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    I think, while the break idea will feel better for a day or two, over the course of the month while you could have been healing you'll instead be left hanging on and hoping for something that's unlikely to happen.
    If you're not gonna see him for that whole month and hardly talk then you'd be as well letting go now. If you can see each other a few times then maybe there's still hope.

    We can put him on "the list" for you if you want :ninja:
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    Hah. People keep asking if I want to be revenged upon him. I don't hate him at all, I'm barely even angry. I'm mostly disappointed. I had a few doubts but I wanted this to last. It's just weird that this morning I was halfway to falling in love and now I'm just meant to turn off all these emotions. Add to that I'm back at home- which I hate- and would much rather be back at uni amongst friends. At least I go back in the morning.
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    I'm glad you're not doing too bad :hugs: If you decide he'd be better on the list, then come see us in the LDR Chat thread and we can sort it out for you
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    (Original post by Ginger_Rogers)
    I started going out with a guy a month ago (which I know isn't long, but we connected INSTANTLY. I feel more for him than I felt for my boyfriend who I was with for 2 years) but he's going to Australia til March on Tuesday. I'm so upset, I don't know what to do! I'm hoping to go out there for a bit in January but still, it's so long.

    Really don't know how I'm going to cope, so it's nice to see others in the same situation!
    My bf's been back home in Australia for 2 weeks now, and so far it's going really well. We've been in email/text contact every day, and have managed to skype call every couple of days. He's also coming back over here in March/April (fingers crossed!) I know it's really early days in our LDR but atm it feels like we can really do this. So if you both want to stay together and are prepared to put in the effort it definitely can work.
    Good luck with everything.
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    (Original post by swingin_yoyo)
    Umm yeah I have, the problem I'm having is, the only Northern one I would apply to would be Durham, and he has been set on the South cos he knows that is where I wanna go, so If I didn't apply to Durham the furthest we would be from each other is Bristol and UEA which i doubt would happen anyway, its more likely to be 1 hour/2 hour distances, which I'm fine with, Durham to London though is like 8 hours on the train, expensive and an annoying journey! I would find it heartbreaking to be THAT far from anyone, especially him! So we were thinking, if he applies to say somewhere like newcastle/leeds/manchester/liverpool and then if I pick durham he could put that as his first choice and we wouldn't be ages from eachother?!
    I'm not sure though!
    I'm 17 yup, and he has been my rock and best friend so it is really important to me that I can hop on a train and see him if things get really bad and university for like a weekend.
    It's actually easier to get from Durham to UEA on the train than Bristol to UEA, I think so anyway.
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    (Original post by thepinkpowerranger)
    I haven't seen my boy for 4 days and neither of us are happy about it...

    I'm making a 4 hour journey to home and back tomorrow to hang out with him all day... It costs me less than half what it would cost me cos he's not really up to speed with the internet and doing stuff online and also is too old for a YP railcard...

    I miss him. But I get to see him tomorrow...

    Neither or us slept on Thursday night cos we were thinking about each other... I text him at about 5 am and he called me then I tried to sleep cos I had my induction at uni yesterday really early! And he called me at half 7 to make sure I woke up for it, aww...

    LDR

    edit: And I get to have his cooking tomorrow, yay. I already told him I'm stealing some to take back with me lol.

    It kind of feels like part of me is missing... Which is kinda lame and sounds so *mimes throwing up*, but it's true...

    I completely sympathise with you.
    My boyfriend went away this time last week so its been 7 days since I've seen him and it feels like a lifetime.
    When he first went away I couldn't eat or sleep or anything for quite a few days.
    However, I don't think you should go into too much detail how you're really sad without him because it'll only make him feel worse when he's away from you. Be really positive about when you're going to see each other next and keep yourself busy. Hopefully the time will fly by.
    A bonus of being away from him will mean you will truly appreciate the time you spend with him. I know you will do already but it becomes extra special
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    ok it's been a hard weekend.
    after the whole number swop (swopped numbers with 2 girls on the first night), i've obviously felt very insecure.
    he then sent me a very confusing text on which i thought he meant he was dancing with some girls (same girls from flat above) on a particular night. so i text him saying have a good night then, sarcastically...
    we then spoke the next morning, he convinced me i'd got it wrong and that he was getting pissed off of the accusations.
    ever since then it's been hard to talk to him, like almost awkward ont he phone - long silences and stuff, and i end up crying after most calls.

    i just want to see him, it's SO hard.

    i decided i'd be happy on the phone tonight, and really try and get a good conversation going. it worked and everything was fine, so i decided to ask him if everything was ok with us. he replied yes, but he felt annoyed last week. understandably, but he should have understood how upset i was over the first night?

    anyway, i said to him it was because of the first night, and he said ok. then i asked if he had any doubts about us, and he replied with a no... and said he was happy.

    which is fine...
    just arrghhh...

    ******* hell...
    it's so annoying because everything was SO SO SO perfect before uni.
    like the only 1 disagreement we had was around 3 weeks ago, and only over something about him going to uni...

    it feels as though we're becoming more distant, and i don;t know what to do to change it? apart from be as happy as i can when talking to him, try and have the best weekend with him, and just - support him with everything.
    but i don't know if that;s enough?

    what else can i do to make sure we're still going ok, and reassure myself that everything is fine.

    because there is this nagging feeling i can;'t stop thinking about that makes me think we're going down...

    please help x
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    (Original post by lucyhol1012)
    I completely sympathise with you.
    My boyfriend went away this time last week so its been 7 days since I've seen him and it feels like a lifetime.
    When he first went away I couldn't eat or sleep or anything for quite a few days.
    However, I don't think you should go into too much detail how you're really sad without him because it'll only make him feel worse when he's away from you. Be really positive about when you're going to see each other next and keep yourself busy. Hopefully the time will fly by.
    A bonus of being away from him will mean you will truly appreciate the time you spend with him. I know you will do already but it becomes extra special
    I'm glad (And also not cos it means you're feeling what we are!) that people are going through the same things...

    I saw him today, yey! I walked 4/5 miles, cycled about 6 miles and have taken about 4 trains today just to get to see him for a few hours. Was worth it though.. Especially seen as he cried at me down the phone yesterday. He hasn't cried for literally years...

    At the same time as feeling this, I know that when we finally get to be together all the time it will be so much better and also, at least we've met each other!!!!! Every cloud has a silver lining.

    And he made tonnes of extra food and gave me a bag full of stuff, yummy.
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    well theres freshers over and done with now! hope evryones coping ok.
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    i think anyone who is actually worried because their bf has gone away should have more trust in his loyalty, otherwise your relationship will fail. Just a thought.
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    Well my ex girlfriend has gone back to uni far away from mine, shes my ex but were still close mates so missing her quite a lot. *Sniffle*
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    (Original post by Skingods)
    well theres freshers over and done with now! hope evryones coping ok.
    Mine starts in a few days actually and my girl's is ongoing this week.
    • #43
    #43

    My boyfriend of almost 3 years left for uni yesterday, whilst I go in a week's time. During this time I'm stuck at home/working full-time and very early mornings which means no socialising or seeing anyone. All my other friends have left for uni already- I'm going up north whilst my boyfriend's going to stay in the south.

    I knew I'd miss him, but after speaking to him and hearing him at his Fresher's week party n stuff I feel so so so unbelievably upset- I just wanna be there with him and can't actually contemplate being apart for so long. I know when I get up to my uni n get involved I'll feel better. But for the moment I just can't stop thinking about him moving on whilst I'm left here..and after looking at how complicated the transport for me to visit him is I'm even worse.

    I can't stop crying and I know it's stupid and we promised we'd stay together but it's actually making me feel sick, how far apart we'll be and how we won't share any of these times. The fact he's not brilliant at calling me or anything kinda makes it worse.

    I don't even know why I'm posting this cos I just sound like a freak but I would really appreciate any advice or hear of anyone else's experiences just to get me through this week that I know is going to be hell.

    Thanks xxx
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    My boyfriend of almost 3 years left for uni yesterday, whilst I go in a week's time. During this time I'm stuck at home/working full-time and very early mornings which means no socialising or seeing anyone. All my other friends have left for uni already- I'm going up north whilst my boyfriend's going to stay in the south.

    I knew I'd miss him, but after speaking to him and hearing him at his Fresher's week party n stuff I feel so so so unbelievably upset- I just wanna be there with him and can't actually contemplate being apart for so long. I know when I get up to my uni n get involved I'll feel better. But for the moment I just can't stop thinking about him moving on whilst I'm left here..and after looking at how complicated the transport for me to visit him is I'm even worse.

    I can't stop crying and I know it's stupid and we promised we'd stay together but it's actually making me feel sick, how far apart we'll be and how we won't share any of these times. The fact he's not brilliant at calling me or anything kinda makes it worse.

    I don't even know why I'm posting this cos I just sound like a freak but I would really appreciate any advice or hear of anyone else's experiences just to get me through this week that I know is going to be hell.

    Thanks xxx
    If you are used to seeing him all the time it is not supprising that the idea of being away from him would worry you. I suppose the best thing is to try and distract yourself for the next week until you get to uni and can start settling in there.

    I am going to move this over to the LDR advice thread as there are lots of people here who have been or are in long distance relationships and can help
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    My boyfriend of almost 3 years left for uni yesterday, whilst I go in a week's time. During this time I'm stuck at home/working full-time and very early mornings which means no socialising or seeing anyone. All my other friends have left for uni already- I'm going up north whilst my boyfriend's going to stay in the south.

    I knew I'd miss him, but after speaking to him and hearing him at his Fresher's week party n stuff I feel so so so unbelievably upset- I just wanna be there with him and can't actually contemplate being apart for so long. I know when I get up to my uni n get involved I'll feel better. But for the moment I just can't stop thinking about him moving on whilst I'm left here..and after looking at how complicated the transport for me to visit him is I'm even worse.

    I can't stop crying and I know it's stupid and we promised we'd stay together but it's actually making me feel sick, how far apart we'll be and how we won't share any of these times. The fact he's not brilliant at calling me or anything kinda makes it worse.

    I don't even know why I'm posting this cos I just sound like a freak but I would really appreciate any advice or hear of anyone else's experiences just to get me through this week that I know is going to be hell.

    Thanks xxx
    I'm in exactly the same position as you, and it is HORRIBLE. My Chap left for Warwick on Sunday, and unlike you, I'm stuck at home for another year. It is a horrible, hideous feeling. I think that all you can do is keep the lines of communication as open as possible. Explain to him that he needs to call you (it might be worth looking into Skype for this - it's free!) and make sure you find different ways of keeping in contact too, like letters and cards. Also, I got a Young Persons Railcard to travel to my chap, and we're splitting travel costs halfway. You get a 1/3 off for £24 a year, and if you're really far apart, it'll pay for itself in just one journey.

    Every time he talks about new friends or new experiences, it is going to hurt like hell. I don't know if that ever gets better, but don't let it make you resent him or hate him - he'll feel the same about your new friends. I'm keeping a calender to cross off the days until I see him - it makes it seem better somehow. I don't want this to sound patronising..sorry. My head's everywhere at the moment! If you can make it through, the times you do spend together will be so much better. This is the toughest bit - it can only get better! Also, the first week is going to feel the worst anyway, because he's settling in and trying to find his feet in a new environment. It'll be the same for you in your first week, so make sure you cut each other some slack.

    3 years is pretty impressive!

    Good luck hun, I'll be lurking about for PMing if you wants.

    xxxx
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    (Original post by Holty-Dave)
    i think anyone who is actually worried because their bf has gone away should have more trust in his loyalty, otherwise your relationship will fail. Just a thought.
    I agree with you.
    It's hard enough them going away anyway with all the missing them.
    But if you're worried then clearly you can't trust him as much as you should be. Being paranoid as well as missing him is not going to help at all.

    I trust my boyfriend 100% and all I want is for him to enjoy himself. That's the only way you're going to be able to relax and for it to get easier.
    As long as you keep open the lines of communication then you've got nothing to worry about!
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    (Original post by Skingods)
    well theres freshers over and done with now! hope evryones coping ok.
    Where has your boyfriend gone to University?
    I'm glad mine is enjoying himself. I was so worried he'd go away and feel a bit lost and not settle in. But he's doing okay and I'm going to see him on Friday and I can't wait.

    It's getting easier each day I think.
    He's so good the way he wants to chat everyday and text and things

    How much do you chat to your boyfriend day to day?
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    (Original post by lucyhol1012)
    Where has your boyfriend gone to University?
    I'm glad mine is enjoying himself. I was so worried he'd go away and feel a bit lost and not settle in. But he's doing okay and I'm going to see him on Friday and I can't wait.

    It's getting easier each day I think.
    He's so good the way he wants to chat everyday and text and things

    How much do you chat to your boyfriend day to day?
    hes gone to st andrews!

    yeah i think its getting abit easier! although insaying that i think when i leave him and come home after visiting him i will have to start all over again!

    we chat and text and write to each other whenever we can! i was just getting used to seeing most days and then he left and it was all lonely all of a sudden and i think thats what caught me the most!

    can i just say im so not liekling how they have imerged my thread with this one because it is in no way similar at all!
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    Tbf it is similar... its an LDR thread and if you want to be more chatty there is a chatty thread. we are all missing our other halves and you're more than welcome to join the chat thread. its just because otherwise H&R is full of these threads and it gets annoying which is why we got the advice thread.

    also :hugs: i know what you mean about after seeing them it being worse, we tend to call it a LDR hangover. you get used to being with them and then you miss them and you're shot back to distance again. im finding ice cream is the cure!
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    LDR hangover, that is so cute.
    Ahhh i love this thread!
 
 
 
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