No friends at uni, depressed and lonely need help?

The answer is simple, you just need to meet people! Easier said than done, I can't bring myself to join a society because my social anxiety is just too bad and I can't stop believing that it's pointless and I'll just feel rejected after making small talk and 0 friends.

I'm in third year and still have no friends, so I know what it's like. But please be braver than me.

Some people make friends naturally by being in the right circumstances and it's not fair, but that's life Sometimes you have to ask for what you want. It doesn't make sense to be upset about having no social life if you behave in an anti social way.

You're very, very lucky to be attractive, give tinder a go if you havn't already, it can be an amazing way to meet people especially if you're good looking and it's much easier than starting conversations in real life, it's scary to make your account but once you do it's fine.

Overcoming social anxiety takes massive amounts of courage and bravery. I really hope you can find that courage, because it is inside you, you are capable of amazing things and have so much potential, you can run a marathon or win the olympics or do whatever you want if you apply yourself and change the way you think.

I also want to say, in case (like me) you can't overcome your social anxiety, that you need to stop having negative thoughts to be happier. I've moaned about my sad life a LOT over the past 4 years, and it took that long to realise how silly it is to say things like 'I'll never have friends'. It's like punching a bruise, makes it much more painful, what good could possibly come from it? Instead of being sad about having no girlfriend, flip it and look forward to when you do have a girlfriend instead (because you will!!) You can't control your desire but you can control your attitude and focus on the positive things you do have.

I hope this helped and let me know if you need someone to challenge your negative thoughts, I'm happy to talk whenever and for as long as you like

Just be brave and do things you'd never normally do, like saying hi to strangers. Say **** it and ask random people if they want to go out for a drink, a little weird and very awkward but you can only get so many No's and it might be the start of the best friend or the love of your life. Good luck and I really hope you find the love you deserve.

I'm really really sorry you're going through this, I know what it's like. What you're going through is not a waste, you will learn much more from this than partying all the time and being constantly happy. Most people, especially lucky ones who effortlessly make friends, don't think about improving themselves much at all, not in any meaningful way.

I didn't try improve myself in second year so you're WAY ahead of me and you have a very long time to still get what you want out of uni, if I had decided to change in second year I know I'd have gotten everything I wanted (just like you will!)

It would be great if uni could be the best time of everyone's life, but even if it's not that doesn't mean you have to miss out on anything. In a decade it will be a distant memory you hardly remember like primary school is now. If you're into club music you might know that people are still going out raving well into their 30s and 40s (and they have the best time )

Finding the strength to overcome these issues might seem impossible, but as long as you don't give up hope then you WILL get there. You will meet amazing people, have amazing sex, and have the best time with friends who love you, as well as fall in love several times. That's not happening tonight, and that's okay, because being lonely now means that you will appreciate and understand friendship on a whole other level when you find it, in a way other people could only wish for.

We need friendships as humans, but you should also know that friendships do not make you happy, neither does sex or relationships. In fact, relationships tend to make people very unhappy a lot of the time. It feels unfair to be left out on these basic things everyone else has, but when you truly appreciate that they don't make you happy, it's much harder to care. You have already found the key to happiness, which is focusing on becoming the best version of yourself.

It's tempting to say you will improve next week, but please try now. Your uni probably has a student support service, and I know that social anxiety makes it very hard to force yourself to go, but many people have these problems and that's why the support service is there, this is exactly their job, they are trained adult professionals at treating loneliness and if you can bring yourself to go there's a good chance they will change your life (depending on what uni)

In the moments like now, before you have made the change, force yourself to surround yourself with things that make you happy. Positive music, your fav tv shows, anything. And make the decision: 'tomorrow I will go to the support service'. Once you make the decision and plan for it, the job is done.

If you want to add me on facebook let me know or if you want to message me on here I will reveal my identity Sorry for writing so much I hope some of this encourages you to ask for things, be it friends or help and support.