Feeling low

I'm not sure if it's just a case of SAD because it's started in the last couple of months, but I've been feeling pretty low recently.

I had my 6 weeks of therapy and after opening up about everything, opening old wounds, it gets cut off because of the fab mental health support the NHS offers. /s I think that's been a big factor in feeling so crap right now.

I'm feeling more sensitive to stress. The slightest thing/rude remark makes me feel so anxious and upset. I don't have thick skin like everyone else seems to have. Work has been stressful recently. My manager is being pretty unfair to me right now too but I don't feel there's anything I can do about it. I'm certainly not confident enough to say anything.

I have such poor self esteem that people walk all over me and I can't magic self esteem and value out of mid air, though I have applied for a self esteem course. I still don't think it'll make much of a difference because you can't just retrain what you've been brought up to be like.

The stress has triggered my health issues so I'm not doing well physically. I am just too tired to do anything, partly because of unexplained illness (possible bowel disease) and partly because I'm feeling so low. I already have chronic fatigue.

Everyone seems to be so social and they get along well and I'm always the quiet outcast.

I really don't like this life anymore. It's just work, work, work amongst some horribly rude/nasty people. I don't want to spend the rest of my life living like this. Our entire lives are just focused on studying to get a job that most of us probably won't like doing anyway or it'll have ****ty people there who make the job unbearable. I just feel like an undervalued work horse that's dispensable.
I don't have the confidence or self worth to do things I'd really love to do (travelling etc.). And if there's something I want to do, my health gets in the way. I just can't win and I'm so fed up.

Hi there,

I'm really sorry to hear about your situation. Individually the problems you've listed can be tough to deal with but I can imagine all at once is quite difficult to deal with.

I have a few bits of advice to give, hopefully they help.

- Regarding the therapy sessions; If you speak to your GP they should be able to offer more advice about this. Additionally some jobs are able to offer mental health support or a counselor. It does depend on where you work however they may be able to provide some sessions.

- If you aren't feeling comfortable in work and the route cause is your manager then you could speak to your deputy or HR in order to give them the information and to set up a meeting for you to chat about it. A tip would be if you aren't the best at communicating your emotions in a way that others can understand then write up how you wish to say it and bring that to the meeting to keep you on the right path.

- One final piece of advice is to find other activities outside of work where you can mingle with others or simply just relax. Fill your additional time with hobbies that help build your confidence, that could be the gym, poetry clubs and the self-esteem class you mentioned etc.

I hope even one piece of advice I've given is useful to you, best of luck to you and remember to always take care of yourself.

As my fiancée's mother says "Your health is your wealth."

Patrick

I am sorry to hear you're struggling. Are you getting any help for the physical health issues? When you say you can't just retrain how you've been brought up, what do you mean? Were there traumatic things in your childhood? It might be worth speaking to someone about that if that is the case. You don't need to go super in depth at first, but it might help if you get to the root of the issue.

trust me when i say that you're not alone in this. <3 i feel like everyone else can brush small things off, but i can't, i just can't. the smallest perceived piece of negativity can completely destroy me and anxiety is ruining my life. but i've made it this far and so have you, and that has to mean something. you are worth something, and you can be great. hang in there xx

here's a quote by morgan harper nichols that spoke to me… i hope it speaks to you too. :-)

when you start to feel
like things should have
been better this year,
remember the mountains and valleys
that got you here
they are not accidents
and those moments weren't in vain
you are not the same
you have grown and you are growing
you are breathing, you are living.
you are wrapped in
endless
boundless
grace.
and things will get better.
there is more to you than yesterday.
-mhn

Thank-you for your help Patrick, it means a lot.
I haven't really had the time or energy to dedicate to any hobbies so maybe there's a bit of burn-out and frustration fuelling how I'm feeling. But then I don't feel up to or feel I have time to spend on them. I'll be seeing a doctor soon. I have a week off next week though and will hopefully submit my assignment early before a two week break from uni so maybe that'll help!

I've seen a doctor, waiting on test results. Seeing a doctor again next week as I've also been getting vertigo really bad (might be migraine related), but this bowel problem keeps happening and is making me so exhausted every time it happens, it's making me miserable.

Yes, I've been through a lot of trauma throughout my life and have been mistreated by many people. My low self esteem stems from an emotionally abusive father and has led me down a path of constant abuse from others. I have been completely unaware of how much my issues stem from a low self esteem. It was only when I had those 6 weeks of therapy that I realised this, but that ended a couple of weeks ago, just as I felt I was making some kind of progress. I am going to ask if I can be put back on the register to see my counsellor again but that may take almost a year to get again. But right now, I have been left to my own devices, open wounds with no way of coping with the emotional turmoil.

I'm glad I'm not alone in feeling like this, though it sucks to be feeling like this! Thanks for your kind words. <3

Thank-you for your help Patrick, it means a lot.
I haven't really had the time or energy to dedicate to any hobbies so maybe there's a bit of burn-out and frustration fuelling how I'm feeling. But then I don't feel up to or feel I have time to spend on them. I'll be seeing a doctor soon. I have a week off next week though and will hopefully submit my assignment early before a two week break from uni so maybe that'll help!

I've seen a doctor, waiting on test results. Seeing a doctor again next week as I've also been getting vertigo really bad (might be migraine related), but this bowel problem keeps happening and is making me so exhausted every time it happens, it's making me miserable.

Yes, I've been through a lot of trauma throughout my life and have been mistreated by many people. My low self esteem stems from an emotionally abusive father and has led me down a path of constant abuse from others. I have been completely unaware of how much my issues stem from a low self esteem. It was only when I had those 6 weeks of therapy that I realised this, but that ended a couple of weeks ago, just as I felt I was making some kind of progress. I am going to ask if I can be put back on the register to see my counsellor again but that may take almost a year to get again. But right now, I have been left to my own devices, open wounds with no way of coping with the emotional turmoil.

I'm glad I'm not alone in feeling like this, though it sucks to be feeling like this! Thanks for your kind words. <3