20th birthday tomorrow no friends. What do I do ?

I would like to know if there are other people similar and if you have any opinions with what I have written.

Tomorrow is my 20th birthday and I have no friends to spend it with.
I am sorry to trouble you here and I would normally never write so frankly but I don’t know what else to do other than to mope to all of you.
For god sake I am male about to 20 years old and my usual evening involves sitting in tears because I have no one to talk to.
Every notification on my phone gets me hopeful someone is contacting me (plot twist its not)...
Bloody pathetic.
Anyway thats way I write...

I have been diagnosed with .. drum roll please ... asperges (autism), ADHD, depression, anxiety and ME to name the main characters . Despite this I am very fortunate I am an artist as a job I don’t have to pay for my accommodation and my food as I live with my Grandparents. I have done so much therapy ,witch doctoring and jiggery poke I could walk a phd on the subject

Life in theory should be great.
However I am lonely. The only people I have to spend time with is my Grandparents and Parents and they have all given up on me in one way or another, My father decided to do art too and constantly puts me down about it. My grandparents and mother they just look on in despair.
So they make for good company I can assure you.

I have had friends but they all end up falling out with me as I tend to annoy people. I love telling stories and jokes ,talking about my interests but this is only interesting to me and every one else gets really bored (they usually are a bit science-ie and obscure) . I can’t read emotions, I don’t know when to stop with a story or a joke. I am very bad at judging people and knowing wether the mean harm or good. Hence I was in an abusive relationship for a few years. After that ended at the beginning of 2019 I have not had a single friend as she was my only “friend”. Since then I have not been able to make any.

I go out often and chat to people but I can never get on with other people. I don’t think I am bad looking or uninteresting but no one seems to like me or want to know me.
However I hugely struggle with making conversation and small talk.
I want friends I want a real girlfriend.
So tomorrow is another birthday on my own .... I must say I have never had a birthday party or seen any one on my Birthday. (When I was 5 the goal was when I was older I would have friends visiting on a birthday .. I am 20 its yet to happen).
Its got to the point were I hate life I can survive but only just.
I am sorry if you read that, I am sorry for the sprawl of words and the mumbo jumbo, I am sorry to trouble you and I am sorry to ask if you have any suggestions ? Or if there are any other people similar to me I would like to know.