liamlarner
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im doing a past paper can someone mark my 12 marker response
this is all i could get done in 15 minutes that i had for the question

"the lords prayer is the only prayer Christians need to use"
Evaluate the statement
reasons for the statement
reasons against the statement
a justified conclusion

The lord's prayer is the most widely known prayer in Christianity and is said across most christian denominations

my justification on the statement is that i do not believe that the lord's prayer is the only prayer a christian needs to use because it is a model of a good prayer and not a prayer it's self the model is used for prayer as it combines praise to god with asking for one's needs as it is only a model i disagree with the statement

One hand for the statement could suggest that the lord prayer is the only prayer that needs to be followed because the lords prayer reminds Christians that god is the farther of the whole christian community and can create a sense of unity when everyone says it together, Furthermore an additional reason to why the lords prayer is the only prayer a Christian needs to use is the fact that the lords prayer is the only prayer that is very often used in worship it is also nearly always said at the holly communion, baptisms marriages and funerals and commemoration services in Britain.

On the other hand the lords prayer is very generalized and not specific enough and therefore because it is not specific enough it is too vague for it to be used as the only prayer also it goes against what Jesus said as in Matthew Jesus says "Do not say the same things over and over again" Matthew 6:7.

To conclude the lords prayer is not the only prayer a Christian needs to use because it goes against what Jesus said in Matthew and it does not go into enough detail therefore it is better to use a more generalized prayer when praying and do not use the lords prayer as it is only a model
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Snufkin
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username5104682
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(Original post by liamlarner)
im doing a past paper can someone mark my 12 marker response
this is all i could get done in 15 minutes that i had for the question

"the lords prayer is the only prayer Christians need to use"
Evaluate the statement
reasons for the statement
reasons against the statement
a justified conclusion

The lord's prayer is the most widely known prayer in Christianity and is said across most christian denominations

my justification on the statement is that i do not believe that the lord's prayer is the only prayer a christian needs to use because it is a model of a good prayer and not a prayer it's self the model is used for prayer as it combines praise to god with asking for one's needs as it is only a model i disagree with the statement

One hand for the statement could suggest that the lord prayer is the only prayer that needs to be followed because the lords prayer reminds Christians that god is the farther of the whole christian community and can create a sense of unity when everyone says it together, Furthermore an additional reason to why the lords prayer is the only prayer a Christian needs to use is the fact that the lords prayer is the only prayer that is very often used in worship it is also nearly always said at the holly communion, baptisms marriages and funerals and commemoration services in Britain.

On the other hand the lords prayer is very generalized and not specific enough and therefore because it is not specific enough it is too vague for it to be used as the only prayer also it goes against what Jesus said as in Matthew Jesus says "Do not say the same things over and over again" Matthew 6:7.

To conclude the lords prayer is not the only prayer a Christian needs to use because it goes against what Jesus said in Matthew and it does not go into enough detail therefore it is better to use a more generalized prayer when praying and do not use the lords prayer as it is only a model
Now obviously I am not an expert or teacher but I usually get 12/12 on these questions and have got 9s in all my mocks and end of unit tests . I think this is probably a 6 out of 12. There is clear reference to religion, a consideration of different points of view and some evidence in support which is really good. The framework is there, now you just need to refine it a bit.

I think the key things to improve on here are structure and use of evidence. The structure seems a bit odd, as I don't see the value of the justification paragraph? It felt a little confused but I can totally understand if it was something your teacher made you do. If you want to start out the question with a sort of evaluation/introduction I would keep it short to allow time for the main bit of the question. Stick to knowledge and key facts: The lord's prayer is the most widely known prayer in Christianity and is said across most christian denominations- then add some key facts like it is was the prayer taught by Jesus to his disciples and it is used in religious ceremonies. INTRO DONE.

Then try to stick to a clear structure of 4 short paragraphs (2x for, 2x against) and then a reasoned conclusion. If you're finding the paragraphs hard to structure in themselves then: take your point (e.g. yes, it unifies Christians under one prayer), add some key facts/elaborate (e.g. it allows them to ask for their basic needs together) and add quotes in to support (so for the basic needs one you might say 'Give us this day our daily bread.')

You have used some quotes, which is great but I really think adding in some more quotes, particularly from the prayer itself would bump it up. Remember, in order to get 10-12 marks you need: A well-argued response, reasoned consideration of different points of view. Logical chains of reasoning leading to judgement(s) supported by knowledge and understanding of relevant evidence and information.

Overall, I think 6 out of 12 is pretty strong but in order to improve it might be worth doing some more questions but allowing yourself unlimited time to plan and write them, until you feel like you can do them with your eyes closed!
Good luck!
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liamlarner
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(Original post by lhx212)
Now obviously I am not an expert or teacher but I usually get 12/12 on these questions and have got 9s in all my mocks and end of unit tests . I think this is probably a 6 out of 12. There is clear reference to religion, a consideration of different points of view and some evidence in support which is really good. The framework is there, now you just need to refine it a bit.

I think the key things to improve on here are structure and use of evidence. The structure seems a bit odd, as I don't see the value of the justification paragraph? It felt a little confused but I can totally understand if it was something your teacher made you do. If you want to start out the question with a sort of evaluation/introduction I would keep it short to allow time for the main bit of the question. Stick to knowledge and key facts: The lord's prayer is the most widely known prayer in Christianity and is said across most christian denominations- then add some key facts like it is was the prayer taught by Jesus to his disciples and it is used in religious ceremonies. INTRO DONE.

Then try to stick to a clear structure of 4 short paragraphs (2x for, 2x against) and then a reasoned conclusion. If you're finding the paragraphs hard to structure in themselves then: take your point (e.g. yes, it unifies Christians under one prayer), add some key facts/elaborate (e.g. it allows them to ask for their basic needs together) and add quotes in to support (so for the basic needs one you might say 'Give us this day our daily bread.')

You have used some quotes, which is great but I really think adding in some more quotes, particularly from the prayer itself would bump it up. Remember, in order to get 10-12 marks you need: A well-argued response, reasoned consideration of different points of view. Logical chains of reasoning leading to judgement(s) supported by knowledge and understanding of relevant evidence and information.

Overall, I think 6 out of 12 is pretty strong but in order to improve it might be worth doing some more questions but allowing yourself unlimited time to plan and write them, until you feel like you can do them with your eyes closed!
Good luck!
This is an improved response do you think this would gain more marks

The lords prayer is the most widely known prayer in Christianity and is said across most christian denominations. It is the prayer that Jesus taught to his disciples and is used in religious ceremonies

On one hand the lord's prayer is the only prayer a christian needs to use because it reminds Christians to forgive others in order to be forgiven because prayer is only effective if people's relationships with other's are right "forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sin against us"

On the other hand the lord's prayer is not the only prayer a christian needs to use because it is very generalized and not very specific which makes it a vague prayer therefore the lord's prayer should be used as a model only not a full prayer. In Matthew Jesus said "Do not say the same things over and over again" Matthew 6:7 using the lord's prayer as the only prayer would be going against and ignoring what Jesus said in Matthew

Furthermore, It is the only prayer a christian needs because it reminds Christians that God is the farther of the whole christian community "our farther in heaven, hallowed be your name" which for Christians can create a sense of unity

Finally to reach a Justified conclusion i think that the lord's prayer should be used as a model for prayer instead of being used as a full prayer it should be a building block for Christians for when the worship and prayer
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username5104682
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(Original post by liamlarner)
This is an improved response do you think this would gain more marks

The lords prayer is the most widely known prayer in Christianity and is said across most christian denominations. It is the prayer that Jesus taught to his disciples and is used in religious ceremonies

On one hand the lord's prayer is the only prayer a christian needs to use because it reminds Christians to forgive others in order to be forgiven because prayer is only effective if people's relationships with other's are right "forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sin against us"

On the other hand the lord's prayer is not the only prayer a christian needs to use because it is very generalized and not very specific which makes it a vague prayer therefore the lord's prayer should be used as a model only not a full prayer. In Matthew Jesus said "Do not say the same things over and over again" Matthew 6:7 using the lord's prayer as the only prayer would be going against and ignoring what Jesus said in Matthew

Furthermore, It is the only prayer a christian needs because it reminds Christians that God is the farther of the whole christian community "our farther in heaven, hallowed be your name" which for Christians can create a sense of unity

Finally to reach a Justified conclusion i think that the lord's prayer should be used as a model for prayer instead of being used as a full prayer it should be a building block for Christians for when the worship and prayer
This is looking much better I think this would probably get an 8 or 9/12. It has much more secure structure now, and the use of evidence from the Lord's prayer is really good. To push it up and gain those few more marks, I think you still need to extend your points more and add another against point.

If you're struggling to think of another against point, I would use 'It's not the only prayer a Christian needs to use because it's important for Christians to speak to God in their own way, using their own words.'. You could then talk about the personal relationship with God this creates. Your third paragraph is definitely the best in terms of extension. In the first para, you could add something about forgiveness being a key teaching to Christianity. In your para about God being the father, you could say that God is the most important part of the Christian faith so this makes it all the more important.

Your conclusion is looking pretty good too- just a few added sentences. I would again talk about personal prayer and relationship with God and how they may feel closer to God when praying in their own words.
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