I resent being born in a poor family Watch

hangulmaster
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I really really resent and hate my parents (my mom in particular for me being born into a poor family .
( my dad is not poor but refuses to help and I have no relationship ship with him)
My mum has made her relationship tension and financial problems my problem for almost 19 years. Whenever I was young I would always be hyper aware that money was tight and have that sick feeling about money and struggle . Whenever my mum would Buy my something it would always be like “ THAT COST £10 “ or “THAT COST £5” making the feeling of almost guilt that he gift wasn’t enjoyable because of the financial angst .
Where as some kids when there parents just bought them the latest phone and the kid wouldn’t even think twice they’d just take take and give no ****s about the value of it etc
Having the stress of being under intense financial pressure and also having two parents not get on has absolutely broken me and left me feeling extremely bitter and angry and full of rage hatred hopelessness

Recently things took a nose dive when my dad stopped giving my mum money that night she was sobbing and it absolutely ****ing tore my heart out to see my mum like that I was walking out in the dark and rain thinking to myself I want to take responsibility for this situation and thinking how I never want to see that look on my mums face ever again and that I would get rich or die trying and having a mental break down. She was on the phone to her mum ( my grandma) my mums parents have been supporting us a lot and I feel embarrassed and I think deep down my grandma feels very angry sad about the situation we are in for me and my brother
I am so pissed off at the cards I have been dealt in life .



I’m so scared of dying and aging because I feel so miserable and the prospect of comfort and security has so far gone. I feel like nothing good awaits me down the road and that I am the same person now in the future because the tide is against me due to being born with out money behind me. I will never find my happiness I will just die tormented .
I’m utterly terrified that I won’t get to do the cosmetic procedures that I want ( I want to get my teeth straightened because they are crocked and I want to get moles removed because I’m covered int them I have always been an ugly girl ) I want to fix these cosmetic issues. I be able to travel and feel happy I desperately want to travel to South Korea it’s been my big dream for almost 2 years.I’m absolutely done in Iv been plagued with depression having existential crisis feeling miserable my depression is so bad I wake up do nothing all day . or wake up really late can’t get out of bed because I’m so utterly defeated and despise everything. my whole being is full of pure hatred and anger for being born into this world with nothing ****ing backing me or helping me
I am supposed to deal with the poor socioeconomic situation my stupid ****ing parents created for me
I can not help but truly ****ing resent them for it I really hate them for it
Like the thought of getting some ****ing part time job that pays 7 an hour is ****ing useless it’s so unfair and cruel the world is so evil

My mum is the epitome of what it means to have a financially poor persons mind set
Which as what usually happens in this situation it’s passed on to the children and they follow in an endless poor cycle
However iv become acutely aware of this and been listening to many billionaires and millionaires and learning fast abijt white collar jobs corporate slavery and white collar jobs and know about rich persons mind set vs the one I have been born into I’m reading and listening to lots of successfully people and Trying to desperately fight my way out of poverty and head towards a rich life but it will probably fail or take a very long time
And due to my socioeconomic status my will and motivation has been extinguished and I feel utterly breathless and empty .
Poverty is a ****ing *****
Can anyone relate to this ?
Last edited by Interrobang; 1 month ago
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kkboyk
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You're just being incredibly pathetic and feeling jealous of those who are born to family who are financially stables. It's easy to blame your mother if you can't see from her perspective how much it's affecting her. Instead of blaming your mother, why not work on yourself by getting the help you need for your depression and then make a plan on how to make money to support yourself.

I also grew up in a household facing financially difficult (including struggles with mental health). Yeah it was difficult and sometimes I'd feel sad for not having enough funds to go out with friends occasionally, sometimes I'd feel like blaming my parents but when I got my first job at 16 I fully started understanding how hard they've been working and truly appreciated it (especially the long hours they worked). I provided funds for myself to survive throughout sixth form (including grants that all of them offer) and at uni by having part time jobs. Same with almost everyone else from the same background, and even those from well off family who still can't afford to live at uni. In fact many of those from middle class family have worked since they were 16 to fund for their needs. My gf's parents refused to give her any money at all despite being very well off, so she has been working since she was 14 (mostly during summer holidays) and have saved her money since then.

(Original post by hangulmaster)

Like the thought of getting some ****ing part time job that pays 7 an hour is ****ing useless it’s so unfair and cruel the world is so evil
This is one of the reason why I can't feel sympathy for you, even when I understand where you're coming from. You're refusing to change your situation and to not work hard enough purely because others don't have to. Nothing will change if you're unwilling to work or go through difficulties.

Listening to rich people and attempting to learn the "rich mindset" is pointless and won't make you richer. Majority of rich people defininitely do not have that mindset, nor do they think the same, but they possess enough financial literacy to maintain their wealth. It's mostly the poor that do, and 99.9% of them still remain poor. There's too many of these "get rich quick" schemes, offering the exact same advices that won't really make you rich, whilst profiting from it. What you should first start doing is working and saving enough of your salary to sustain yourself. Next is learning personal finance, in particular how to budget, banking products such as savings (you will need to research and find the best saving accounts you can open that offers the highest interest). If you have finished compulsory education or sixth form or college, then you should start considering what sort of career you want to increase your income. Once you've identifie what you want to do then its important to gain a higher qualification to improve your chances of getting a higher paying job. Once you have a career and stable income is coming, then you start making investments.

It's also important to know that the odds of you ending up being rich (that is a millionare) is extremely small, so its important to set realistic targets.
Last edited by kkboyk; 1 month ago
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londonmyst
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Start focusing on ways to achieve that holiday to South Korea
You can have excuses or you can have progress- but it is one or the other.
Time to snap out of the 'poor little me' forever wallowing in misery mindset combined with with frequent attacks of the green eyed monster.

My father and his younger brother were orphaned as children, survived on donated food from locals and had to leave school to earn money.
Neither of them had your negative attitude.
They both worked hard and made a lot of money.
You could do it too- you just have to have the ambition and work ethic.
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gjd800
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No

My lot were poor, just got on with it and went out working as soon as I could. I was 13/14 and labouring for brickies and concreters of a weekend doing hard work for 20 quid a day. That's about 2 quid an hour. Wise up
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just5moreMins...
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I haven't read the whole thing yet but mate.. I'm sure your situation would leave you feeling like **** but you're strong enough to rise above this. Practice empathy though.. it sounds like you don't have much of it. Life becomes easier when you have a better understanding of it.
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Johnny Tightlips
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(Original post by hangulmaster)
I really really resent and hate my parents (my mom in particular for me being born into a poor family .
( my dad is not poor but refuses to help and I have no relationship ship with him)
My mum has made her relationship tension and financial problems my problem for almost 19 years. Whenever I was young I would always be hyper aware that money was tight and have that sick feeling about money and struggle . Whenever my mum would Buy my something it would always be like “ THAT COST £10 “ or “THAT COST £5” making the feeling of almost guilt that he gift wasn’t enjoyable because of the financial angst .
Where as some kids when there parents just bought them the latest phone and the kid wouldn’t even think twice they’d just take take and give no ****s about the value of it etc
Having the stress of being under intense financial pressure and also having two parents not get on has absolutely broken me and left me feeling extremely bitter and angry and full of rage hatred hopelessness

Recently things took a nose dive when my dad stopped giving my mum money that night she was sobbing and it absolutely ****ing tore my heart out to see my mum like that I was walking out in the dark and rain thinking to myself I want to take responsibility for this situation and thinking how I never want to see that look on my mums face ever again and that I would get rich or die trying and having a mental break down. She was on the phone to her mum ( my grandma) my mums parents have been supporting us a lot and I feel embarrassed and I think deep down my grandma feels very angry sad about the situation we are in for me and my brother
I am so pissed off at the cards I have been dealt in life .



I’m so scared of dying and aging because I feel so miserable and the prospect of comfort and security has so far gone. I feel like nothing good awaits me down the road and that I am the same person now in the future because the tide is against me due to being born with out money behind me. I will never find my happiness I will just die tormented .
I’m utterly terrified that I won’t get to do the cosmetic procedures that I want ( I want to get my teeth straightened because they are crocked and I want to get moles removed because I’m covered int them I have always been an ugly girl ) I want to fix these cosmetic issues. I be able to travel and feel happy I desperately want to travel to South Korea it’s been my big dream for almost 2 years.I’m absolutely done in Iv been plagued with depression having existential crisis feeling miserable my depression is so bad I wake up do nothing all day . or wake up really late can’t get out of bed because I’m so utterly defeated and despise everything. my whole being is full of pure hatred and anger for being born into this world with nothing ****ing backing me or helping me
I am supposed to deal with the poor socioeconomic situation my stupid ****ing parents created for me
I can not help but truly ****ing resent them for it I really hate them for it
Like the thought of getting some ****ing part time job that pays 7 an hour is ****ing useless it’s so unfair and cruel the world is so evil

My mum is the epitome of what it means to have a financially poor persons mind set
Which as what usually happens in this situation it’s passed on to the children and they follow in an endless poor cycle
However iv become acutely aware of this and been listening to many billionaires and millionaires and learning fast abijt white collar jobs corporate slavery and white collar jobs and know about rich persons mind set vs the one I have been born into I’m reading and listening to lots of successfully people and Trying to desperately fight my way out of poverty and head towards a rich life but it will probably fail or take a very long time
And due to my socioeconomic status my will and motivation has been extinguished and I feel utterly breathless and empty .
Poverty is a ****ing *****
Can anyone relate to this ?
Why be so angry over something you can't control? Sure you haven't been dealt the best hand but you just have to get on with it like everyone else does. I mean, my mum grew up in poverty in a communist country; she had family members imprisoned for 30 years and had to queue for hours for a loaf of bread for there week meal, on top of working a job and juggling school. And she had it better then people who grew up in the middle of africa under a dictatorship. etc.

You can't choose the hand you were dealt but you can always choose how to play it.
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Bruinsgirl40
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I feel really sorry for your mum, do you think she wanted this life?

My family were poor, i grew up poor and started working from the age of 15, kids at school would have the weekends to hang out with their friends. Me? I would spend my weekends working 11 hour shifts as a pot washer.

Do i hate my parents for this? HELL NO. I love them more than you could ever imagine. Growing up poor has just made me more determined to make a name for myself and become successful.

Don't hate your mum, you don't know how long she will be around for.
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hangulmaster
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(Original post by Bruinsgirl40)
I feel really sorry for your mum, do you think she wanted this life?

My family were poor, i grew up poor and started working from the age of 15, kids at school would have the weekends to hang out with their friends. Me? I would spend my weekends working 11 hour shifts as a pot washer.

Do i hate my parents for this? HELL NO. I love them more than you could ever imagine. Growing up poor has just made me more determined to make a name for myself and become successful.

Don't hate your mum, you don't know how long she will be around for.
You dont understand I feel frustrated about the whole situation I feel angry that my mum is in this low income cycle because it affects her aswell I am very unhappy , frustrated and anxious about how she feels. at the same time i am frustrated about the whole thing low income and poverty does not do anyone any good EVER. i would not wish financial struggles on ANYONE
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Charlottelees
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I came from poor background. A single parent family. My dad never paid a penny for us.


I couldn't be more proud of my mum. The real life struggles, the hardships, the meals she missed. Life doesn't always go to plan for people, like you've so rightly said.

Family is important, more important than money.

Be responsible for yourself.... support your mum.

Stop looking back and looking forward, deal with the now.
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Bruinsgirl40
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(Original post by hangulmaster)
You dont understand I feel frustrated about the whole situation I feel angry that my mum is in this low income cycle because it affects her aswell I am very unhappy , frustrated and anxious about how she feels. at the same time i am frustrated about the whole thing low income and poverty does not do anyone any good EVER. i would not wish financial struggles on ANYONE
How about instead of being so hateful and holding all of this anger, you channel it into doing something productive?

Look ahead at your future, get a part time job whilst studying, it will make you understand how hard it is to manage money. Help your mum out, she is trying her best.

Study hard at school/college etc, go to University, become a success. Then maybe in 10 years you will have broken the cycle and be able to look back and go wow, i was really silly.
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FutureDoctor2020
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(Original post by hangulmaster)
I really really resent and hate my parents (my mom in particular for me being born into a poor family .
( my dad is not poor but refuses to help and I have no relationship ship with him)
My mum has made her relationship tension and financial problems my problem for almost 19 years. Whenever I was young I would always be hyper aware that money was tight and have that sick feeling about money and struggle . Whenever my mum would Buy my something it would always be like “ THAT COST £10 “ or “THAT COST £5” making the feeling of almost guilt that he gift wasn’t enjoyable because of the financial angst .
Where as some kids when there parents just bought them the latest phone and the kid wouldn’t even think twice they’d just take take and give no ****s about the value of it etc
Having the stress of being under intense financial pressure and also having two parents not get on has absolutely broken me and left me feeling extremely bitter and angry and full of rage hatred hopelessness

Recently things took a nose dive when my dad stopped giving my mum money that night she was sobbing and it absolutely ****ing tore my heart out to see my mum like that I was walking out in the dark and rain thinking to myself I want to take responsibility for this situation and thinking how I never want to see that look on my mums face ever again and that I would get rich or die trying and having a mental break down. She was on the phone to her mum ( my grandma) my mums parents have been supporting us a lot and I feel embarrassed and I think deep down my grandma feels very angry sad about the situation we are in for me and my brother
I am so pissed off at the cards I have been dealt in life .



I’m so scared of dying and aging because I feel so miserable and the prospect of comfort and security has so far gone. I feel like nothing good awaits me down the road and that I am the same person now in the future because the tide is against me due to being born with out money behind me. I will never find my happiness I will just die tormented .
I’m utterly terrified that I won’t get to do the cosmetic procedures that I want ( I want to get my teeth straightened because they are crocked and I want to get moles removed because I’m covered int them I have always been an ugly girl ) I want to fix these cosmetic issues. I be able to travel and feel happy I desperately want to travel to South Korea it’s been my big dream for almost 2 years.I’m absolutely done in Iv been plagued with depression having existential crisis feeling miserable my depression is so bad I wake up do nothing all day . or wake up really late can’t get out of bed because I’m so utterly defeated and despise everything. my whole being is full of pure hatred and anger for being born into this world with nothing ****ing backing me or helping me
I am supposed to deal with the poor socioeconomic situation my stupid ****ing parents created for me
I can not help but truly ****ing resent them for it I really hate them for it
Like the thought of getting some ****ing part time job that pays 7 an hour is ****ing useless it’s so unfair and cruel the world is so evil

My mum is the epitome of what it means to have a financially poor persons mind set
Which as what usually happens in this situation it’s passed on to the children and they follow in an endless poor cycle
However iv become acutely aware of this and been listening to many billionaires and millionaires and learning fast abijt white collar jobs corporate slavery and white collar jobs and know about rich persons mind set vs the one I have been born into I’m reading and listening to lots of successfully people and Trying to desperately fight my way out of poverty and head towards a rich life but it will probably fail or take a very long time
And due to my socioeconomic status my will and motivation has been extinguished and I feel utterly breathless and empty .
Poverty is a ****ing *****
Can anyone relate to this ?
I know easier said than done but it how you deal with it thats changes thing. I know many like yourself who have used this situation to work hard study hard and become professionals and earn a good wage. Obviously it would be nice to have those perks/ladders in life and the latest of things but people dont have things handed on a plate..
I know lots of people who come from 'rich' families but end up wasting their opportunities themselves and its only a matter of time when they make face the consequences cus bank of mum and dad doesn't last forever.
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tashkent46
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Mate stop slacking and just get born into like me. Don't know why you are moaning when some of us have real problems like deciding whether to go to Oxford or Cambridge because daddy can only pull one string.
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MidgetFever
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Honestly, stopped reading after the first paragraph.

Being hateful towards your mother doesn't solve anything, it's honestly pretty ****ty belittling her for this situation where it clearly wasnt her fault. Instead of acting like a whiney entitled kid, put some work into it yourself and see how difficult it is.

Edit: Just read more and I wish I hadn't. Cosmetic surgeries? Trips to Korea? Your parents shouldn't be paying for this stuff anyway. Your parents have provided a roof over your head and the necessities, some people don't even get that.

These extra things are YOUR responsibility to work towards.

For the record, I also came from a poor background, before I get the "you don't know what it's like" comment.
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DeesideEwan
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I think it’s wrong you that you “hate your mother”, I also think you have the wrong attitude in life. I never really had a family and was brought up in foster care, I never saw my real parents as they abused me. You need to appreciate your family more. Your parents shouldn’t be paying for trips abroad etc - save for them yourself!
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abcthe123
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Not from a well off family and I understand where you're coming from to some degree, however,

You said you wake up and do nothing all day. How about you get up and find a job and stop sobbing about something?

Even if you don't find one today, work on your CV. Work on your writing skills. Work on your interview technique. Work on your presentation. Work on your interests.

Seriously, you won't find any help here if you don't choose to help yourself.
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The_Lonely_Goatherd
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I'm sorry that you are feeling so depressed. It is hard when things feel futile, to get/keep going.

That said, I do agree with the other posters in here that the change needs to come from you. Being successful, imho, is less about having money than it is about one's attitude. Obviously having money helps out with quite a lot of things and makes the path easier. That said, it sounds to me that you are the one with the defeatist attitude, rather than your mum.

You are the only one who can break the vicious circle. Don't give up on your dreams but lower your immediate expectations. Get some help for your depression and as someone else said, start working out small steps to reach your goals of going to South Korea, etc. That probably will mean taking up a minimum wage job - at least for the time being - but everyone has to start somewhere and you can only get better-paying jobs with enough experience.

Someone famous (either Gandhi or Martin Luther King Jnr, can't remember) said "be the change in the world that you want to see". It's not fair that some people have a more privileged life than others, but bitterness will only drive you insane and make you resentful and twisted. Who loses out in that situation, when you're that jealous? You :sadnod:

Break the cycle and stop apportioning all the blame to your parents. Things can only get better if you try and help yourself.

(Disclaimer: I am from a poor family, so I really do appreciate what it's like to not have money for all the things you would like to have/do )
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juugsailorshawty
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run them studies!
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mgi
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(Original post by hangulmaster)
I really really resent and hate my parents (my mom in particular for me being born into a poor family .
( my dad is not poor but refuses to help and I have no relationship ship with him)
My mum has made her relationship tension and financial problems my problem for almost 19 years. Whenever I was young I would always be hyper aware that money was tight and have that sick feeling about money and struggle . Whenever my mum would Buy my something it would always be like “ THAT COST £10 “ or “THAT COST £5” making the feeling of almost guilt that he gift wasn’t enjoyable because of the financial angst .
Where as some kids when there parents just bought them the latest phone and the kid wouldn’t even think twice they’d just take take and give no ****s about the value of it etc
Having the stress of being under intense financial pressure and also having two parents not get on has absolutely broken me and left me feeling extremely bitter and angry and full of rage hatred hopelessness

Recently things took a nose dive when my dad stopped giving my mum money that night she was sobbing and it absolutely ****ing tore my heart out to see my mum like that I was walking out in the dark and rain thinking to myself I want to take responsibility for this situation and thinking how I never want to see that look on my mums face ever again and that I would get rich or die trying and having a mental break down. She was on the phone to her mum ( my grandma) my mums parents have been supporting us a lot and I feel embarrassed and I think deep down my grandma feels very angry sad about the situation we are in for me and my brother
I am so pissed off at the cards I have been dealt in life .



I’m so scared of dying and aging because I feel so miserable and the prospect of comfort and security has so far gone. I feel like nothing good awaits me down the road and that I am the same person now in the future because the tide is against me due to being born with out money behind me. I will never find my happiness I will just die tormented .
I’m utterly terrified that I won’t get to do the cosmetic procedures that I want ( I want to get my teeth straightened because they are crocked and I want to get moles removed because I’m covered int them I have always been an ugly girl ) I want to fix these cosmetic issues. I be able to travel and feel happy I desperately want to travel to South Korea it’s been my big dream for almost 2 years.I’m absolutely done in Iv been plagued with depression having existential crisis feeling miserable my depression is so bad I wake up do nothing all day . or wake up really late can’t get out of bed because I’m so utterly defeated and despise everything. my whole being is full of pure hatred and anger for being born into this world with nothing ****ing backing me or helping me
I am supposed to deal with the poor socioeconomic situation my stupid ****ing parents created for me
I can not help but truly ****ing resent them for it I really hate them for it
Like the thought of getting some ****ing part time job that pays 7 an hour is ****ing useless it’s so unfair and cruel the world is so evil

My mum is the epitome of what it means to have a financially poor persons mind set
Which as what usually happens in this situation it’s passed on to the children and they follow in an endless poor cycle
However iv become acutely aware of this and been listening to many billionaires and millionaires and learning fast abijt white collar jobs corporate slavery and white collar jobs and know about rich persons mind set vs the one I have been born into I’m reading and listening to lots of successfully people and Trying to desperately fight my way out of poverty and head towards a rich life but it will probably fail or take a very long time
And due to my socioeconomic status my will and motivation has been extinguished and I feel utterly breathless and empty .
Poverty is a ****ing *****
Can anyone relate to this ?
You sound like an ungrateful moaner to be honest! Why don't you show your parents how easy it is to mske lots of money? You have no clue sbout life yet!
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mgi
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(Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd)
I'm sorry that you are feeling so depressed. It is hard when things feel futile, to get/keep going.

That said, I do agree with the other posters in here that the change needs to come from you. Being successful, imho, is less about having money than it is about one's attitude. Obviously having money helps out with quite a lot of things and makes the path easier. That said, it sounds to me that you are the one with the defeatist attitude, rather than your mum.

You are the only one who can break the vicious circle. Don't give up on your dreams but lower your immediate expectations. Get some help for your depression and as someone else said, start working out small steps to reach your goals of going to South Korea, etc. That probably will mean taking up a minimum wage job - at least for the time being - but everyone has to start somewhere and you can only get better-paying jobs with enough experience.

Someone famous (either Gandhi or Martin Luther King Jnr, can't remember) said "be the change in the world that you want to see". It's not fair that some people have a more privileged life than others, but bitterness will only drive you insane and make you resentful and twisted. Who loses out in that situation, when you're that jealous? You :sadnod:

Break the cycle and stop apportioning all the blame to your parents. Things can only get better if you try and help yourself.

(Disclaimer: I am from a poor family, so I really do appreciate what it's like to not have money for all the things you would like to have/do )
Sorry, but that poster is just an entitlement whinger! And just when exactly was the world ever fair? And will that poster ever become a perfect parent him/herself? Parents actually owe their children nothing financially! Whingers need to get full time jobs before moaning!
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