The fewhale
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I’m currently a first year at Huddersfield. At the minute I have accommodation there.
However I come home every weekend for work and family time etc. It’s only been the first term and I’m fed up of commuting every week with a bag of clothes in hand when I only attended three times a week.
As well as this I am pretty miserable living out there and lonely. I have struggled to make friends on my course. Don’t get me wrong the friends I have made are really lovely people but I have been unable to connect with them and be more than course friends.
As well as this the people I live with seem to very anti social and don’t communicate with each other and I rarely see them which makes me even more lonely.
So for my second year I have been considering living at home and commuting.
I live on the outskirts of Sheffield.
This makes my journey by car 41 minutes. I am considering driving
If I take the train it is an hour and 13m give or take.
However, I’m still pretty stuck on the decision, as my parents are more worried of me getting stuck there if there’s floods or snow.
But if I’m miserable wouldn’t it be better to be happy ?
Please help!
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999tigger
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(Original post by The fewhale)
I’m currently a first year at Huddersfield. At the minute I have accommodation there.
However I come home every weekend for work and family time etc. It’s only been the first term and I’m fed up of commuting every week with a bag of clothes in hand when I only attended three times a week.
As well as this I am pretty miserable living out there and lonely. I have struggled to make friends on my course. Don’t get me wrong the friends I have made are really lovely people but I have been unable to connect with them and be more than course friends.
As well as this the people I live with seem to very anti social and don’t communicate with each other and I rarely see them which makes me even more lonely.
So for my second year I have been considering living at home and commuting.
I live on the outskirts of Sheffield.
This makes my journey by car 41 minutes. I am considering driving
If I take the train it is an hour and 13m give or take.
However, I’m still pretty stuck on the decision, as my parents are more worried of me getting stuck there if there’s floods or snow.
But if I’m miserable wouldn’t it be better to be happy ?
Please help!
If you have a car just drive.
Not that far and the risk of bad weather, then just stay on top of studies and let them know if you get stuck.
You can always take train if bad weather threatens.
You can also try and make things more sociable and try to make friends more.
Are you doing societies etc?
Alternatively get a studio and live on your own, which solves getting away from poor room mates but might be more lonely unless you make more of an effort to socialise outside course. If you are going home that often it gives the impression you arent settled and so bonding is more difficult.

Ask on here about driving issues. No idea about Sheffield to Huddersfield route and how often or how often the route is blocked. Just looks straight up the M1.

https://www.sheffieldforum.co.uk/for...p-discussions/
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The fewhale
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(Original post by 999tigger)
If you have a car just drive.
Not that far and the risk of bad weather, then just stay on top of studies and let them know if you get stuck.
You can always take train if bad weather threatens.
You can also try and make things more sociable and try to make friends more.
Are you doing societies etc?
Alternatively get a studio and live on your own, which solves getting away from poor room mates but might be more lonely unless you make more of an effort to socialise outside course. If you are going home that often it gives the impression you arent settled and so bonding is more difficult.

Ask on here about driving issues. No idea about Sheffield to Huddersfield route and how often or how often the route is blocked. Just looks straight up the M1.

https://www.sheffieldforum.co.uk/for...p-discussions/
The societies don’t really interest me , not a big fan of the town either. I’ve been out a few weekends there at the beginning of term and it was silent completely dead so decided it wasn’t for me.
I’m not a social butterfly either I find it hard to make friends outside my comfort zone.
The route isn’t bad I’ve been dropped off a few times before . My parents tend to avoid the motorway and go a more scenic way which is probably the better option some days rather than the motorway.
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999tigger
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(Original post by The fewhale)
The societies don’t really interest me , not a big fan of the town either. I’ve been out a few weekends there at the beginning of term and it was silent completely dead so decided it wasn’t for me.
I’m not a social butterfly either I find it hard to make friends outside my comfort zone.
The route isn’t bad I’ve been dropped off a few times before . My parents tend to avoid the motorway and go a more scenic way which is probably the better option some days rather than the motorway.
Well its not much of a surprise why you are lonely. Most likely it will continue the same way.
Why not seek a transfer for year 2 either back to Sheffield or similar?
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University of Huddersfield
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(Original post by The fewhale)
I’m currently a first year at Huddersfield. At the minute I have accommodation there.
However I come home every weekend for work and family time etc. It’s only been the first term and I’m fed up of commuting every week with a bag of clothes in hand when I only attended three times a week.
As well as this I am pretty miserable living out there and lonely. I have struggled to make friends on my course. Don’t get me wrong the friends I have made are really lovely people but I have been unable to connect with them and be more than course friends.
As well as this the people I live with seem to very anti social and don’t communicate with each other and I rarely see them which makes me even more lonely.
So for my second year I have been considering living at home and commuting.
I live on the outskirts of Sheffield.
This makes my journey by car 41 minutes. I am considering driving
If I take the train it is an hour and 13m give or take.
However, I’m still pretty stuck on the decision, as my parents are more worried of me getting stuck there if there’s floods or snow.
But if I’m miserable wouldn’t it be better to be happy ?
Please help!
Hi The fewhale,

I'm so sorry to hear that you're not happy at uni. If you would like to chat to anyone at the uni about this, please let me know. I don't like to think of students being miserable here.

I read your comments about clubs and societies not being for you, but our SU does have dozens of different groups you can get involved with, so there may well be one that's just right for you. A lot of them are quite small, so they're not too intimidating to get involved with so might be within your comfort zone.

It's the SU's Welcome To Term 2 series of events next week and on Monday there's a Get Involved Fair, which a lot of the clubs and societies will be at, so it might be worth a quick look to see if anything catches your eye. You can see more info about other stuff happening next week here: https://www.huddersfield.su/events?e...lcome-festival

As for commuting, we do have a lot of commuter students here at Huddersfield who live with parents and drive in or use public transport, so it wouldn't be unusual. Obviously I can't predict the weather (beyond saying we get a lot of rain here!) but I think it would be pretty unusual for flooding or snow to stop you getting home - you could always chat to your lecturers about not coming in and catching up should there be a bad weather forecast.

It's really important that you do what's right for you - yes, listen to other people's views as they might think of something you haven't, but the main thing is that you feel happy and settled.

I really hope you settle into uni life soon. It is a massive change coming to uni, but please know that there are people here you can chat to for help and support. Feel free to drop us a message, either on here or on social media, or pop to iPoint if you want to make an appointment to chat to someone.

Take care ,

Julie
UoH
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becca_grace
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(Original post by The fewhale)
I’m currently a first year at Huddersfield. At the minute I have accommodation there.
However I come home every weekend for work and family time etc. It’s only been the first term and I’m fed up of commuting every week with a bag of clothes in hand when I only attended three times a week.
As well as this I am pretty miserable living out there and lonely. I have struggled to make friends on my course. Don’t get me wrong the friends I have made are really lovely people but I have been unable to connect with them and be more than course friends.
As well as this the people I live with seem to very anti social and don’t communicate with each other and I rarely see them which makes me even more lonely.
So for my second year I have been considering living at home and commuting.
I live on the outskirts of Sheffield.
This makes my journey by car 41 minutes. I am considering driving
If I take the train it is an hour and 13m give or take.
However, I’m still pretty stuck on the decision, as my parents are more worried of me getting stuck there if there’s floods or snow.
But if I’m miserable wouldn’t it be better to be happy ?
Please help!
Hi, I have had a really similar experience to you, I lived in accommodation for my first year but kept my job at home on a weekend (I only live 40 mins away) so would come home on a Friday night and go back to uni on Sunday night or even Monday morning, carting a bag of washing with me every week. It got to the point where I would spend more time at home than I would at university. I went through a massive low in terms of my mental health because I would punish myself for not being able to fit in or have a normal social life like everyone else at the uni seemed to have, I couldn't immerse myself in the 'typical' student experience and started hating my whole experience there as a result.

By the end of first year I made the decision to fully move back home and started to commute to uni and I felt so much happier. I think you have to decide whether you're bothered about the social life of uni or whether you would rather get your degree and be happy. By the sounds of it, you arent that bothered by it, and if you think you would be happier at home then just go for it. You've got plenty of time later in life to move out and experience something more exciting, and you'll be able to save so much more money living at home than at university.

I am in third year now, and yes there are moments where I feel like I've missed out on the uni experience, but I know that it was the right decision for me. My mental health has been a lot better, my grades have improved and I've been able to focus more on my degree. I've saved money and been able to travel in the summers which I definitely wouldn't have done had I stayed at uni. In fact, after moving home, I decided to sign up to a volunteer trip and ended up going to India and having the time of my life with a group of students from Uni.

And just because you move home doesn't mean you have to sacrifice making friends at uni, its only your first term, you've got plenty of time to make friends and you can still join society's that interest you and just ask if you can hang out with your course mates outside of your seminars/lectures. My best friend from uni came from me asking someone I sat next to in a seminar if they wanted to go to the cinema, she's now my closest friend from uni, you just have to push yourself - even a little. And if you do want to go out once in a while, I'm sure people would let you crash on their floor for a night.

You just have to do what is right for you, and if at this moment in time, you think that moving home is right for you then I say go for it. You're at university to gain a degree and living there is not the be all and end all. At the same time though, you still need to make sure you push yourself a little outside your comfort zone and make some friends. Make the most of the opportunities that the uni gives you and you'll get everything and more from it- all while saving a bit of money and being happier at home with food cooked for you and less stress!

At the same time however, If you feel like you've just had a hard first few months, or just feel lonely, maybe try and stick it out and throw yourself into uni life while you're there, push yourself a little more, go to a club or society and you never know what will happen. If you can get a job in huddersfield then that would also make it easier to integrate a bit more if thats what you want as you'll be able to make friends that way and be able to have more of the social life of uni.

I would say maybe see how things go at the minute, and if you still feel the same way in a couple months then you know what to do. In conclusion - its totally up to you what you do and I hope this helps, or at least gives you another perspective xx
Last edited by becca_grace; 2 days ago
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The fewhale
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This has really helped, thank you!
May I ask how you commute to university and how the experience is ?
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becca_grace
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(Original post by The fewhale)
This has really helped, thank you!
May I ask how you commute to university and how the experience is ?
Hi,
At the moment I just go on the train and then get a bus to campus (which usually takes me c. 45 mins to an hour) but as I am starting to use my car more at home I am starting to drive to uni. Sometimes it is a bit of a pain using public transport as obviously you'll get delays or be waiting around a bit, but honestly you get used to it. I would say if you already use a car a lot at home its probably cheaper to just drive as you'd just be paying for train tickets on top of car insurance and petrol over the course of the year. But like someone else said, if you don't fancy driving in bad weather etc then you can always just go on the train the odd time or two.

One thing I would say is consider your timetable - my course means that this year i only have contact hours one day a week which and then its up to me if i want to go in extra and use the library and study, but most of the time I'll stay at home. Obviously if you're course has a demanding timetable (i.e. lots of 9ams and five days a week) then I would say it's maybe more practical to stay at uni, but if like me you only have a few days to actually go in, then waking up early for a couple of days a week really isn't that much of a hardship. My uni doesn't, but sometimes you can ask to change your timetable so all of your contact hours are grouped into certain days so I would also look into that. Also, if you don't fancy going into Huddersfield on your days off to study, then look into getting a Sconul Card - ask your University Library - as it allows you to go into other university libraries and use their facilities - you could go to Sheffield Uni as it would mean less travelling on your part.

Glad its helped honestly don't feel any pressure to stay at uni because that's the normal thing to do, if you're not that bothered by having the typical uni life that's fine - everyone's experience is different and while it took me time to get to terms with that I'm so glad I chose to move home. Don't stay in misery just to say you've done the uni experience if you think you'll be happier at home x
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The fewhale
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(Original post by becca_grace)
Hi,
At the moment I just go on the train and then get a bus to campus (which usually takes me c. 45 mins to an hour) but as I am starting to use my car more at home I am starting to drive to uni. Sometimes it is a bit of a pain using public transport as obviously you'll get delays or be waiting around a bit, but honestly you get used to it. I would say if you already use a car a lot at home its probably cheaper to just drive as you'd just be paying for train tickets on top of car insurance and petrol over the course of the year. But like someone else said, if you don't fancy driving in bad weather etc then you can always just go on the train the odd time or two.

One thing I would say is consider your timetable - my course means that this year i only have contact hours one day a week which and then its up to me if i want to go in extra and use the library and study, but most of the time I'll stay at home. Obviously if you're course has a demanding timetable (i.e. lots of 9ams and five days a week) then I would say it's maybe more practical to stay at uni, but if like me you only have a few days to actually go in, then waking up early for a couple of days a week really isn't that much of a hardship. My uni doesn't, but sometimes you can ask to change your timetable so all of your contact hours are grouped into certain days so I would also look into that. Also, if you don't fancy going into Huddersfield on your days off to study, then look into getting a Sconul Card - ask your University Library - as it allows you to go into other university libraries and use their facilities - you could go to Sheffield Uni as it would mean less travelling on your part.

Glad its helped honestly don't feel any pressure to stay at uni because that's the normal thing to do, if you're not that bothered by having the typical uni life that's fine - everyone's experience is different and while it took me time to get to terms with that I'm so glad I chose to move home. Don't stay in misery just to say you've done the uni experience if you think you'll be happier at home x
Thank you so much !! I drive my dads car at the minute but have been working a lot to save up for my own car for second year.
I’ve decided to stick out the rest of this term and next to see how I like it , but I think driving for me would be the best option as I’m in three days a week with one 9 am on a Wednesday which gets changed or cancelled every now and then 😂
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