over it, maybe Id be slightly annoyed if it was an actual year anniversary, but having half year one's is slightly silly and reminds me of being in junior school. Also, you have to try and look at it from an outsiders point of view, imagine its one of your friends in this situation. Im assuming he doesnt see his brother too often so its not like he let you down in favour of a night at the pub with his mates or anything, so I dont think it says much about your boyfriend, its just unfortunate that this family day thing was on the day you wanted to plan something!
    And can we consider that Im sure his family would have been a whole lot more pissed off with him than you if he had let them down for a 2 years and 6 month anniversary!
    Also, generally people like to make a big deal out of anniversaries, or they dont.. and I think after 2 years alot of people dont count to the day how long they've been together so he quite probably doesnt even realise what day it is and how much it botheres you. Just tell him how you feel and Im sure he'll understand and try and make it up to you somehow!
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    (Original post by Spotty Dog)
    I was, but have no transport.
    Forgive me - for I am a little tired and have a headache - but you had enough money to spend on a lavish picnic but not on a bus/taxi to travel to his house? Was there no-one that could give you a lift or perhaps pick he could have picked you up on the way back from the golf course?

    If you were so desperate to spend time with your boyfriend on your anniversary I would have thought one of these may have been possible. I am not sure he is entirely to blame here if at all. Sorry.
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    Wouldn't your bf pick you up or something?
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    You have a right to be mad at him for forgetting if you celebrate 6 month checkpoints. But if spending time with him meant so much to you, why didn't you just tell him what day it was?
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    (Original post by ally.pants)
    If his brother's gf was invited then how come you weren't? Maybe if you and his family don't get on you feel upset because it feels that he ditched you for them (which he really didn't do intentionally)
    I was - But I was at work. And we get on really well, actually.

    (Original post by Ataloss)
    Forgive me - for I am a little tired and have a headache - but you had enough money to spend on a lavish picnic but not on a bus/taxi to travel to his house? Was there no-one that could give you a lift or perhaps pick he could have picked you up on the way back from the golf course?
    I live in the rural backend of nowhere, hun. :-P We have a bus a day each way mon-sat, and nothing on sundays. The taxi would be coming up for a good £30 easily, and I hadn't budgeted for this and thus haven't got that kind of money left over. No one was home at the time to give me a lift - We have one working, roa legal car between us all and mum was at the gym. And the route from the golf to his would have been a like.. 20 mile or so diversion to pick me up (like three points of a triangle), and at totally the wrong time of day - He finished golf around 12:30, and I finished work at 4.

    (Original post by ally.pants)
    Wouldn't your bf pick you up or something?
    I asked, but he said no because of fuel (and then offered me fuel money if I coul use my mums car!!)
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    If you celebrate 6 monthlies, but you missed one because you were in hospital, then you've only celebrated one. That hardly makes it a tradition. The fact that his brother's home from America, after a presumably long time, suggests that his mind will be caught up in that, and you haven't mentioned anything to him about the plans. It's understandable for you to be upset, because you've put a lot of work into the plans and you're missing out on him, but you can't be angry at him.

    Although, having said that, it does seem a little strange for him to not top up his car - maybe he's not got enough fuel to go to the garage?
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    I'd be pretty mad actually Tell him you had something planned for the two of you and you're really upset.
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    Maybe he thought you'd forgotten about this ever-so-special anniversary?

    Six months and eighteen months are sort of milestones. I wouldn't say thirty months was. Maybe, since you didnt bother mentioning that it was your half anniversary, he presumed that you thought thirty months wasn't really a big deal, and that you had no plans.

    Really, would it have killed you to say, "oh, it's our anniversary though, and I've made plans"? That way, you still keep the mystery since he doesn't know what you've planned, and he might decide to come home earlier rather than hang about at the house.
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    (Original post by Spotty Dog)
    I can understand what a lot of people are saying, though. But, it's part of our 'tradition'. Grah. I'm cross half the food will likely go to waste too, because we're on holiday all next week and we can't really take it with us! It's not stuff my mum likes or would be able to use. Things like italen ham and stuff, and garlicy stuff that she doesn't like.
    tbh I'd ignore everyone's comments about a 6 month point not being an anniversarry or being weird cos it's your relationship and your choice. But if he didn't know that you had something planned, in terms of going out and spending a lot of money on it all and having it in the works for so long, then I don't think you have AS MUCH a right to be annoyed at him, or any. I can understand you being pissed at the fact that you went through all the effort and it's not worked out, but it's not his fault really if he wanted to spend some time with his family, can't you do it like tomorrow or before you go on holiday? It wont be your actual 6months point anniversarry but it will still be nice to use all the ideas and food you had and you'll be together so that's all that matters really.
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    Oh dear. Cheer up
    Why not surprise him when he gets home tomorrow with a picnic lunch? (you can even do it indoors if the weather is bad!)
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    (Original post by FluffyLion)
    If you celebrate 6 monthlies, but you missed one because you were in hospital, then you've only celebrated one. That hardly makes it a tradition.
    This doesn't make any sense. o.o; firstly, I meant that we celebrate big time (like big plans) every six months, and do something every month (like a meal out/cinema etc) every month bar one - the one I was in hospital for. And even if I missed one of the six month celebrations, that would still leave 4 others? (2 and a half years)
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    Honestly - no.

    I think you need to appreciate that his family are very important and that half anniversaries are complete *******s. And i am guessing he has also has no clue what you were planning so really I just think you need to calm down and do it another night
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    (Original post by Spotty Dog)
    I asked, but he said no because of fuel (and then offered me fuel money if I coul use my mums car!!)
    Now I can see why you might be a little cross about that.
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    (Original post by ally.pants)
    Oh dear. Cheer up
    Why not surprise him when he gets home tomorrow with a picnic lunch? (you can even do it indoors if the weather is bad!)
    This idea has cheered me up a little. (so stressed I'm not even thinking as logically as this!) Thank you (and to someone else who I'm sure suggested it but now can't find that post. x.x)

    Although it means tearing him away from his anal-rentative packing for a few days holiay, for which he has already made numerous lists. (Things I need, things he needs, things we might need if it fits, things that we need but don't need to go in the suitcase.... It goes on, and it driving me mad! I just sling things in a case and go!!)
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    (Original post by Spotty Dog)
    This doesn't make any sense. o.o; firstly, I meant that we celebrate big time (like big plans) every six months, and do something every month (like a meal out/cinema etc) every month bar one - the one I was in hospital for. And even if I missed one of the six month celebrations, that would still leave 4 others? (2 and a half years)
    I think she meant that if you'd missed one of the sixth monthly anniversaries, then your boyfriend could have interpreted it as "oh, we celebrated our first six months, and every YEAR after that". So if you'd missed the 18 month one, you'd actually only celebrated six months, a year and two years.
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    I think people who are saying half-year anniversaries are a waste of time are talking crap. If a couple want to celebrate every 6 months they can bloody well do so. It's not your place to criticise them for it, to be frank.
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    Joanna May may (heh) have a point - did he know YOU knew it was your 2.5 year anniversary today?
 
 
 
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