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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm sorry if this is in the wrong place.

    I've been with my GF one year and been in a LDR for about 5 months.

    I really thought that our relationship was unshakeable, you know the kind where you picture your future in 20 years time. Anyway she is in another country studying and it's been hard. I try to talk to her at least a little each day but I sometimes can't. I am in my last year of uni and, have been studying really hard in an effort to get a good job to give my fair share to our joint future.

    however I found out recently that my GF has been cheating, it has really upset me. I have never cheated on her. I never would (it's not because I don't get the chance, Iv'e had numerous offers) It's because I respect her and would never want to hurt her.

    what should I do? I know it's the obvious "dump her" but I really love her.

    Would you ever give someone who cheated another chance?

    Any advice welcome.

    Thank you.
    I'm so sorry that your girlfriend has cheated on you. I think it's really disrespectful to cheat on you, especially when you both are long distance. I've never been in your situation before so I can't say "Well what I did was..."

    I know it must been hard at the minute. And dumping her would seem like the obvious choice. So you have that, but if you think you might be able to forgive her, then tell her that you want to work through it and get your relationship back on track. She hasn't respected her and she has seriously hurt you, but if you feel that one day you can forgive her, tell her.

    Good luck with everything :hugs:
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm sorry if this is in the wrong place.

    I've been with my GF one year and been in a LDR for about 5 months.

    I really thought that our relationship was unshakeable, you know the kind where you picture your future in 20 years time. Anyway she is in another country studying and it's been hard. I try to talk to her at least a little each day but I sometimes can't. I am in my last year of uni and, have been studying really hard in an effort to get a good job to give my fair share to our joint future.

    however I found out recently that my GF has been cheating, it has really upset me. I have never cheated on her. I never would (it's not because I don't get the chance, Iv'e had numerous offers) It's because I respect her and would never want to hurt her.

    what should I do? I know it's the obvious "dump her" but I really love her.

    Would you ever give someone who cheated another chance?

    Any advice welcome.

    Thank you.
    I think for me it would depend on how they cheated.

    If it was a one time accident, and they were really remorseful, I'd think about it. There would have to be a long period of rebuilding trust though, and I'd probably alway have it in the back of my mind.

    If it happened repeatedly, or they didn't seem to care, I wouldn't bother. Clearly that person has no repsect for the idea of being in a relationship.
    • #267
    #267

    I was just wondering if any one else had run into the following issue and perhaps had any advice:

    I've been with my boyfriend for just over a year now, we met at uni but he was an exchange student and has now gone back home. We're incredibly committed to each other and try and talk at least once every day. The problem I'm having is that I miss him like crazy So what happens is that when we initally skype, I'm so happy and excited to be speaking to him. But then a little bit into the conversation, I'll remember how far away we are from each other and how much I miss him and I cant help but grow sad. I try not and pretend to be happy but he knows me too well to believe the mask I try and wear. And then he blames himself and thinks he's done something to upset me.

    I guess what I'm asking is, is there some way I can deal with the separation just a bit better so that how much I miss him and how miserable I am without him doesnt come across every time we skype?
    • #267
    #267

    * correction: I try not to
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    My boyfriends going to university at the start of the next school year. We've been together for 2 years and see eachother most days, all the unis he's planning on going to are quite far away and i know im going to find it quite hard to adjust. We're planning on staying together and for me to join him at uni the year after (provided that both of us get in of course) because his first 2 choices are luckily enough my first two choices aswell. I know its ages away but i'm really stressing. Does anyone reckon this is a realistic plan? How do you all cope with long distance relationships, any advice etc
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    I really miss my girlfriend something awful. I really, really wish I lived closer to her so I could see her whenever I wanted.
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    (Original post by kexy)
    I really miss my girlfriend something awful. I really, really wish I lived closer to her so I could see her whenever I wanted.
    How far are you apart? Did you split up for uni?
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    (Original post by staring.space)
    How far are you apart? Did you split up for uni?
    We've been in a LDR since we got together but things just don't ever get easier. I always miss her like crazy and I wish she was here so bad.
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    (Original post by ASmith10)
    My boyfriends going to university at the start of the next school year. We've been together for 2 years and see eachother most days, all the unis he's planning on going to are quite far away and i know im going to find it quite hard to adjust. We're planning on staying together and for me to join him at uni the year after (provided that both of us get in of course) because his first 2 choices are luckily enough my first two choices aswell. I know its ages away but i'm really stressing. Does anyone reckon this is a realistic plan? How do you all cope with long distance relationships, any advice etc
    Phone, Skype ,Letters, Photo messages, Emails.

    Essentially try and have some form of contact everyday even if its only a text.

    Personally i found that our realtionship is better than ever as we were both stressed as of april due to exams then the fact there was the uncertainty of wether we would cope long distance but our relationship is stronger then ever as we talk for at least an hour everyday and when i saw her on the weekend it was absoloutely amazing and im almost enjoying having an LDR as i have my own life but still have someone i know i can count on if im having a bad day etc also i still get more sex than people that sleep around
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    I'm going to be studying in America for a year in September as part of my course (American Studies). I know it seems like a long way off yet but I have to start planning it and going to meetings every fortnight at uni to prepare now and I feel like I won't be able to cope with being so far away from my boyfriend I'm currenly about an hour away from him, he's in Cardiff university and I'm in Swansea and I find that hard enough. It's getting to the point where I'm thinking of backing out of the year abroad!
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    (Original post by WelshLily)
    I'm going to be studying in America for a year in September as part of my course (American Studies). I know it seems like a long way off yet but I have to start planning it and going to meetings every fortnight at uni to prepare now and I feel like I won't be able to cope with being so far away from my boyfriend I'm currenly about an hour away from him, he's in Cardiff university and I'm in Swansea and I find that hard enough. It's getting to the point where I'm thinking of backing out of the year abroad!
    Don't back out, you'll regret it! It sounds like an amazing opportunity and even though it'll be tough with your boyfriend you'll survive. Make sure you Skype/email lots and you'll be alright. :hugs: I lived in Italy for a year and although it's not as far away as the US, due to various factors we only saw each other once every few months, but we survived. :yep:
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    (Original post by jeh_jeh)
    Don't back out, you'll regret it! It sounds like an amazing opportunity and even though it'll be tough with your boyfriend you'll survive. Make sure you Skype/email lots and you'll be alright. :hugs: I lived in Italy for a year and although it's not as far away as the US, due to various factors we only saw each other once every few months, but we survived. :yep:
    Aww thanks. I was always going to do either Spanish or French in university and changed my mind during summer holidays before I started. Being in Europe I think would be more comforting as I know I could just get on a flight if I really had to but with America I can't! Glad to hear your relationship survived through it Did you go home for Christmas/other holidays?
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    (Original post by WelshLily)
    Aww thanks. I was always going to do either Spanish or French in university and changed my mind during summer holidays before I started. Being in Europe I think would be more comforting as I know I could just get on a flight if I really had to but with America I can't! Glad to hear your relationship survived through it Did you go home for Christmas/other holidays?
    Yeah, I went home for Christmas and Easter (slightly longer then because of the volcanic ash) and a couple of other times in between for random events. I think being in Europe made it more frustrating for me, because I couldn't go home nor could he come to visit, but he was so close. At least America is radically different so there'll be lots to do and explore!
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    (Original post by jeh_jeh)
    Yeah, I went home for Christmas and Easter (slightly longer then because of the volcanic ash) and a couple of other times in between for random events. I think being in Europe made it more frustrating for me, because I couldn't go home nor could he come to visit, but he was so close. At least America is radically different so there'll be lots to do and explore!
    Ahh I see. Yes I expect that would be frustrating. I'll probably only be able to come home for Christmas seeing as they don't have Easter over there Yes hopefully I'll be too busy to think about it too much but I can see me being a wreck the first few days!
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    Are you going to the US (as in, not central/south America)? Because I'm pretty sure they get mid-term breaks which coincide with Easter...

    The first few days are always the worst and then you snap out of it and it's sorta alright. I mean, obviously there's days where you miss them like crazy and it's not like you ever completely forget about them, but you just get on with it, I guess.
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    Yeah i'm going to US, not sure what state yet, I have a long list of places and every one has different term dates. Some of the uni's spring break only lasts 4 or 5 days so that would be a bit pointless to go home! Thanks for the advice anyway
    • #247
    #247

    Argh, I'm such a worrier.

    I get really excited when I go to visit my man every 2 weeks. However, at the same time I get really paranoid and anxious.. what if he's changed? What if we're going to have 'the talk'? What if he's decided he wants to split with me but not said it on skype?

    This is all running through my mind and it worries me all the time! Personally I think we're a strong couple. He's been with me for the best part of two years and he's been through a lot with me, but it still doesn't stop me from getting all girly paranoid.

    What do you think? :/
    • #147
    #147

    This is abit of a strange question maybe, but I'm just wondering.....how often do you LDR couples have sex??

    Its just my bf is 2 hours away travelling and we have now commitments in the week, and he is busy often on weekends..... so probably won't be able to see each other as much as we want to. He has a really high sex drive, when we stay with each other, he wants it like, 3-4 times a day. I'm worried that he might find it too hard to not see each other as much as we can now (which isn't even that much), and i dont know, cheat on me or break up with me or something
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Argh, I'm such a worrier.

    I get really excited when I go to visit my man every 2 weeks. However, at the same time I get really paranoid and anxious.. what if he's changed? What if we're going to have 'the talk'? What if he's decided he wants to split with me but not said it on skype?

    This is all running through my mind and it worries me all the time! Personally I think we're a strong couple. He's been with me for the best part of two years and he's been through a lot with me, but it still doesn't stop me from getting all girly paranoid.

    What do you think? :/
    You need to calm down and trust him, otherwise you'll ruin the time you do have together
    • #247
    #247

    (Original post by Melting Sugar.)
    You need to calm down and trust him, otherwise you'll ruin the time you do have together
    Yeah you're right. Thing is, he seems to be having such a good time there and I'm always worried about him just forgetting about me

    He's always on about how his uni city is better than mine, too. I can never tell whether it's a joke, but nevertheless it really upsets me because everytime he says it, it makes me more and more regretful that I didn't apply to the same city - especially since uni isn't living upto my expectations as much as I thought it would. I said why it made me feel rubbish yet he still does it, and I don't think he understands..
 
 
 
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