Friend does not let me meet other friends Watch

albm04
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Hi, this is my first post here so sorry if I’ve done something wrong, but I have a friend (platonic) who does not let me meet or be friends with any of his friends. I think he says that it’s because he’s insecure, but I think it’s more of a control thing and whenever I do speak to any of his friends, he gets really upset and angry with me. I, however, want to be friends with them. What do I do?
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Anonymous #1
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Tell him he doesn't have ownership over you and your actions, and if he's going to continue getting angry at you then you shouldn't have to put up with it. Talk to him, and ask him why he reacts like that.
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Knockout
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Bring him with you
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MiaNova
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This does sound a little weird.
Maybe he likes you?
Otherwise why even care, especially if you're not trying to make anything romantic with his friends..?
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saltandshake
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(Original post by albm04)
Hi, this is my first post here so sorry if I’ve done something wrong, but I have a friend (platonic) who does not let me meet or be friends with any of his friends. I think he says that it’s because he’s insecure, but I think it’s more of a control thing and whenever I do speak to any of his friends, he gets really upset and angry with me. I, however, want to be friends with them. What do I do?
Sounds like a huge red flag - one of the first signs of an abusive relationship (platonic or otherwise) is controlling behaviour, and this person's attitude certainly falls into that category. It's never okay for anyone to control who their friend is seeing, in any circumstances, whether this person is "insecure" or not.

Be friends with his friends. If he's angry, and he no longer wants to be friends, you will have dodged a bullet. I'd seriously reconsider your relationship with this person.
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errrr99
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(Original post by saltandshake)
Sounds like a huge red flag - one of the first signs of an abusive relationship (platonic or otherwise) is controlling behaviour, and this person's attitude certainly falls into that category. It's never okay for anyone to control who their friend is seeing, in any circumstances, whether this person is "insecure" or not.

Be friends with his friends. If he's angry, and he no longer wants to be friends, you will have dodged a bullet. I'd seriously reconsider your relationship with this person.
genius
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mgi
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(Original post by albm04)
Hi, this is my first post here so sorry if I’ve done something wrong, but I have a friend (platonic) who does not let me meet or be friends with any of his friends. I think he says that it’s because he’s insecure, but I think it’s more of a control thing and whenever I do speak to any of his friends, he gets really upset and angry with me. I, however, want to be friends with them. What do I do?
You remind him that he does not own you! if he carries on making sad excuses for his controlling, insecure behaviour then you need to distance your relationship with him!
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_ah.nglquynh_
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(Original post by albm04)
Hi, this is my first post here so sorry if I’ve done something wrong, but I have a friend (platonic) who does not let me meet or be friends with any of his friends. I think he says that it’s because he’s insecure, but I think it’s more of a control thing and whenever I do speak to any of his friends, he gets really upset and angry with me. I, however, want to be friends with them. What do I do?
In my opinion that their are different kind of insecure: The kind of childhood you had, past traumas, recent experiences of failure or rejection, loneliness, social anxiety, negative beliefs about yourself, perfectionism, or having a critical parent or partner can all contribute to insecurity. Are the most common forms, so i think you should go and talk with him privately make sure that no one get in your conversation, stay in your true feeling that is help him to get better. Keep your emotions and voice as relax and help him to relax as you can. Being like that might help him to be honest of what he feels like and you need to keep telling him that “ what ever things happens I always stay at your side” so he will feel safe and trust you to tell you what happens or what he struggles with. Males is very easy to demonstrate just need to make him trust you he will being overcome and tell things. But if he not ready you need to give him time, don’t make him scared. And if you use this option you still need to be yourself. And you tell your self to keep being his friend and work things out or not, if you feel like you can give him the chance to change or not.
Hope you and your friend will work things out.
Last edited by _ah.nglquynh_; 1 month ago
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