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    (Original post by I'm_Unsafe.)
    Yeah, I empathise with the 'starting over' feeling *hugs*. Hope you're feeling better now, I sort of am. It was actually a bit easier than last time because I was straight back into it, but at the same time during my 'downtime' I've found myself very tired/lethargic and a bit depressed, probably 'cuz I haven't got it out of my system as effectively.

    I was going to go on a day out tomorrow (just me, not in a group) to see a new town and keep myself busy, but now I'm feeling like I can't be bothered getting up at 6am and I'd much rather just lie in bed all day and be pathetic...but I did that on Wednesday =/
    Thanks I am feeling better since I made that post. It's so much more difficult to keep myself busy at the moment though, because the weather is terrible and the snow keeps me from going far. I'm just stuck in the mountains. I also feel like I've already run out of things to do here, it's the same thing every weekend and I'm drinking all the time just because I'm bored. It doesn't feel healthy.

    I wish I could travel more, but we never get the time off, and the city isn't very well connected, so travelling anywhere other than Kansai or Tokyo requires a whole day of travel and a lot of money. I'm so frustrated! Why couldn't they have placed me somewhere like Osaka!

    Definitely go and do your day out, or you'll be sitting around annoyed the whole day that you didn't go! Invite a few friends if it helps.
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    #212

    (Original post by outlaw-torn)
    Well me and my boyfriend have had a very messy break up so I'm no longer in a LDR. Fun times. :/
    :hugs: sorry to hear that, do you have any advice for the rest of us? :/ my own LDR is looking pretty shakey right now (hence anon)
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    (Original post by rainbow drops)
    Oooh, you're an ELA in France! I've applied for that, reallyyyy hoping I get it definitely not looking forward to the stress and separation it will impose on my relationship if I do, though.
    Awesome! Well, you should get it, most people do, you'd have to be pretty unlucky not to.

    Well no, it's not easy but France is a lot closer than a lot of places - I initially applied for Quebec but pretty glad I didn't get that now!
    The only annoying thing about being in the South is it does make it harder to 'nip over' for a weekend say - the Eurostar only comes down here in the summer so I'd either have to fork out to get to Paris which takes beaucoup de time and money, and working Fridays + beng in the countryside means I can't really get to a big airport without wasting too much time in transit.
    BUT it's only a 7 month contract and basically you get there and have a 2 week holiday just after you start, then another two weeks for christmas, then at the end of february and then again in april and then you're done before May!
    Where have you put down as your 3 choices?

    (Original post by kat91s)
    Thanks I am feeling better since I made that post. It's so much more difficult to keep myself busy at the moment though, because the weather is terrible and the snow keeps me from going far. I'm just stuck in the mountains. I also feel like I've already run out of things to do here, it's the same thing every weekend and I'm drinking all the time just because I'm bored. It doesn't feel healthy.

    I wish I could travel more, but we never get the time off, and the city isn't very well connected, so travelling anywhere other than Kansai or Tokyo requires a whole day of travel and a lot of money. I'm so frustrated! Why couldn't they have placed me somewhere like Osaka!

    Definitely go and do your day out, or you'll be sitting around annoyed the whole day that you didn't go! Invite a few friends if it helps.
    Good to hear

    Yeah, I appreciate the difficulty getting to 'new' places. Most people I know work a 3 day week max, my roomie does 2 days, but because I'm at so many schools it was hard to co-ordinate so I have to work Fridays which really limits how far I can get over a weekend - I've visited all the nearby Southern towns now and I wanna travel further afield but taking into account the 3/4 hour journeys each way and the cost, it's silly to go for what becomes half a day. Basically, I wanna car!

    I ended up compromising, I realised I'd never been to look in Nimes properly and I ought to, given that the last time I ended up stuck there in the station I was in a terrible, terrible mood. Instead of spending hours on the train, it's about 45 minutes not including the connexions and I didn't have to get up til much later, score

    If you can't get very far, go local, join an evening class of some sort, just something random, to get out and meet people?
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    (Original post by I'm_Unsafe.)
    Awesome! Well, you should get it, most people do, you'd have to be pretty unlucky not to.

    Well no, it's not easy but France is a lot closer than a lot of places - I initially applied for Quebec but pretty glad I didn't get that now!
    The only annoying thing about being in the South is it does make it harder to 'nip over' for a weekend say - the Eurostar only comes down here in the summer so I'd either have to fork out to get to Paris which takes beaucoup de time and money, and working Fridays + beng in the countryside means I can't really get to a big airport without wasting too much time in transit.
    BUT it's only a 7 month contract and basically you get there and have a 2 week holiday just after you start, then another two weeks for christmas, then at the end of february and then again in april and then you're done before May!
    Where have you put down as your 3 choices?
    Thanks for the info! I'd been wondering about how competitive it is for ages, since I don't know anyone that's done it and the website/Facebook page give no indication, so that's reassuring. I'm not doing it as a year abroad thing, so I won't get that priority, but I did get an A in my French A Level, have some experience with kids and got a good uni reference, so fingers crossed.

    I haven't actually put any area choices down. I put that I wanted to live in an urban/town area and work at primary level, but that's it. I've been considering phoning the British Council and asking them if they'll add areas to my application, though, because I keep having nightmarish thoughts about ending up in outre-mer or in a tiny village in the middle of nowhere or something, which is not what I want at all >.< I reeeeeally love the idea of Paris but it sounds like it's very hard to find feasible accommodation there and the costs would be a nightmare. Argh. Did you get your first choice?
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    (Original post by I'm_Unsafe.)

    Yeah, I appreciate the difficulty getting to 'new' places. Most people I know work a 3 day week max, my roomie does 2 days, but because I'm at so many schools it was hard to co-ordinate so I have to work Fridays which really limits how far I can get over a weekend - I've visited all the nearby Southern towns now and I wanna travel further afield but taking into account the 3/4 hour journeys each way and the cost, it's silly to go for what becomes half a day. Basically, I wanna car!

    I ended up compromising, I realised I'd never been to look in Nimes properly and I ought to, given that the last time I ended up stuck there in the station I was in a terrible, terrible mood. Instead of spending hours on the train, it's about 45 minutes not including the connexions and I didn't have to get up til much later, score

    If you can't get very far, go local, join an evening class of some sort, just something random, to get out and meet people?
    That's great! I could do with a car too. I even applied for a driving permit before I left but the AA lost it.

    I'm about 4/5 hours from Osaka, Kyoto, and Nagoya, and they are the nearest big towns. Japan is a lot bigger than it looks on the map! There are other smaller towns nearby, but a lot of the transport to points of interest is closed off because of the snow. It's driving me crazy!

    The university has societies, but you can't join in the middle of the year (The academic year starts in April over here) so another thing that I can't do for a while yet. I really don't mean to moan but it's so frustrating!

    I get 7 weeks off in Feb and March, so I'm focusing on that now. Hopefully I'll be doing some travelling to Hiroshima and Kyushu, as well as a visit home, and my first visit to Tokyo to meet up with a Japanese friend!
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    one of the best things about this thread, is it makes me feel better. You strong folk out there are dealing internationally, who am i to complain so bitterly about a couple hundred miles?? Thanks for the reality check and helping me see i'm not alone and there are folk to talk to Stay strong <3
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    (Original post by jeh_jeh)
    Amorrrr! (Darling, for the uninitiated) :hugs:
    Grazie tante cara (thanks my dear)

    (Original post by I'm_Unsafe.)
    :console: Chin up, you will deal with it, even if it seems otherwise right now!
    I know thank you I've done half of the year, I can do another half, I just really don't want to go back to italy. So excited for spain in feb though

    (Original post by HeatherM)
    one of the best things about this thread, is it makes me feel better. You strong folk out there are dealing internationally, who am i to complain so bitterly about a couple hundred miles?? Thanks for the reality check and helping me see i'm not alone and there are folk to talk to Stay strong &lt;3
    Yeh its fab! You might also like the chat thread where you can go and generally have a natter too Don't worry though, when I wasn't international I used to complain about how much of a pain in the ass it was everyone does it! and i'm sure when we stop being international and start getting used to just being 3 hours away by train again i'll start bitterly complaining again LDR is hard whether you're a couple of hundred miles away or a couple of thousand, keep your chin up, we're all here for each other
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    So, dealing with a relationship that's between America (Florida) and UK/France? About 6 hours difference max. Skype everyday, and iMessage everyday... apart from that, I'm going to use most of my free weeks to visit home and my sweetheart, hopefully. Sound like a sound idea?
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    (Original post by ct2k7)
    So, dealing with a relationship that's between America (Florida) and UK/France? About 6 hours difference max. Skype everyday, and iMessage everyday... apart from that, I'm going to use most of my free weeks to visit home and my sweetheart, hopefully. Sound like a sound idea?
    In my opinion, it's not the distance it's the people that counts. Of course, a good relationship can be strained by the miles, I'm not saying it isn't. However I compare myself to my roommate.
    She's American and she broke things off reluctantly with her boyfriend before coming to France (obviously it is much further than UK/France) they're still really close and he even came to visit her last week! But she had been to France before and tried LDR and apparently it was too hard so she didn't want to try again.
    Me, on the other hand, I miss him terribly but we take it in our stride, don't get (too) wound up about the little things and are closer as a result. I think it's actually making me MORE relaxed about the relationship

    Basically my point is, if you both think you can make it work, you will. But you have to adapt - yourself and the relationship - to the new circumstances. Don't keep expecting the same old same old.
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    i shall be joining this thread :ninja:
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    I think this thread might be good for me! My boyfriend (of 3 years) is in the army, currently posted in Canada. Its our first long-term separation since we've been together, and I'm coping ok at the moment, bit of a pain with the time difference but never mind. I guess I'm just a bit worried cos this is my penultimate term at uni before I graduate, and arguably the most important term of my whole time here! I'm sure I'll be ok but just wondering if anyone has any tips to make it a little easier??
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    (Original post by I'm_Unsafe.)
    In my opinion, it's not the distance it's the people that counts. Of course, a good relationship can be strained by the miles, I'm not saying it isn't. However I compare myself to my roommate.
    She's American and she broke things off reluctantly with her boyfriend before coming to France (obviously it is much further than UK/France) they're still really close and he even came to visit her last week! But she had been to France before and tried LDR and apparently it was too hard so she didn't want to try again.
    Me, on the other hand, I miss him terribly but we take it in our stride, don't get (too) wound up about the little things and are closer as a result. I think it's actually making me MORE relaxed about the relationship

    Basically my point is, if you both think you can make it work, you will. But you have to adapt - yourself and the relationship - to the new circumstances. Don't keep expecting the same old same old.

    Well, we're already far from each other - train journey's about 4 hours, and we're managing ok - miss each other like hell though. We see each other about once a month currently. But we want to make this work, and I will be coming back to the UK every few weeks - and I hope he'll be visiting me as well.
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    (Original post by kat91s)
    That's great! I could do with a car too. I even applied for a driving permit before I left but the AA lost it.

    I'm about 4/5 hours from Osaka, Kyoto, and Nagoya, and they are the nearest big towns. Japan is a lot bigger than it looks on the map! There are other smaller towns nearby, but a lot of the transport to points of interest is closed off because of the snow. It's driving me crazy!

    The university has societies, but you can't join in the middle of the year (The academic year starts in April over here) so another thing that I can't do for a while yet. I really don't mean to moan but it's so frustrating!

    I get 7 weeks off in Feb and March, so I'm focusing on that now. Hopefully I'll be doing some travelling to Hiroshima and Kyushu, as well as a visit home, and my first visit to Tokyo to meet up with a Japanese friend!
    It'll make you appreciate the UK all the more when you get back, that's for sure! You won't look at things quite the same way again.
    Well that's silly/a pain. It's okay to moan sometimes I'd even go so far as to say it can be good for you, if you get it out your system. You've just gotta make sure you don't do it all the time haha (which I'm sure you don't!).
    7 weeks? Wow, that's a long time, something definitely to keep in your head when you're frustrated/down

    (Original post by rainbow drops)
    Thanks for the info! I'd been wondering about how competitive it is for ages, since I don't know anyone that's done it and the website/Facebook page give no indication, so that's reassuring. I'm not doing it as a year abroad thing, so I won't get that priority, but I did get an A in my French A Level, have some experience with kids and got a good uni reference, so fingers crossed.

    I haven't actually put any area choices down. I put that I wanted to live in an urban/town area and work at primary level, but that's it. I've been considering phoning the British Council and asking them if they'll add areas to my application, though, because I keep having nightmarish thoughts about ending up in outre-mer or in a tiny village in the middle of nowhere or something, which is not what I want at all >.< I reeeeeally love the idea of Paris but it sounds like it's very hard to find feasible accommodation there and the costs would be a nightmare. Argh. Did you get your first choice?
    Oooh, that's daring! Well, I didn't put down area choices until March/April because I put Quebec down originally and it was only when I wasn't successful there that they asked me where I wanted to put down. I don't think they actually start properly going through applications til around March anyway, because they have to deal with interviews for certain countries first. So, potentially maybe yeah you could. Daniel Lovelock is probably the guy you need to email.
    You probably won't be outre-mer or in Paris, because these are really highly competitive places, loads of people go for them. Which did you put first in your 'order of preference'? town size or school age? If the former, you're probably more likely to end up in a good sized town. I put school age first and although I'm not quite in the tiniest village, I am somewhere pretty small in the countryside, so I commute in from a slightly larger town.
    Well, I didn't actually get ANY of my choices! Maybe, in retrospect, it was because I didn't get to choose them until later. I put down Versailles, Poitiers and Bordeaux. I was always tempted towards the south of france, but I didn't choose the Aix-Marseille region because I figured from the info they gave us that I'd never have a chance getting in there! So I was confused but happy to get a place here. Having spoken to a few people, I actually think it's not as popular as I thought - maybe it's because while the big cities by the coast are nice, there's alot of really quiet rural areas that don't appeal so much. I'm not sure.
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    All the uni work I have is preventing me from seeing my boyfrienddd

    (Original post by I'm_Unsafe.)
    Oooh, that's daring! Well, I didn't put down area choices until March/April because I put Quebec down originally and it was only when I wasn't successful there that they asked me where I wanted to put down. I don't think they actually start properly going through applications til around March anyway, because they have to deal with interviews for certain countries first. So, potentially maybe yeah you could. Daniel Lovelock is probably the guy you need to email.
    You probably won't be outre-mer or in Paris, because these are really highly competitive places, loads of people go for them. Which did you put first in your 'order of preference'? town size or school age? If the former, you're probably more likely to end up in a good sized town. I put school age first and although I'm not quite in the tiniest village, I am somewhere pretty small in the countryside, so I commute in from a slightly larger town.
    Well, I didn't actually get ANY of my choices! Maybe, in retrospect, it was because I didn't get to choose them until later. I put down Versailles, Poitiers and Bordeaux. I was always tempted towards the south of france, but I didn't choose the Aix-Marseille region because I figured from the info they gave us that I'd never have a chance getting in there! So I was confused but happy to get a place here. Having spoken to a few people, I actually think it's not as popular as I thought - maybe it's because while the big cities by the coast are nice, there's alot of really quiet rural areas that don't appeal so much. I'm not sure.
    I put school age first because I really want to teach primary and that's where my previous experience in the UK lies. I'd feel really odd teaching adults and secondary/college level would pretty much be my worst nightmare :teehee: I hope that doesn't have too much of a negative bearing on my chances of being placed in a town or a city >.< I wouldn't mind a village IF it was near a town or city and had good, cheap transport links, but if it was literally in the middle of nowhere I'd get very bored very quickly. One of the reasons I didn't choose academies was because I thought I'd have more chance of being placed somewhere urban if I asked to be, but then wasn't fussy about areas of France into the bargain (since the website warns you that if you want an urban area but then choose a region like Aix-Marseille or Lyon, it's likely that you'll be placed in a small village) but I'm not sure that approach is going to work now. From the Facebook page and other info I've read, where people get placed seems like a bit of a lottery. Gah.
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    Anyone else find it hardest just after you've gone away? This is the first time I've gone to uni as his girlfriend, and I feel like I'm coping way worse with the distance than I was at the end of last semester. I'm thinking it's exacerbated by the fact that I'm not quite back into the swing of being without him/in Scotland? Sound normal?
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    (Original post by miraclemile)
    Anyone else find it hardest just after you've gone away? This is the first time I've gone to uni as his girlfriend, and I feel like I'm coping way worse with the distance than I was at the end of last semester. I'm thinking it's exacerbated by the fact that I'm not quite back into the swing of being without him/in Scotland? Sound normal?
    Yes, the first few days of separation are always by far the worst. In the LDR chat thread, we refer to that as an LDR hangover
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    Also, my boyfriend and I don't live close to each other, about 4 hours by train. Could this be classified as LDR?
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    (Original post by ct2k7)
    Also, my boyfriend and I don't live close to each other, about 4 hours by train. Could this be classified as LDR?
    Yes... i tend to classify a LDR as a relationship where due to distance its hard to see each other as much as you want. Sometimes this distance is an hour, sometimes its several thousand miles but either way it makes it harder to see your other half. I'm currently doing spain to England but when we're both at uni it's 3hrs. I still count what i do at uni as LD because i only get to see him once every 2-3 weeks which is obviously not as much as id like.
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    (Original post by Shiv91)
    I think this thread might be good for me! My boyfriend (of 3 years) is in the army, currently posted in Canada. Its our first long-term separation since we've been together, and I'm coping ok at the moment, bit of a pain with the time difference but never mind. I guess I'm just a bit worried cos this is my penultimate term at uni before I graduate, and arguably the most important term of my whole time here! I'm sure I'll be ok but just wondering if anyone has any tips to make it a little easier??
    Decide on a set day/time to skype... make it a date day and then send emails/fb chat the rest of the week so that you have time and energy to get through your work as i imagine one of you needs to stay up late in order to speak to the other? My other tip is to keep busy which I'm sure you'll be able to do, through yourself into your last term of uni, get work done, catch up with friends and make the most of it If you ever need to rant/vent then feel free to join us in the chat thread we've got a few people who are LD due to army/navy.
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    (Original post by 22KT22)
    Yes... i tend to classify a LDR as a relationship where due to distance its hard to see each other as much as you want. Sometimes this distance is an hour, sometimes its several thousand miles but either way it makes it harder to see your other half. I'm currently doing spain to England but when we're both at uni it's 3hrs. I still count what i do at uni as LD because i only get to see him once every 2-3 weeks which is obviously not as much as id like.
    We're coping ok I know we can get through this - it'll be difficult, but certainly possible.
 
 
 
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