Never had a female friend or gf in 10 years I'm 30 Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
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#1
I dont really approach or take the initiative.

I wait for the women to look at me back make eye contact.

I've read the dating books, improved my fashion sense, modelled men, looked into my body language, projections, social skills etc.

I think I'm a good guy with a lot of good qualities.

I've been to two counsellors and they say what is stopping you and they are only women.

I told them Its painful getting rejected and disheartening if you see others being succesful and I'm constantly not getting anything.

They say there is nothing wrong with me however.

Some women can be unkind?
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by phallusathena)
you're 30, and this website is used by gcse-uni students mostly, so a) how are we supposed to know, and b) why are you on the student room you weirdo?
Is it?
Hmm. I've come across a lot more uni age students than gcse students and chatted to people of all age ranges.
Plus there are different sections for different things. "Relarionships" is one of the sub categories after all.
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Anonymous #1
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I'm doing a uni degree.

Its wrong calling someone weirdo.
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sinfonietta
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#4
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You're not "getting anything" because you're not making the effort to interact with women. You can't sit there, do nothing, and wait for people to come to you.

These books and what not that you've read aren't working because you're not actually attempting to do anything with it..
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Anonymous #2
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#5
Yes I agree with sinfonietta. You aren't taking the initiative to do it.
I think you've answered your own question op.
Stay away from datimg books, they try to follow a "formula" which doesn't really work and if you come into things trying to to stick to a script it comes across as very insincere and women can tell straight away.
You're overthinking things way too much. You need to get out of your own head and just "do" it. When I wanted to overcome some of my shyness, I got my friends to take me out for a night to drink and dance. I'm generally fairly tightly wound ajd over think things a lot and was too shy to talk to men. But when I had something to drink it loosened me up a lot. Its a good starting point so you could try there
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Johnny Tightlips
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I dont really approach or take the initiative.

I wait for the women to look at me back make eye contact.

I've read the dating books, improved my fashion sense, modelled men, looked into my body language, projections, social skills etc.

I think I'm a good guy with a lot of good qualities.

I've been to two counsellors and they say what is stopping you and they are only women.

I told them Its painful getting rejected and disheartening if you see others being succesful and I'm constantly not getting anything.

They say there is nothing wrong with me however.

Some women can be unkind?
Absolutely nothing replaces going out there and making an effort. Sure you will probably be rejected many times to begin with. But you learn from your mistakes. It's a long journey but believe me with action you only go forwards.
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Anonymous #3
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I dont really approach or take the initiative.

I wait for the women to look at me back make eye contact.

I've read the dating books, improved my fashion sense, modelled men, looked into my body language, projections, social skills etc.

I think I'm a good guy with a lot of good qualities.

I've been to two counsellors and they say what is stopping you and they are only women.

I told them Its painful getting rejected and disheartening if you see others being succesful and I'm constantly not getting anything.

They say there is nothing wrong with me however.

Some women can be unkind?
The first line of your post says it all. If you don’t approach women or take any initiative at all then they’re not going to be waiting around for the guy that isn’t even looking at them.

“In ten years” means you had a GF / female friend when you were 20? If you could do it then, you can do it now. We all get rejected. Often. We all feel that same hurt. Girls and Guys but it’s not a good enough reason not to put yourself out there. Especially if being alone makes you so unhappy.

Those people you see being successful- they’ve been through that same hurt and rejection in the past too. It’s not as if the very first person we date is our forever person (at least not for the majority of people anyway) so rejection is, unfortunately, just a part of dating and finding the person who is right for you.

Gotta kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince as it were!
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baeoftae
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I dont really approach or take the initiative.

I wait for the women to look at me back make eye contact.

I've read the dating books, improved my fashion sense, modelled men, looked into my body language, projections, social skills etc.

I think I'm a good guy with a lot of good qualities.

I've been to two counsellors and they say what is stopping you and they are only women.

I told them Its painful getting rejected and disheartening if you see others being succesful and I'm constantly not getting anything.

They say there is nothing wrong with me however.

Some women can be unkind?
everybody please stop calling him a weirdo. This is the perfect site to discuss dating issues. PLEASE HAVE EYE CONTACT. OPEN YOUR EYES WIDELY AND FULLY AND MAKE EYE CONTACT TO THE OUTSIDE WORLD. your welcome in advance xxxx
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by baeoftae)
everybody please stop calling him a weirdo. This is the perfect site to discuss dating issues. PLEASE HAVE EYE CONTACT. OPEN YOUR EYES WIDELY AND FULLY AND MAKE EYE CONTACT TO THE OUTSIDE WORLD. your welcome in advance xxxx
Only 1 person called him that and 2 people defended him and gave advice. I agree though it is the perfect place to discuss.
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Bang Outta Order
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(Original post by phallusathena)
you're 30, and this website is used by gcse-uni students mostly, so a) how are we supposed to know, and b) why are you on the student room you weirdo?
Wow
(Original post by Johnny Tightlips)
Absolutely nothing replaces going out there and making an effort. Sure you will probably be rejected many times to begin with. But you learn from your mistakes. It's a long journey but believe me with action you only go forwards.
Do you have a gurlfran?
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Bang Outta Order
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You said it yourself that you "wait" for eye contact. Stop...waiting. trust me, have a bath and make a girl feel nice without acting too keen and you're golden.
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GatoMessi
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Maybe you have been looking at the wrong girls all the time. Maybe you are attracted to the "wrong" girls - "bad" girls?

Ever tried online dating?
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Johnny Tightlips
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(Original post by Bang Outta Order)
Do you have a gurlfran?
Nah I'm available, just say the word :kissing2:
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Bang Outta Order
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(Original post by Johnny Tightlips)
Nah I'm available, just say the word :kissing2:
Bruh...don't make me raise my voice in here
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Dunnig Kruger
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#15
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#15
You may have a lot of qualities, but 2 qualities you lack are

1 a positive (enough) outlook

2 Sales skills.

If you can, get both.
The positive outlook is an internal thing that you have to give yourself. You may have to decide to stop taking your life so seriously in order to get it.
The sales skills, if you can, get a job in direct sales. Even if it's just a part time job in addition to your main job or PhD research (or whatever you do for a living now).
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Johnny Tightlips
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(Original post by Bang Outta Order)
Bruh...don't make me raise my voice in here
We can go somewhere more private
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Bang Outta Order
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(Original post by Johnny Tightlips)
We can go somewhere more private
No we cain't!
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redheadisabella
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#18
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I dont really approach or take the initiative.

I wait for the women to look at me back make eye contact.

I've read the dating books, improved my fashion sense, modelled men, looked into my body language, projections, social skills etc.

I think I'm a good guy with a lot of good qualities.

I've been to two counsellors and they say what is stopping you and they are only women.

I told them Its painful getting rejected and disheartening if you see others being succesful and I'm constantly not getting anything.

They say there is nothing wrong with me however.

Some women can be unkind?
I think that maybe try opening up yourself to more sociable gatherings or parties? most people find connections in school or universities with finding opposite gender partners or female friends and if you have finished it may be harder, but maybe try taking initiative you may not necessarily get shut down
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Gkaori
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#19
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#19
Your problem is in the beginning of your post. Great you’ve worked on fashion and blah blah, but if you don’t make it happen it’s not gonna happen. The chances of a woman approaching your unprovoked are lower than being bitten by a shark.

If you find a woman attractive approach her, if she’s not interested keep going until you find one what is. It can be disheartening, but totally worth it when you find something real. Try online dating if face to face is difficult, but make the effort to meet them in person.
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