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    (Original post by Couldxbe)
    Would you say £40 every two weeks to visit my boyfriend was reasonable?
    I CAN afford it, it just means that I can't go mental on make-up/clothes/ jewellery.
    That's about what I pay, more or less. We take it in turns to visit each other, so I visit him once a month, where the train costs anything between £45 and £75. Means I have to work as well if I want to make sure I have enough money to treat myself to nice things, but I think it's worth it - helps that I love my very flexible job too
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    I miss him already
    I just cannot wait for christmas when he's back for a decent period of time.
    Grabbing moments every other weekend isnt cutting it for me
    xx
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    (Original post by cazamatazz)
    I'm attempting to rekindle my LDR. >_>
    By way of transferring back home. Kind of a cop-out, but a year is far more do-able than three years, for us. I don't know how he'll react though. I've decided to take this week to think it over properly, then discuss it with him at the weekend.


    I'd say that was very reasonable! Have you looked into national express funfares/megabus?
    Would you be doing that JUST to be with him?
    • #48
    #48

    Hi, basically I moved to uni this weekend and things are already starting to get between me and my girlfriend. I miss her so so much, and I'd give anything to be with her, and I'm scared she doesnt feel as strongly as I do. I'm scared I'm gonna lose her because all of this, it makes me wish I'd stayed at home to be with her. You've all probably heard this all before, but I honestly don't know what to do.
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    if shes the one, go and be with her. your education is important but so is love.
    • #48
    #48

    I just feel pathetic, I've only been here 2 days and I'm already crying because I love her and I can't be with her for at least 2 -3 weeks, and then it'll be another 2 - 3 weeks until I can see her again. She also started at the local uni this week so she ='s been busy and hasn't texted / rung me hardly at all, when the thing I want to do most is just hear her voice.
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    (Original post by Determination.)
    if shes the one, go and be with her. your education is important but so is love.
    Im going to ask again... why the **** do you continue to post in here? you've made it clear you dont believe in LDRs and would never enter one so why do you continue to give unhelpful advice.

    the OP asked what he could do i doubt he needed that kind of advice because quite frankly its stupid and not helpful. if you have no constructive advice please leave.

    Anonymous: please ignore the other poster. what you are going through is quite common, i myself went through it when my bf went away and i know that most of the other people in here have gone through it. we tend to refer to it as a LDR hangover... you've gone from seeing your gf/speaking to her all the time and now its suddenly changed and naturally you're missing that. it does get easier, my tip is to keep busy and try and take your mind of it. go out with friends etc throw yourself into freshers/lectures. atm it will be difficult to speak but if you've both began its important to settle into uni and make friends.

    its good that you know when you'll next see her gives you something to look forward to, a light at the end of the tunnel.

    also on the contact thing after freshers week it'll be easier.. and you'll settle into a schedule which you can work around. have you told her that you'd like to speak to her more often? perhaps text her and ask her when shes free so you can ring her? that way you get to hear her voice.
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    why do you keep constantly putting me down. Im saying that education is important yes but if shes the one and the relationship will not survive without being close to her then what is more important??? he can still go to uni cant he? whats your problem?
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    (Original post by Determination.)
    why do you keep constantly putting me down. Im saying that education is important yes but if shes the one and the relationship will not survive without being close to her then what is more important??? he can still go to uni cant he? whats your problem?
    im not disagreeing that love is important but surely education is more important the OP has clearly picked the uni he wants to go to and worked to get into it. being in a LDR is hard theres no denying that and it is a test of your relationship but if you come through it your relationship is stronger. dropping out isnt always an option... and what if the course he is doing he cant do near his gf should he sacrifice that for a relationship which may not last? if you love someone you will find a way to make it work and if its meant to be it will. i just think that often what you say has no relevance to this thread.
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    i obviously have different viewpoints to most people on here, but isnt that what sites like this are about, differing opinions from a wide range of people from all over the world. I agree with what you say education is important, i work my ass off all the time to get the grades i know i can acheive.
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    (Original post by Determination.)
    i obviously have different viewpoints to most people on here, but isnt that what sites like this are about, differing opinions from a wide range of people from all over the world. I agree with what you say education is important, i work my ass off all the time to get the grades i know i can acheive.
    all i was saying is that being close to the person you love is not always an option for everyone and perhaps suggesting things like that will upset them more when they know they cant be with them. part of loving someone is giving them the space to be who they want to be and to support them in what they do even if that means they are away from you. sometimes its an option of a relationship with distance or not being with the person at all and quite frankly with my bf the first is the best option.
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    well said
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    (Original post by cazamatazz)
    I'd say that was very reasonable! Have you looked into national express funfares/megabus?
    That's for an off peak return from London to Liverpool, but virgin have this crazy offer that if you use an off peak ticket with a railcard you can use peak times (it's odd but very useful).
    Megabus would be cheaper yes but far more time consuming. It takes around 2 hours 30 mins on the train to liverpool (+ 15 min bus ride to Euston if I'm in Camden/ +1 min if I'm in Uni lol) whereas bus would take around 5.
    • #48
    #48

    Me again, thanks for your advice 22KT22. It's the little things that are getting to me (obviously on top of the fact that I'm not seeing her), like, for example, I text her about 2 hours ago, just asking how she was and I haven't heard anything back. I know it's stupid but its silly things like that, that make me worry and think to myself 'does she really still love me like she did before' or 'is she gonna get bored / tired of the LDR'. Apologies for sounding stupid just theres not many people I can talk to about this, all my mates at home know her, and ive only known the people here for 2 days!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Me again, thanks for your advice 22KT22. It's the little things that are getting to me (obviously on top of the fact that I'm not seeing her), like, for example, I text her about 2 hours ago, just asking how she was and I haven't heard anything back. I know it's stupid but its silly things like that, that make me worry and think to myself 'does she really still love me like she did before' or 'is she gonna get bored / tired of the LDR'. Apologies for sounding stupid just theres not many people I can talk to about this, all my mates at home know her, and ive only known the people here for 2 days!
    give it time.
    i felt like you when my bf left, now i have just come back from the best weekend with him ever, feeling more confident than ever about our relationship!

    you'll feel better soon
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    (Original post by wtid)
    Which airline do you go with? It's good living quite near to airports when you're in an LDR eh! When I was still in my LDR, I used to have to fly from Manchester to Hannoiver but because there was a cheap airline doing that route I could (other commitments permitting) go every weekend if I wanted to! It's a bit strange that I was seeing my girlfriend in Germany more often than a lot of other people saw their other half in England!
    Its with easyjet, so I'm quite lucky for the prices I think. Yeah the airport link does help. But still even though its cheap, wouldn't be able to go every week end or whenever I want. But we're getting things sorted out. We have a few trips planned until november! And I'm going this week end, can't wait! And then he'll come, and its a school break so he'll stay here for 10 days!!!!! I do feel great when we're together, but at the moment the distance and me on my own thinking about all this is making me wonder if it can last, although in my heart I do feel it can. I know he loves me so much, but when I think too much I wonder if he will get bored of it or ..meet someone else. But he feels the same, and we are both at the same level at the moment, wanting this to work so much.
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    (Original post by Fleece)
    Would you be doing that JUST to be with him?
    No, not at all. I've got a thread in the main forum about it- there's also my nephew to consider, since I was sort of a surrogate mother to him before I moved away, as well as the fact that the course is better at the university back home. Plus I think I came to this university for the wrong reasons.

    He's just the catalyst, really. I was planning on moving back there at some point anyway.
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    Hi RockyRaccoon

    Don't know if you remember me but thought I'd just drop in to say you can do it - after 3.5 yrs of a France-England LDR we now live together So it IS worth it in the end.
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    Just an update to my situation, we've talked (a lot), and although she wants a bit of space for the first couple of weeks of uni, she's asked me to go up to see her on the weekend. Its £42 return on the train (I've tried loads of ways of trying to get it cheaper, and thats with my young persons card too), but there you go. Will be funded mostly by my pay for this week I think (which I won't get till next month ).
    Can't wait till the weekend now lol
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    (Original post by WelshBluebird)
    Just an update to my situation, we've talked (a lot), and although she wants a bit of space for the first couple of weeks of uni, she's asked me to go up to see her on the weekend. Its £42 return on the train (I've tried loads of ways of trying to get it cheaper, and thats with my young persons card too), but there you go. Will be funded mostly by my pay for this week I think (which I won't get till next month ).
    Can't wait till the weekend now lol
    Have you looked into going by coach or megabus? To go home I have to get the train from York to Leeds and then the megabus from Leeds to Southampton, but it saves me over £40. It might be a bit late now, but its' definitely worth looking into next time. Enjoy your weekend
 
 
 
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