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    (Original post by tsr-member)
    OK. So I need some help, guys :erm:

    My boyfriend is moving to go to university 300 miles away (could totally write a song about that..) and before he goes, I'm wanting to build a little "going-away pack" for him.

    Going-away pack: Noun, Singular
    A box with lots of little presents inside for him to open on the train or in his new room or something. Presents can be anything from cutlery and plates for his kitchen, to hand-crafted cards for his desk.

    I've thought of a few ideas (feel free to steal) but would really appreciate some more;

    Packaging;
    I'm going to get a shoe box, wrap it in old-fashioned brown paper, stick some vintage looking stamps on it, and tie it up with some string. I'm then going to get some pretty vintage-looking wrapping paper to line the inside of the shoe box with. ..chances are that he won't even notice but I just like making things look pretty :mmm: oh, and I'm also going to stick a printed photo of the two of us on the inside of the lid.

    Inside stuff;
    • First of all, a card is the most obvious thing - I'll buy a little sweet post-card to write a message about how much I'll miss him, etc..


    • He's is awful in the morning. Nothing can wake him up! So I was thinking something useful like this. What are people's thoughts?


    • I also want something for fresher's week. Something fun to show that he can still have a good time even if he's in a relationship. Nothing alcohol-related (as I don't drink) but something that would be more "fun" rather than generically "romantic".. ideas?


    • Also, there's a mug at my flat that's kind of "his".. he always uses it. So I was thinking of putting that in his box to use at uni.


    I'll update as I think of more but please quote me and add something else (or comment on what I've already put) Cheers guys!

    N.B. Bear in mind that everything has to fit inside a shoe box..
    Oooh! Amazing idea! I made something similar for my boyfriend before we parted.

    I think those are great things to include. But how about something more personal as well? Like some kind of memento that reminds him of you? (Best thing would be one of your shirts that carries a bit of your perfume. Not sure if that would occupy too much space though)
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    (Original post by Pearl_Lyng)
    Oooh! Amazing idea! I made something similar for my boyfriend before we parted.

    I think those are great things to include. But how about something more personal as well? Like some kind of memento that reminds him of you? (Best thing would be one of your shirts that carries a bit of your perfume. Not sure if that would occupy too much space though)
    Ohh, I hadn't thought of that :yep: it's an awesome idea! And there is in-fact a perfume that I always wear (a Paris Hilton one :blush: ..please refrain from judging - it smells lush!) but as you say, fitting a shirt or something inside the box might be problematic..
    I have a few thin scarves I wear - could perhaps spritz one of those and put it in?
    ...OR just spray the inside of the box before putting all the presents in. ..not sure if the scent will stay particularly nice like that though..
    What do you think?

    :dontknow:
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    (Original post by tsr-member)
    Ohh, I hadn't thought of that :yep: it's an awesome idea! And there is in-fact a perfume that I always wear (a Paris Hilton one :blush: ..please refrain from judging - it smells lush!) but as you say, fitting a shirt or something inside the box might be problematic..
    I have a few thin scarves I wear - could perhaps spritz one of those and put it in?
    ...OR just spray the inside of the box before putting all the presents in. ..not sure if the scent will stay particularly nice like that though..
    What do you think?

    :dontknow:
    Hmm...I'd go with the scarf if you have enough space. That way, he can drape it on his pillow or something, and you can rest assured that you'll be the last thing on his mind before he falls asleep.

    Unless he's not that sentimental. Then spritzing the box might work just as well.
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    Argh I feel like crying right now

    I've been in an LDR since me and my boyfriend first got together in June. He's just started medicine at Warwick and doesn't seem to have any time for me anymore. Even on MSN I get one word replies, he says it's because he's not used to balancing the workload with me at the moment, but I am off to Italy for Erasmus on Tuesday and I feel like I'm wasting my time trying to have a conversation with him. It's my last few days of freedom.. I so desperately want this to work out, I'd be so devastated if I lost him because everything seems so perfect when we're together Hugs needed.
    • #381
    #381

    (Original post by tsr-member)
    OK. So I need some help, guys :erm:

    My boyfriend is moving to go to university 300 miles away (could totally write a song about that..) and before he goes, I'm wanting to build a little "going-away pack" for him.

    Going-away pack: Noun, Singular
    A box with lots of little presents inside for him to open on the train or in his new room or something. Presents can be anything from cutlery and plates for his kitchen, to hand-crafted cards for his desk.

    I've thought of a few ideas (feel free to steal) but would really appreciate some more;

    Packaging;
    I'm going to get a shoe box, wrap it in old-fashioned brown paper, stick some vintage looking stamps on it, and tie it up with some string. I'm then going to get some pretty vintage-looking wrapping paper to line the inside of the shoe box with. ..chances are that he won't even notice but I just like making things look pretty :mmm: oh, and I'm also going to stick a printed photo of the two of us on the inside of the lid.

    Inside stuff;
    • First of all, a card is the most obvious thing - I'll buy a little sweet post-card to write a message about how much I'll miss him, etc..


    • He's is awful in the morning. Nothing can wake him up! So I was thinking something useful like this. What are people's thoughts?


    • I also want something for fresher's week. Something fun to show that he can still have a good time even if he's in a relationship. Nothing alcohol-related (as I don't drink) but something that would be more "fun" rather than generically "romantic".. ideas?


    • Also, there's a mug at my flat that's kind of "his".. he always uses it. So I was thinking of putting that in his box to use at uni.


    I'll update as I think of more but please quote me and add something else (or comment on what I've already put) Cheers guys!

    N.B. Bear in mind that everything has to fit inside a shoe box..
    Condoms :rolleyes: sorry just bitter from experience...
    Does he drink? Doesn't matter if you don't. Thats going to be the way to show him he can still have fun.
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    (Original post by tsr-member)
    Ohh, I hadn't thought of that :yep: it's an awesome idea! And there is in-fact a perfume that I always wear (a Paris Hilton one :blush: ..please refrain from judging - it smells lush!) but as you say, fitting a shirt or something inside the box might be problematic..
    I have a few thin scarves I wear - could perhaps spritz one of those and put it in?
    ...OR just spray the inside of the box before putting all the presents in. ..not sure if the scent will stay particularly nice like that though..
    What do you think?

    :dontknow:
    The scent will stay for a good while =] I always spray the insides of my boxes too when I send my boyfriend gifts. You can also lightly spray the postcard (hold it quite far away when you spray it, and be careful that the ink doesn't get smudged) if you want to be extra sure the scent will stay.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Condoms :rolleyes: sorry just bitter from experience...
    Does he drink? Doesn't matter if you don't. Thats going to be the way to show him he can still have fun.
    He does drink - not loads - but he likes a night out every now and then.
    Would would you suggest? I'd get him some shot glasses or something but he only drinks pints :dontknow:
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    (Original post by Redpanda91)
    Argh I feel like crying right now

    I've been in an LDR since me and my boyfriend first got together in June. He's just started medicine at Warwick and doesn't seem to have any time for me anymore. Even on MSN I get one word replies, he says it's because he's not used to balancing the workload with me at the moment, but I am off to Italy for Erasmus on Tuesday and I feel like I'm wasting my time trying to have a conversation with him. It's my last few days of freedom.. I so desperately want this to work out, I'd be so devastated if I lost him because everything seems so perfect when we're together Hugs needed.
    Aww :hugs:
    Did you get together this June (as in 3 months ago)? If so, that's quite a short duration so perhaps it'll just take some time for him to adapt. Also, I can imagine as a Medic, he probably has a significant work-load so that could be why he mentioned that he's finding difficulty balancing the two.
    I wouldn't worry yourself - perhaps try distracting yourself so you're not always thinking about it. And if I were you, I'd book a coach straight down to Warwick for a few days before you head off to Italia! It'd be a nice surprise for him. I hope all the best for you!

    I'll officially be in an LDR in about 2 weeks, so we'll be in the same boat :erm: bad times.
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    (Original post by C_B_C)
    No offense to girls at all, but I've always thought that guys are much more straight forwards. If a guy's in a LDR, it's because he LIKES YOU A LOT. He's not going to suddenly find a substitute, get bored of you, or decide to be gay.
    I find girls slightly less predictable, to be completely honest
    If your BFs in a LDR, chances are that he's not going to cheat on you, and he's not going to get bored of the situation either.
    This is so reassuring. Really really reassuring. I hope you're right. My boyfriend is a serial commitment phobe (when asked whether he'd been with one girl for a long time, he replied in the affirmative. I said, "how long? Like, a year? Two years?" Him: "Three months.") and he has said that he had never fallen in love (if I'm allowed to say that on here without anyone attacking me for it...) with anyone before me, and that he'd never really been himself with other girls before me. (By "himself", I mean intensely irritating, frustrating and argumentative...)

    ... (long bit no one has to read if they don't want to)
    Spoiler:
    Show


    However it's often a nightmare trying to get him to put aside time to Skype me or write to me. When he does, it's great, but other times I'm going spare mentally because I've heard NOTHING from him. We've also been trying to sort out him coming to visit me in October half term, but first he had to check what the dates of his debating competitions were, then he told me he needed to work for the money, and that he needed to find out if he got a job as a judo trainer. He got the job. Then he said that the one job wasn't enough and that there might be another possibility for him to earn some money, but he wouldn't tell me what it was. I still don't know whether he's coming or not and half term is five weeks away, and I would still need to book the hotel and stuff. I have a feeling he isn't. We've planned hypothetical dates for late December but I would really rather he came in October for obvious reasons. Not only is it closer, and I think I am either going to go mad if I have to wait till Christmas, or we will end up breaking up because he'll stop missing me. Additionally, England would just be hectic after Christmas and I'd rather have less stress because then I can relax and concentrate on spending time with him. Aaaand Christmas is the last holiday we have at the same time as each other and I would really like to visit him in Tallinn and meet his family and stuff. My mother believes that he might just be stalling and stalling and that he isn't actually that keen on me, but he just doesn't want to tell me straight out that he doesn't want to see me. I keep telling myself that he wrote me a love letter and sent it to my home, that he wouldn't be in the relationship if he weren't committed to it, that it's stupid to get paranoid and insecure, but sometimes I can't help it, and get really depressed about it, feeling convinced that we're finished. There's that little doubt niggling in my head now, making me wonder why he keeps saying that there's nothing special in Estonia and that he'd rather visit me instead (and then I start wondering whether he's ashamed of me or doesn't want me to meet his family...I have no idea if they even know I exist; probably not), or whether he's doing that thing where guys are too scared to break up with you so they just try and make you do it yourself... I wish I could be more secure in this relationship but it feels like walking on a tightrope...

    I did Skype with him yesterday though and I was really miserable (wow, I'm sounding like a right barrel of laughs in this post!) because I'm doing about a million things at once and I don't even have time to see my family. I'm in college more than an hour early and leave it two hours late, and I know I'm heading for burnout but there's nothing I can do about it. Although he was an absolute prat to me for a large proportion of the time, when we ended the call I felt rather at peace, and rather happy, which makes a change as often when I finish talking to him I feel even more depressed! I'm hoping that the fact he made me really, really happy was a sign not to give up




    (Original post by C_B_C)
    I've been walking through the LDR forum for years now, and honestly, my conclusion is that if a guy's in an LDR he's taking it dead seriously: he wouldn't be there in the first place if not.

    I remember a couple of cases where the guy's cheated and then tried to hide it (which never works), but it tends to be the girls.

    This really isn't a criticism, it's just a generalization: I know well that not all girls are un-solid and I know that not all guys are straight forwards.

    I think girls are just slightly less sure of themselvs, and their feelings can change more easily than a guys.



    I've honestly heard of a few cases where a girl's worried if her BF might be gay or not. Try not to get offended over a joke
    (if you do, never, ever, go on sikipedia)
    Again, I really hope you're right! I wish I could just take stuff at face value and I once had a dream that my boyfriend was gay and was leaving me. Traumatic, especially as when I woke up I had a hard time remembering it wasn't true!
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    (Original post by tsr-member)
    Aww :hugs:
    Did you get together this June (as in 3 months ago)? If so, that's quite a short duration so perhaps it'll just take some time for him to adapt. Also, I can imagine as a Medic, he probably has a significant work-load so that could be why he mentioned that he's finding difficulty balancing the two.
    I wouldn't worry yourself - perhaps try distracting yourself so you're not always thinking about it. And if I were you, I'd book a coach straight down to Warwick for a few days before you head off to Italia! It'd be a nice surprise for him. I hope all the best for you!

    I'll officially be in an LDR in about 2 weeks, so we'll be in the same boat :erm: bad times.
    Yeah it was this June, and it's his first relationship so we're both pretty new to everything. I guess I just need to give it time and we'll adjust to it, hopefully. I'm going on Saturday to visit for the weekend, which will be nice Also, I guess it'll be easier once I'm busy doing Italian uni work and such. I've said that maybe we can set aside just an hour every night to have a catch up and have a more extensive chat at the weekends, thank goodness for webcams and microphones! Thank you for your reply I hope your LDR works out ok, it helps to remember that it most likely won't be forever!
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    Guys I'll be seeing my boyfriend on Sunday!!!

    It has been thirteen months since I've seen him in person :| I can hardly believe it... Stupid international LDR, expensive plane tickets, and uni But we will finally be in the same country for at least the next 3 years! <3
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    im about to be thrown into one of these...sad
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    I leave on sunday, and i'll see her in 3 weeks. I'll write her a letter for her eighteens with the train ticket inside )
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    (Original post by lottielouise)
    im about to be thrown into one of these...sad
    Same :cry2: how far is your distance?
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    Hi guys! I hope you're all well. Quite a few people have posted here recently in the same boat as me - I suppose it's inevitable it being September.

    Anyway, I think I can now officially join this thread without jinxing things =/ So I met a guy on the last day of July and hit it off so well, we've been meeting up all summer more and more (he works as a TA so he had the time), basically acting like a couple, and I finally had the 'conversation' (of sorts) last weekend about me going away.

    Because I'm going to France. Not just France, the absolute South of France :facepalm:. And I can't get out of it because it's for my stupid bloody degree.
    I go on the 25th and tbh today I've been having a bad day feeling stressed and teary...as it gets closer I just want to go less and find it harder to leave him cheerfully. He's such a good person though and is always making sure I'm alright so I talk to him but at the same time, I can be such an optimistic person and I've been so cheerful all summer, I don't want to just bare all and be like 'yeah I'm completely depressed at the thought of going'.
    It doesn't help that this is the first proper 'relationship' I've been in since I was at school. Last summer I had a fling and was in such a mess when I went back to uni, I didn't care 10% as much about that guy as I do this one, we have such a connection, it's not something I've experienced before, but I'm scared that so much time apart will prove it too hard to maintain I mean he might come to see me over October half term and we're going to call/text/email etc but still..
    I guess, it's normal nerves really...about being really bad at my job and at making friends and speaking the language....made worse by the prospect of not only leaving behind friends/family but also him :cry2:

    Gosh, sorry for the rant.
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    (Original post by tripsis)
    Guys I'll be seeing my boyfriend on Sunday!!!

    It has been thirteen months since I've seen him in person :| I can hardly believe it... Stupid international LDR, expensive plane tickets, and uni But we will finally be in the same country for at least the next 3 years! <3
    Oh my gosh! Here's all of us, moaning about our LDRs and that is nothing compared to this! Crazyy but amazing! How has it been? Obviously VERY hard, but you've stayed together? I admire you both.
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    (Original post by I'm_Unsafe.)
    Hi guys! I hope you're all well. Quite a few people have posted here recently in the same boat as me - I suppose it's inevitable it being September.

    Anyway, I think I can now officially join this thread without jinxing things =/ So I met a guy on the last day of July and hit it off so well, we've been meeting up all summer more and more (he works as a TA so he had the time), basically acting like a couple, and I finally had the 'conversation' (of sorts) last weekend about me going away.

    Because I'm going to France. Not just France, the absolute South of France :facepalm:. And I can't get out of it because it's for my stupid bloody degree.
    I go on the 25th and tbh today I've been having a bad day feeling stressed and teary...as it gets closer I just want to go less and find it harder to leave him cheerfully. He's such a good person though and is always making sure I'm alright so I talk to him but at the same time, I can be such an optimistic person and I've been so cheerful all summer, I don't want to just bare all and be like 'yeah I'm completely depressed at the thought of going'.
    It doesn't help that this is the first proper 'relationship' I've been in since I was at school. Last summer I had a fling and was in such a mess when I went back to uni, I didn't care 10% as much about that guy as I do this one, we have such a connection, it's not something I've experienced before, but I'm scared that so much time apart will prove it too hard to maintain I mean he might come to see me over October half term and we're going to call/text/email etc but still..
    I guess, it's normal nerves really...about being really bad at my job and at making friends and speaking the language....made worse by the prospect of not only leaving behind friends/family but also him :cry2:

    Gosh, sorry for the rant.
    Hey, I know how you feel right now. I am going to Japan for a year on 2nd October, which is scary enough on its own without leaving the person you love behind! I've been doing a lot of thinking and coming to terms with it.

    I think you've already made a good start by talking about it. If you are both willing to give it a shot that's already the best you can do. Make plans before you go - plan a definite visit and give yourself something to look forward to. My boyfriend has already booked plane tickets for Christmas. I'm jealous of you, you are only in France and that's a whole lot cheaper than travelling to Japan! This is only temporary, and if it's right, it will work out.

    More importantly, don't let this spoil your time abroad. There will probably be difficult times, I'm expecting to be quite homesick at the beginning, but you will be really cross with yourself if you don't make the most of it. Think about all the interesting stories you will be able to tell him about - I'm sure he'd much rather hear that you're enjoying yourself than feeling miserable about being so far away.

    I hope this helps, all the best.
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    (Original post by tripsis)
    Guys I'll be seeing my boyfriend on Sunday!!!

    It has been thirteen months since I've seen him in person :| I can hardly believe it... Stupid international LDR, expensive plane tickets, and uni But we will finally be in the same country for at least the next 3 years! &lt;3
    Oh wow, how did you manage 13 months?! You must have some kind of a secret, do tell
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    (Original post by StephJ)
    Oh my gosh! Here's all of us, moaning about our LDRs and that is nothing compared to this! Crazyy but amazing! How has it been? Obviously VERY hard, but you've stayed together? I admire you both.
    (Original post by such_a_lady)
    Oh wow, how did you manage 13 months?! You must have some kind of a secret, do tell
    It has been sooooo difficult! Although I think the fact that we both have very big online lives has helped us a lot. We both work for the same website and generally spend a lot of time online gaming and reading forums, etc. As such, we always talk for several hours a day every day on Skype. This helps sooo much with missing him and eliminates any trust issues. Since we're talking almost all the time anyway, I don't worry about him running around cheating on me or anything. And communication has never been a problem for us. We have an eight hour time difference so every day he leaves me a message to wake up to telling me what he's done that day, letting me know that he's thinking of me, etc. It's an amazing thing to wake up to every morning and I do the same for him

    We always try to find fun activities to do together. We have played online games together and we love the same TV shows so we watch those "together." We download them and then watch them at the same time every week so we can talk/laugh about them together. It's a huge comfort and makes us feel like we're together physically even though we're not.

    The biggest challenge is going to bed. Every time I lay in bed I remember what it was like to sleep with him and just cuddle and be close and it drives me crazy! I often times just stay up trying to remember things about him or funny things we've done together. Or even simple things like exactly what his face looks like or the feeling I would get when we'd cuddle up and watch a movie, etc.

    There are times when it's a huge struggle but we both know that we want to be together long-term so it's worth sacrificing a few months for a future lifetime together
    • #358
    #358

    3 months until I see her 23 Sept is the mid-way point between the time I last saw her and the next time so it'll be easier after that. I'm finding I'm not feeling clingy or demanding since uni has started as I have other things to occupy myself with and since she's not too demanding it's easy.
 
 
 
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