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addicted to depression watch

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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    yes OP I'm similar. I actually like my depression, I hate being too happy because I know when I fall down I'll be even more depressed than before, so depression is like the default mode. I think I would go crazy without it. And yes I listen to sad songs, think of memories, write poems, etc.
    thats great because you have some level of control but not everyone can do that, channelling depression into artistic efforts can be really rewarding, i used to make great beats when i was depressed but now i cant get the same feeling :mad:
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    if i was you id stay on the medication in that case until i was totally, absolutely confident that i could manage without it but dont accept that as set, try to beat it. Its especially important because of bi polar and the point that user 6 made about it getting worse if you return to that state
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    I know what you mean, when I was really depressed about a girl that didn't show a mutual amount of interest, I played some very emotional music - mostly film scores like ones by Thomas Newman - american beauty. It kind of helped because its so beautiful, but bought tears to my eyes and really dramatized the situation.

    I think the reason a lot of people feel depressed is because they create an image in their head of how they would like things to be (in my case with me and this girl).. And when they didn't happen, i was very upset. Im quite an optimistic person, but being depressed about this girl was the worst it has ever been. Slowly getting over her though, given her too many chances! All the best !
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    Sometimes I put on sad music, but I try to be angry through the music so I feel better afterwards.

    Most times, I purposefully put on happy music, for instance some really hyper, happy dance music for when I have loads of energy but feel lethargic to make me dance, since I'll feel better after a little exercise, or something pretty abstract, which seems to say life can be good or something to remind me I can get through this ("Though the past -- the unwanted memories -- are holding on to you, all the power in the universe conspires to carry you. Truths you find through your adversities will defend you, as your powers and all your energies conspire to carry you."). Your tastes almost certainly differ, but you get the idea ;-). I tend to avoid songs about love etc, they don't help.

    If I'm feeling really low, I won't want to listen to any music at all (in fact, not wanting to listen to music and not liking anything I played anyway was what made me seek help, since it was so incredibly unlike me, I usually have music playing all the time I'm awake.)

    But it's like my default is sadness, like I don't know how to be any other way.
    I know what you mean. If I waste most of a day not doing much, I wonder what other people do to fill up the time. But there are times when I feel happy, the problem is making the effort to have them (e.g. to go out). Is there nothing you enjoy, or used to enjoy?
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    I understand what you mean OP.

    I think of it wanting to 'work through' your sadness / depression as you are confronting everything that makes you sad, and slowly you can come to terms with it. I cant listen to happy music when I'm sad, I just think "shut the **** up". Life is made of highs and lows, the lows test you and make you stronger.
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    I find listening to depressing music is OK if it makes me feel better afterwards, but unless I'm normal-angry with something (rather than depressed-angry) it's difficult to do that.

    Usually, happy music is better:
    Something happy/hyper I like to dance to, if I think I ought to exercise a bit (which is a good idea)
    Something abstract/mystical, generally positive
    I love this song. I think the lyrics say that everything you've been through helps you get through life. It also sounds positive, even though (at the start) it's pretty emotional.
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    I definitely listened to sad music, or something that made me nostalgic, when I was unhappy. But that doesn't really happen any more, so yay.

    I do think that depressed people tend to surround themselves with things that exacerbate their depression. The Depression Society on TSR is a classic example, really - members come and talk about how low and unhappy they're feeling, so basically you take all the people who are feeling miserable and they all write about how miserable they are and read about all the other miserable people...I'm not even depressed and that thread made me feel hideous.

    I think the people who listen to happy music when they're down have got the right end of the stick. :p:
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    (Original post by Phantom Phoenix)
    I definitely listened to sad music, or something that made me nostalgic, when I was unhappy. But that doesn't really happen any more, so yay.

    I do think that depressed people tend to surround themselves with things that exacerbate their depression. The Depression Society on TSR is a classic example, really - members come and talk about how low and unhappy they're feeling, so basically you take all the people who are feeling miserable and they all write about how miserable they are and read about all the other miserable people...I'm not even depressed and that thread made me feel hideous.

    I think the people who listen to happy music when they're down have got the right end of the stick. :p:
    Okay, I have to say, for some people the dep soc does that to them, but we're supporting each other rather than "having a moan". It makes me, and other users of that soc, feel slightly better because we realise that we're not alone (which is a typical trait of depression).

    I think. going back to the OP, that it's just so hard to stop the negative spiral, and when you feel low, the last thing you want to do is listen to happy music and see happy things
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    (Original post by raspberrybubbles)
    Okay, I have to say, for some people the dep soc does that to them, but we're supporting each other rather than "having a moan". It makes me, and other users of that soc, feel slightly better because we realise that we're not alone (which is a typical trait of depression).

    While I can see your point, I think the principle is self-defeating; surrounding yourself with depressed people generates a sense of complacency and a feeling that it's okay to be depressed because other people are like that. Having experienced depression myself I can speak from some little experience; I recovered when I extricated myself from situations which reminded me of my problem, rather than returning again and again to places or people that reminded me of depression and encouraged me to fall back into old patterns. At the end of the day, depression is a sickness of the mind and in my experience submerging yourself in it is guaranteed to keep you sick.

    That said, I can see why in crisis situations having people to talk to might help. However, if a person is thinking of self-harming and goes to other depressed people to talk about it, then surely the other people talking about their own experience will only encourage them? Better, surely, to talk to someone who is not depressed who can give a clear, unbiased perspective on the matter, rather than twenty other people who also cut and suffer from the same mental problems?
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    (Original post by Phantom Phoenix)
    While I can see your point, I think the principle is self-defeating; surrounding yourself with depressed people generates a sense of complacency and a feeling that it's okay to be depressed because other people are like that. Having experienced depression myself I can speak from some little experience; I recovered when I extricated myself from situations which reminded me of my problem, rather than returning again and again to places or people that reminded me of depression and encouraged me to fall back into old patterns. At the end of the day, depression is a sickness of the mind and in my experience submerging yourself in it is guaranteed to keep you sick.

    That said, I can see why in crisis situations having people to talk to might help. However, if a person is thinking of self-harming and goes to other depressed people to talk about it, then surely the other people talking about their own experience will only encourage them? Better, surely, to talk to someone who is not depressed who can give a clear, unbiased perspective on the matter, rather than twenty other people who also cut and suffer from the same mental problems?
    I kind of agree with your first paragraph: true, if you move yourself away from those people it can help, but you have to remember, we don't spend our lives in that soc! We all have our day to day lives, we might most a couple of times a day, but in the mainstream, it's not like we post all the time! So, in a way we are still separate but then we help each other and give advice. On to your second paragraph, the example about self harming: the attitude in the soc is don't do it. No-one eggs each other on to SH/commit suicide, but we try to talk it out. I think there'd be something deeply wrong and potentially it could end up being some form of pro-harm site, which I'm pretty sure is illegal! Many people that are "normal" just shun self harm and the person, whereas, if you know some people who have a similar outlook, that is less likely to happen!
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    (Original post by raspberrybubbles)
    I kind of agree with your first paragraph: true, if you move yourself away from those people it can help, but you have to remember, we don't spend our lives in that soc! We all have our day to day lives, we might most a couple of times a day, but in the mainstream, it's not like we post all the time! So, in a way we are still separate but then we help each other and give advice. On to your second paragraph, the example about self harming: the attitude in the soc is don't do it. No-one eggs each other on to SH/commit suicide, but we try to talk it out. I think there'd be something deeply wrong and potentially it could end up being some form of pro-harm site, which I'm pretty sure is illegal! Many people that are "normal" just shun self harm and the person, whereas, if you know some people who have a similar outlook, that is less likely to happen!
    I definitely see your point, although I wasn't accusing anyone of egging on of course! However, I think that talking to someone who does not suffer from depression but doesn't immediately condemn someone for self-harming would be far more positive than speaking to other people who are currently suffering from the same problems. It seemed to me (I was a reasonably-long-term stalker of the Depression Society for a while) that the society provided a point which people would keep returning to for reassurance when other people didn't understand them. I can see the value of this but don't see it as progressive; more as a stable point which keeps depressive people from degenerating further but doesn't actively help either. I suppose I see it as depressed people being stuck halfway up a mountain and able to stop each other falling but unable to reach any higher, while someone who is not depressed can help to pull them higher up. That's just in my experience though (and that of a few people I have known in my life who have also suffered from depression).

    In any case, my apologies for using the society as an example I have no particular problem with it, I just used it because someone had mentioned it above.
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    Get a ****ing grip.

    Have you tried actually having a life?
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    (Original post by Phantom Phoenix)
    I definitely see your point, although I wasn't accusing anyone of egging on of course! However, I think that talking to someone who does not suffer from depression but doesn't immediately condemn someone for self-harming would be far more positive than speaking to other people who are currently suffering from the same problems. It seemed to me (I was a reasonably-long-term stalker of the Depression Society for a while) that the society provided a point which people would keep returning to for reassurance when other people didn't understand them. I can see the value of this but don't see it as progressive; more as a stable point which keeps depressive people from degenerating further but doesn't actively help either. I suppose I see it as depressed people being stuck halfway up a mountain and able to stop each other falling but unable to reach any higher, while someone who is not depressed can help to pull them higher up. That's just in my experience though (and that of a few people I have known in my life who have also suffered from depression).

    In any case, my apologies for using the society as an example I have no particular problem with it, I just used it because someone had mentioned it above.
    It's fine I wasn't trying to argue! I too agree that speaking to someone that doesn't suffer from depression but isn't anti sh would be a good idea, it's just I don't seem to be able to find anyone like that! I know it isn't really progressive, but then again, none of us are qualified therapists/have the experience to be able to practice that kind of help on others! We can encourage, but at the end of the day, yes, we can't actually help people to get totally better (but we can try!!) And people who aren't depressed don't generally tend to use the soc, so...
    (and yeah, there's no other real example on TSR, so I can understand why it's been used )
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    (Original post by raspberrybubbles)
    It's fine I wasn't trying to argue! I too agree that speaking to someone that doesn't suffer from depression but isn't anti sh would be a good idea, it's just I don't seem to be able to find anyone like that! I know it isn't really progressive, but then again, none of us are qualified therapists/have the experience to be able to practice that kind of help on others! We can encourage, but at the end of the day, yes, we can't actually help people to get totally better (but we can try!!) And people who aren't depressed don't generally tend to use the soc, so...
    (and yeah, there's no other real example on TSR, so I can understand why it's been used )
    Ah, in that case I think you're right, it's just a shame there aren't a lot of qualified therapists on TSR...

    Meh, if you're desperate enough you can always talk to me! :p:
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    I get where your coming from.
    I get depressed sometimes, although I would'nt say that it was like my setting. But i always find that rationalising help with depression, questioning why you feel like this and then try to be realistic. Try to put some perspective on your situation. I know its easier said then done. But especially when your like ill and stuffm it helps to try and have a more positive outlook. Whats teh point of being constantly depressed. Find something to live for, occupy yourself
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    You should put in the effort to change your behaviours which catalyse your depression. E.g listen to no sad songs, go for weekly exercise sessions etc
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    (Original post by Phantom Phoenix)
    I definitely listened to sad music, or something that made me nostalgic, when I was unhappy. But that doesn't really happen any more, so yay.

    I do think that depressed people tend to surround themselves with things that exacerbate their depression. The Depression Society on TSR is a classic example, really - members come and talk about how low and unhappy they're feeling, so basically you take all the people who are feeling miserable and they all write about how miserable they are and read about all the other miserable people...I'm not even depressed and that thread made me feel hideous.

    I think the people who listen to happy music when they're down have got the right end of the stick. :p:
    If the thread makes you feel hideous, don't read it. It helps me because I trust that there are people in that thread who will not judge me. The depression society certainly doesn't exacerbate my depression. Talking is one of the most useful things you can do. It isn't easy to talk about mental-health problems openly as often those who have not had any experience of depression (or whatever) cannot relate to or understand where you are coming from. If you didn't have epilepsy (a random example, I know ), you probably wouldn't read and proceed to criticise posts in the epileptic society. Why do so with the depression society?
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    (Original post by thanette)
    I do things like listen to songs that exaggerate my feelings, so yes, to an extent. And I tend to dramatise negative situations in my head too,which is also bad..live in a fantasy world, me :s
    My last gf did that. Its not good :no:
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    OP:

    I think you need to break these habits, as I do not think they are particularly healthy. You may not be able to remember the last time you were happy but that does not mean you have to be indefinitely unhappy. All I can advise is for you to do the complete opposite of what you are doing already, e.g., listen to chirpier music, go for a walk, read something that might put a smile of your face. I know it's hard but it's the only method I can think of. The longer you don't do anything about your depression, the longer you will remain in this self perpetuated rut.

    :console:
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    P.S. I know happy music etc. can be nauseating to listen to when you feel like ****. Nonetheless, listening to something calming may help. Films - not depressing ones - and books (if you can concentrate) are good tools of distraction.
 
 
 
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