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    Some background stuff: I'm a recovering self harmer. I self harmed for about 4 years so im pretty much covered in scars. I do wear short sleeves/skirts around the house and with close friends, so my scars are on show to those who know me. In class and work theyre always covered. I just want to highlight, this is not an attention thing, i hid it for years until i was hospitalised for something else, and the doctor needed to take blood - thats how my parents found out etc...)
    The problem: Im moving into Uni accomodation in september and im worried about covering them up (ie. shared bathrooms and stuff).
    My plan so far is to wear long sleeves and long pants for the first few weeks, untill ive made friends and they've made judgements about me before i even think of wearing short sleeves. Covering them at all times is really hard, ie, washing dishes, getting a wash in the morning, wearing Pj's etc...
    The Question: I guess my question is, if you were moving into accomodation, and one of your flatmates has scars from self harming (operative word is scars not cuts- theyre all healed and white) would you be freaked out, or think less of them?
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    So long as your over it, I wouldn't bat an eye lid. Maybe I would, literally, for a second... but you know what I mean!!
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    No, I think you could guess what the marks were and as long as they weren't fresh then I wouldn't say anything. I would try not to worry, it's (sadly) more common than most people would think.
    People shouldn't make judgements about you anyway, even if they don't know you and those who do aren't worth bothering with. I wouldn't think any less of them for it. Good luck x x
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    I wouldn't be freaked out or think less of the person. Thing is, a lot of people go through it these days, it wouldn't be a shock for me to encounter someone at uni who has.

    If your scars bug you though generally you could try bio oil on them etc that's meant to be good for scars.
    • #2
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    I'd think "wow I'm not alone".
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    Wouldn't care at all. I would perhaps be a little sensitive to them and try to make sure they seemed happy etc if anything.
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    As they are healed and white I would just think you have had your problems but now you're over them.
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    I would not think anything of them based on their scars. Indeed I wouldn't care about them. I would just try and get to know the person like everyone else along my corridor.
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    people are more understanding than you think. no ones ever said anything to me. you catch them looking sometimes but ive noticed no change
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    If it was 2 years ago then yes I would be freaked out because before uni I had never even heard of self-harming.

    But now I wouldn't because I can see why people do it. I still don't understand or approve but some people do go through a tough time and relieve stress that way so it's none of my business if someone has scars on their arms.
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    I wouldn't be at all freaked out because i also self harmed for years.
    I wouldn't worry too much if i were you, i wear whatever i want whether scars are showing or not.
    I sometimes notice people looking, and a few ask me about it, so i'd say expect this to happen. But after i've explained to whoever has asked, theres no problem anymore.
    There might be the occasional idiot that thinks its all about attention seeking, but those kinda people aren't worth the effort!
    People most likely won't judge you at all so just be brave about it.
    Also well done on getting better
    :hugs:
    • #3
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    It wouldn't bother me at all. My sister used to self harm so I'm used to seeing scars and helping cover them, so it wouldn't phase me.
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    I certaintly wouldnt think less of the person I've seen many of my friends (and my sister) from school with scars, and when you can see theyre obviously pretty fresh it can be quite upsetting, but only because its sad that someone is going through that. I wouldnt expect someone to hide them away if they didnt want to though - in fact it might be better if they didnt because at least people will know and understand and can mabye help.
    I dont think many people will be shocked these days, so I really wouldnt worry if I was you
    • #4
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    A lot of people do judge you yes. Think your attension seeking etc (this is from experience). But let them get to know you before you reveal them.
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    I have a friend who has scars, it made her feel better if I didn't bring it up all the time s I've gotten used to it.
    I have loads of friends in the same situation and they'd do the same.

    ...if anyone's mean to 'em, they can answer to me.
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    I wouldn't be bothered in the slightest, it's quite commonplace these days anyway.
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    I'd be concerned, but if you explained that you had recovered and stuff, then it probably wouldn't phase me.
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    People who haven't encountered it before will be freaked out.

    I was when I found out my [now ex] girlfriend did it, it horrified and sickened me. I didn't let it show, but she could tell I didn't like it.

    Seeing scars on people still makes me feel sick, but I'm much better at not letting on.
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    Nope. Ive seen them before and no doubt I'll see them again.
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    (Original post by Kashya)
    Nope. Ive seen them before and no doubt I'll see them again.
    Not on you?
 
 
 
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