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    (Original post by Sushie)
    I feel like a jackass for posting in the LDR thread, but I just have a quick question. Would you consider me going to UCL and my boyfriend going to Imperial a "long distance"? And I don't mean the same type of distance as when you live hours, maybe even countries away like many of you deal with, but the whole two different universities, two different lives-aspect. Would you bother to worry at all? I'm not sure if it is going to or should be an issue or not.
    I can sort of see your point of view. But think of it this way: say you were both at UCL, for example, and doing different courses/living in different halls etc. I think you'd still be living pretty separate lives even at the same uni :p: Communication is the key, as always, in making a success of ANY relationship, regardless of whether you live in the same house or in different countries.
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    (Original post by princess_sue)
    OP, if you think about the Uni year - its not even a year. He will be home for christmas which is couple of months later after he starts. Then easter and then before you know it, he will be finished. I wouldnt worry about it too much, seems like you love each other a lot so I would just keep your head high, and trust that he loves enough to be faithful.

    Thanks, yeah it's just getting through the inbetween bits you know. Although what you've said has actually made me think about it more that it's not such of a big deal. I guess if I was going to uni too then I wouldn't feel so down about it all, I just feel sort of left behind. Thanks for the advice.
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    (Original post by Angelil)
    I can sort of see your point of view. But think of it this way: say you were both at UCL, for example, and doing different courses/living in different halls etc. I think you'd still be living pretty separate lives even at the same uni :p: Communication is the key, as always, in making a success of ANY relationship, regardless of whether you live in the same house or in different countries.
    Thanks, and you're right, I hadn't thought of it that way. We'll make it work.
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    Hmm, Chris has been away at college, but was coming back fairly regularly. Now his workload has increased and I haven't got to see him in over 2 months
    I tend to have the sort of brain that almost forgets things that are not there at the moment, for example, if someone goes away, then they are not in the forefront of my mind until they return.
    I don't mean this in a bad way, I'm not saying that I forget all about people and don't miss them, but they fade slightly from my general thoughts.
    So, lately I've been feeling a bit insecure about things (as I usually do when Chris is away), however, that is now coupled with my slight depressive tendancy at the moment, which makes it much worse. I'm now worrying about everything, and especially my relationship.
    Generally I have a buzz of anxiety in the background at the moment, which makes me almost scared about the future.
    I guess this is not really caused by my LDR, though it is impacting on it, and also (to an extent) a LDR is not really the best relationship for me while I am feeling this way.
    I don't know what I want or how I feel, I'm so confused, but I do know that when I see Chris again it'll all be okay and I'll wonder what I was worrying about.
    Hmm...I don't know that this makes a lot of sense, or whether it should be posted here, but I needed to get it out anyway..
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    (Original post by Sushie)
    I feel like a jackass for posting in the LDR thread, but I just have a quick question. Would you consider me going to UCL and my boyfriend going to Imperial a "long distance"? And I don't mean the same type of distance as when you live hours, maybe even countries away like many of you deal with, but the whole two different universities, two different lives-aspect. Would you bother to worry at all? I'm not sure if it is going to or should be an issue or not.
    lol answer=no. I'm doing the same but with the girl at KCL. Different lives is good too.
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    #18

    Hi guys. My BF has just gone on holiday for two weeks and I'm already missing him so much! it hurts all the time to think he's so far away, and i've not been sleeping or eating very well. I'm getting better very very slowly (its been 5 days now) but i'm really struggling to cope. I love him so much and miss him and think about him constantly. Any advice on how I can carry on with my life while he's not here?? He's been leaving me little romantic messages in envelopes with dates written on them (I got a tape of him singing love songs and telling me he loves me this morning), and ive done the same for him, but it makes me cry to read them and miss him even more. I'm so lonely atm

    But the worst thing is i've really started to worry about next year. I'm going to uni in 12 months, and I know thats ages away but i love him more every day and its so hard to be without him now, I dont know how i'll cope for months at a time. Our relationship is a secret (he's older than me) so I havent been able to talk about it with anyone other than him, and when we discuss it we both end up upset or worrying about how hard it will be. Help!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hi guys. My BF has just gone on holiday for two weeks and I'm already missing him so much! it hurts all the time to think he's so far away, and i've not been sleeping or eating very well. I'm getting better very very slowly (its been 5 days now) but i'm really struggling to cope. I love him so much and miss him and think about him constantly. Any advice on how I can carry on with my life while he's not here?? He's been leaving me little romantic messages in envelopes with dates written on them (I got a tape of him singing love songs and telling me he loves me this morning), and ive done the same for him, but it makes me cry to read them and miss him even more. I'm so lonely atm

    But the worst thing is i've really started to worry about next year. I'm going to uni in 12 months, and I know thats ages away but i love him more every day and its so hard to be without him now, I dont know how i'll cope for months at a time. Our relationship is a secret (he's older than me) so I havent been able to talk about it with anyone other than him, and when we discuss it we both end up upset or worrying about how hard it will be. Help!
    Hmmm ok whilst your worrying about him you need to think: It's only two weeks that he's gone. But your ok to worry, obviously everyone does. Just count down the days until he gets home, maybe plan something special for the two of you for when he gets back?

    As for the uni, PM if you want, im going through the same thing kinda, my bf of a year and 4 months is going this september.
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    Hi there anon 16 I understand that you miss him, but have you considered that you may be too dependent on him? You should think about a decent coping strategy for when he goes to uni so that you don't fall to pieces. It's possible to love someone dearly without being unable to function normally when they're not there - you deserve to be able to be happy when he's not around. Perhaps try and keep a diary to help you analyse your feelings and keep your feet on the ground. Hope this helps a little
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hi guys. My BF has just gone on holiday for two weeks and I'm already missing him so much! it hurts all the time to think he's so far away, and i've not been sleeping or eating very well. I'm getting better very very slowly (its been 5 days now) but i'm really struggling to cope. I love him so much and miss him and think about him constantly. Any advice on how I can carry on with my life while he's not here?? He's been leaving me little romantic messages in envelopes with dates written on them (I got a tape of him singing love songs and telling me he loves me this morning), and ive done the same for him, but it makes me cry to read them and miss him even more. I'm so lonely atm

    But the worst thing is i've really started to worry about next year. I'm going to uni in 12 months, and I know thats ages away but i love him more every day and its so hard to be without him now, I dont know how i'll cope for months at a time. Our relationship is a secret (he's older than me) so I havent been able to talk about it with anyone other than him, and when we discuss it we both end up upset or worrying about how hard it will be. Help!
    Don't worry yourself about what will happen in a year's time. Who knows, you might not even be together then, so don't get yourself upset about something that might not happen- enjoy the here and now. Spend as much time as you can with your friends and family doing normal things. You really need to have your own life away from your boyfriend. If the worst should happen and you split up, you need to be able to cope on your own. Why is it a secret? Does it really need to be? If your family know, they'll be able to support you when you're missing him.
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    (Original post by aubergine8)
    i sometimes feel the same way, and we seem to have the same kind of brain! once my bf leaves me then i feel completely hopeless, lost etc... but then 3 or so weeks without him makes me think about him to a lesser extent (he kind of fades into the back of my thoughts - although i do think about him everyday). i guess we're 'lucky' in the sense that we can go on with our own lives instead of obsessing and sulking around? but if ur feeling insecure recently and even think LDR is not fitted to you, why dont you talk to him about how u feel? maybe talk about ur plans to see him/whenll be the next time to meet, etc. and do you two communicate regularly? its hard but try to find out what exactly it is that you need, whether LDR is suited for you, or maybe try to find something to occupy your mind.. sorry i dont know how much this helps :/ but know that you are not alone!
    Thanks for the help We do communicate regularly, but have been doing less lately, so maybe that's why I am feeling odd.
    I think I'm going to wait til he comes back again and see how it goes.
    Thanks *hugs*
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    Hiya, just to solve all my problems with my relationship :woo: -

    Can a non-student live with a student in the Uni campus, providing the non student still pays the bills etc. ?

    Thanks
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    I imagine it depends on the University, if you can do it at all.
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    Ohhh guys I am a regular in the LDR thread but thought you all might be able to give me some advice (maybe someone else has been in this situation?)

    Basically me and my bf (we've been together for nearly a year and a half) will have been apart for a month with absolutely no contact, and I'm terrified that when he gets back he will suddenly have changed and not want a girlfriend any more, or have had some sort of epiphany because he's been away volunteering in Africa.. and think that relationships are pointless compared to what he has been doing.

    It'd be great to hear from anyone who hasn't had any contact with their partner for this sort of time! Thank you
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    (Original post by Safyrex)
    Hiya, just to solve all my problems with my relationship :woo: -

    Can a non-student live with a student in the Uni campus, providing the non student still pays the bills etc. ?

    Thanks
    Depends on the uni - some offer 'family' or 'couples' accommodation, some don't.
    However, this is a really important decision for you two as a couple: how long have you been together? Have you lived together before? etc...

    (Original post by lazzyfuzzylou)
    Basically me and my bf (we've been together for nearly a year and a half) will have been apart for a month with absolutely no contact, and I'm terrified that when he gets back he will suddenly have changed and not want a girlfriend any more, or have had some sort of epiphany because he's been away volunteering in Africa.. and think that relationships are pointless compared to what he has been doing.
    Hi Lou :hello:
    I can understand why you feel this way. It's unlikely that he'll now see relationships as 'pointless' in comparison - everyone I know who's done something like this hasn't retreated into a Mother-Teresa-like existence, they've just seen it as a valuable experience and then got back to life as before. If he HAS changed to that extent (and I think it's unlikely) then chances are he would have changed his mind wrt relationships anyway, regardless of what was going on in his life, if that makes sense
    When is he getting back?
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    ^Hey Bianca thankies for the reply.

    He gets back in 10 days and that's why I have suddenly had this fear I think.. because it's so close and I've realised it feels like we've been so distant (emotionally) as we haven't been able to contact each other - it really is the total lack of contact that has made this paranoia rear its ugly head..

    I guess it'll be a little weird when he gets back with him just adjusting to life back here again, but hopefully that won't mean our relationship will be rocky.. oooohhh and I was so enjoying my summer
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    There's no denying that the adjustment may be weird. However, try not to read too much into any mood changes that he/you might be going through: it probably is just that, adjustment, rather than being some major panic about the state of your relationship Remember, it's good for a relationship to know that the two of you can both cope quite well alone too
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    I have accidentally found myself in a relationship and have fallen really in love. It's all good and everything and we knew i would end up going away to university in the months to come



    well the months have passed and ill be going away next month. I live In worcestershire and i am going all the way to Devon


    How the hell will i cope being away from him??

    Will it work/does it work??


    how??


    I just need to talk to someone about these things, i get really really upset thinking about it, but i really want it to work out when i do go away
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    (Original post by L O R E A L)
    I have accidentally found myself in a relationship and have fallen really in love. It's all good and everything and we knew i would end up going away to university in the months to come



    well the months have passed and ill be going away next month. I live In worcestershire and i am going all the way to Devon


    How the hell will i cope being away from him??

    Will it work/does it work??


    how??


    I just need to talk to someone about these things, i get really really upset thinking about it, but i really want it to work out when i do go away


    thats horrible :/, all i can say it may work or may not, if you both feel the same and are commited then i dont see why it couldnt, ull still see each other in holidays ect ...

    i promised myself that i wont be in a relationship when going to uni..


    good luck


    :]

    xxx
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    LDRs are the true test of relationships...they could make you or break you, you'll find out in time.
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    It won't work. Eventually you'll find yourselves drifting painfully apart, coming quickly to discover that all love dies.
 
 
 
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