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Feeling unhappy.

Hi, Sorry about this thread as you probably get loads like this. But basically i have been feeling pretty down lately, i'm just really fed up and upset with a lot of things atm, things that i dont have control over.

One of the things, i am upset about my family. My parents split up a long time ago when i was little and i lived with my mum and i didn't get to see my dad very often because he lived the other end of the country.... i really miss my dad a lot, even though i speak to him on the phone a lot, but i wish he was closer. My sister is at uni quite far away, and my mum has now moved away as well. I just miss my family, and wish things were different. I have a friend who is so close to her family... they always do "family things" together, and they just seem to be perfect, and i admit i am jealous of them a little...

I am also sad about things that happened in the past that i can't seem to forget about... just silly things like people i fell out with and didn't ever make up with, and stupid things i did when i was younger..... it's as if i cannot forgive myself for them, and even at times when i think i am happy these things pop into my mind and stop me from being properly happy.

There's also lots of other things... other problems, that i am worrying about, meaning that i cannot sleep..... but there are too many things on my mind to go into now.

I feel like i want to talk to someone about everything, like councellor or something, but i cannot afford one, and i don't want anyone to know i am talking to anyone, because to everybody i come accross as this happy person with no/few problems.

The thing is though, that i am happy when i am with people, but when i am on my own, these sad/depressed feelings begin, often when i am trying to sleep.

Anyway i will stop there, sorry about the length, thankyou for reading, and if you have any advice that would be great.

Reply 1

Kay.Tey

It's good that you have written down all these things that are bothering you, I would suggest that you write everything down on paper, even the small stuff so that you can release it all into the open...it might be a good idea to write letters to people too if you have unresolved issues there (you don't have to send them).

Its natural to be jealous of your friend but to be honest, there is no such thing as a perfect family (except in the movies), i'm sure they have ups and downs like everyone else.

I think you should focus more on the 'now' rather than the past.... 'do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment'!

I think if you wrote down everything it might help you sleep better because you will be less likely to have all the thoughts swimming around in your mind.

Hope this helps a lil :smile:

Reply 2

Pheonixx

heyyy, cheer up. Loads of people are sad and they have many problems: like me but never tell anyone. People seeming happy on the outside can be quite the opposite inside.

Reply 3

Comfortablynumb17

Hey there

I really hope that things get better for you. Do you know of any free counsellors in your area? I go to one and hes just good for talking to and getting things off my chest.
Unlike you, i had a great family oriented childhood and im still very close with my family. Thats why ive been so angry that ive ended up with depression because i used to be the happiest girl in the world. I can remember myself back then so well, yet i cannot seem to become her again, even though i am on strong medication. Like you, i hide my feelings and everyone expects me to be happy all of the time.
I guess that's why this website is so good-dont be scared about emailing some of us in this thread! We wouldnt comment if we didnt care! :banana2:

Reply 4

Magnum Opus

it's good to write things down. You probably can't sleep cos of all the thoughts running through your head; try and write everything or draw them before you go to bed. Get into a routine, it'll help!
:hugs:

Reply 5

freeforever

I went to a councellor who was with CAMHS (Child and Adult Mental Health Services) who believe are free (I got them through the NHS but I think they're free anyway). See if you can find them in your area maybe?

Hope this helps, feel free to contact me if you want any more info :smile:

and one more thing *hugs*

Reply 6

marshey

Pheonixx

heyyy, cheer up. Loads of people are sad and they have many problems: like me but never tell anyone. People seeming happy on the outside can be quite the opposite inside.

Way to go on the empathy front. Just because her problem may be similar to others doesn't mean that her's are any less significant.

Reply 7

samperry209

have you spoken to your mum on how you feel?

maybe you should move closer to family?..

but dont ever look back on the past...that is the thing worse you can do! it makes things seem more worse then they really are

Reply 8

granny smith

What a horrible time you are having.x. It is so horrible to feel like that, especially at night time when problems which began as small ones, seem to escalate. It does actually help to write them down, then bury them. I know this is a psychological release, but when you bury them, imagine burying your negative thoughts and fears. There is nothing we can do to change the past unfortunately, all we can do is forgive it, forgive ourselves and work on happier tomorrows. I understand what you mean about conselling. Where i live the waiting lists were so long, they were putting people off for, but not many people can afford private. It is so difficult to realise you do actually need help (linguistic thought therapy would be ideal for you), then find out it is not readily available. The Samaratins do a service where you can post them your problems. Do you feel by writing all your fears down, this could help by releasing some of the weight from your shoulders? Sometimes, just taking a positive step can help you feel a little brighter, as it is reassuring your mind that you are a worthwhile person, who deserves to live life without so much concealed emotional turmoil. Have you ever tried the self help cd's which you can listen to at night time? Take really good care.xx

Reply 9

Pheonixx

marshey

Way to go on the empathy front. Just because her problem may be similar to others doesn't mean that her's are any less significant.

true, but she said everyone else seems fine, and i am not, I was pointing out that they most likely aren't fine. Due to lack of time i didn't answer the rest of the topic.

Reply 10

marshey

Pheonixx

true, but she said everyone else seems fine, and i am not, I was pointing out that they most likely aren't fine. Due to lack of time i didn't answer the rest of the topic.

Totally understandable. I feel the same sometimes too, it's hard to tell anyone but a select few people.

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