Is it masculine for a woman to start of a handshake in a formal situation? Watch

Anonymous #1
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So I did this once about 6 years ago at a consultation with my doctor because I just wanted to get out of the room ASAP because I was getting really anxious and just wanted it to end but then later thought that was pretty masculine and didn’t wanted it to be interpreted as a dominant thing coming from myself, I like to think I’m pretty feminine but this has been bugging me ever since and keeps intruding into my mind and won’t go away and was wondering if it really was so I wanted to post this to see what others think. XnX
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Johnny Tightlips
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(Original post by Anonymous)
So I did this once about 6 years ago at a consultation with my doctor because I just wanted to get out of the room ASAP because I was getting really anxious and just wanted it to end but then later thought that was pretty masculine and didn’t wanted it to be interpreted as a dominant thing coming from myself, I like to think I’m pretty feminine but this has been bugging me ever since and keeps intruding into my mind and won’t go away and was wondering if it really was so I wanted to post this to see what others think. XnX
It's nearly 5 am and you're worrying about shaking some random person's hand 6 years ago?? Take a great big chill pill lmao

I wouldn't class hand-shaking as masculine. And yeah, ending the consultation early is pretty 'dominant'. You act like that's a bad thing? It's good to have a spine and act on what you want (as long as you are kind); this shouldn't be incompatible with being 'feminine'
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by frantika)
It's nearly 5 am and you're worrying about shaking some random person's hand 6 years ago?? Take a great big chill pill lmao

I wouldn't class hand-shaking as masculine. And yeah, ending the consultation early is pretty 'dominant'. You act like that's a bad thing? It's good to have a spine and act on what you want (as long as you are kind); this shouldn't be incompatible with being 'feminine'
I know it’s probably silly but I always swear the small stuff, I suffer from anxieties and always think of scenarios oh how I could have done it better, I don’t want to be seen as dominant because that’s not me it was due to my anxieties creeping in, I like to think of myself as quite docile in social and formal interactions and thought that it was quite aggressive for me and was thinking the doctor thought that too, even tho I will never see him again. It still worries me a lot :/
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I know it’s probably silly but I always swear the small stuff
Sweat* my bad
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Johnny Tightlips
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I know it’s probably silly but I always swear the small stuff, I suffer from anxieties and always think of scenarios oh how I could have done it better, I don’t want to be seen as dominant because that’s not me it was due to my anxieties creeping in, I like to think of myself as quite docile in social and formal interactions and thought that it was quite aggressive for me and was thinking the doctor thought that too, even tho I will never see him again. It still worries me a lot :/
Anxieties suck (I know well).
My belief is: if it doesn't help, why bother?

Worrying does not solve a single thing other then making you feel bad! So try not to waste time and energy on it, it literally helps you with nothing.
As for the social interactions: again, relax! Unless you were shouting at him/being abusive then it's not aggressive at all! The doctor probably didn't give it a single thought. And I'm sure if you were to explain at some point he'd understand.
General rule is in social situations: don't be a c*nt. Always be kind and nice, but being kind and nice does not mean be a pushover. Always stand up for yourself but always be nice Beyond that, it's out of your control what the other person thinks of you. And what they think really doesn't matter.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by frantika)
Anxieties suck (I know well).
My belief is: if it doesn't help, why bother?

Worrying does not solve a single thing other then making you feel bad! So try not to waste time and energy on it, it literally helps you with nothing.
As for the social interactions: again, relax! Unless you were shouting at him/being abusive then it's not aggressive at all! The doctor probably didn't give it a single thought. And I'm sure if you were to explain at some point he'd understand.
General rule is in social situations: don't be a c*nt. Always be kind and nice, but being kind and nice does not mean be a pushover. Always stand up for yourself but always be nice Beyond that, it's out of your control what the other person thinks of you. And what they think really doesn't matter.
But I’m not like that I’m quite the meek kind of person and don’t want offend anyone so avoid much social interaction because I don’t want offend anyone or give them a wrong impression and this is one of the things that has played on my mind a lot and is quite hard to just let go because I feel like it’s one of the things that defines me and I feel like I’m not like how I was 6 years ago tho my anxieties have worsen in general, it has been one of my major tipping points where it has made me who I am today which is very anxious shy person who is scared of interacting with people off the web because of being afraid that I would offend them in any sort of way. If that makes any sense.
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Johnny Tightlips
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(Original post by Anonymous)
But I’m not like that I’m quite the meek kind of person and don’t want offend anyone so avoid much social interaction because I don’t want offend anyone or give them a wrong impression and this is one of the things that has played on my mind a lot and is quite hard to just let go because I feel like it’s one of the things that defines me and I feel like I’m not like how I was 6 years ago tho my anxieties have worsen in general, it has been one of my major tipping points where it has made me who I am today which is very anxious shy person who is scared of interacting with people off the web because of being afraid that I would offend them in any sort of way. If that makes any sense.
Offence is taken, not given. The only way to not possibly offend someone is to not say a single thing!
I think (and I say this as someone who went through the exact same thing) you very much lack self-confidence. You have little self-belief so rely on the beliefs and thoughts of others to sustain you.
It's good that you care about being nice but ultimately you shouldn't live your life by how others define you. You should live it by how you define yourself. Because how can other people truly judge you? They know nothing about your life, who you are, how you think etc. You are the only expert of yourself. So (for example) you be nice by what you perceive to be nice, not what others perceive (unless they tell you lol).
Try and build self-confidence and belief in yourself. You do this by putting yourself out there in somewhat scary situations (like talking to strangers more). Then you'll realise that you are capable of doing these things and will be more confident in yourself.
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