Someone mark my eight marker Watch
imaginations soared, when the world was filled with stories which ran like gazelles and
pounced like tigers and exploded like rockets, illuminating minds and hearts. He had seen it
happen; had seen whole classes swept away in the fever. In those days, there were
heroes; there were dragons and dinosaurs; there were space adventurers and soldiers of
fortune and giant apes. In those days, thought Mr Fisher, we dreamed in colour, though
films were in black and white, and good always triumphed in the end.
How does the writer use language here to convey Mr Fisher’s views on
books and stories of the past?
You could include the writer’s choice of:
• words and phrases
• language features and techniques
• sentence forms
Above is the extract and question below will be my answer can someone roughly tell me how many marks I would get out of 8
The writer uses the metaphor "when books were golden". The use of the colour "golden" demonstrates that Mr Fisher may have seen the books as some kind of treasure which suggests he truly loved books of the past. The writer also uses another metaphor "when imaginations soared" which suggests he believes that authors of books in the past had good imaginations. In addition to this the writer uses a simile "stories which exploded like rockets" which demonstrates how fast paced the stories were. The writer also uses light imagery "illuminating minds and hearts" which suggests the stories had a positive effect on people.. Moreover the writer uses another metaphor "he had seen whole classes swept away in the fever which emphasizes how amazed people were. The use of long sentences which suggests the writer cant stop talking about stories in the past which further depicts his love for them.
What I would suggest is elaborating on all your points, so every time you use a quote you need to explain it more. you've got a good use of technical terminology but you're lacking analysis. I'd recommend adding an extra sentence after each quote and just taking your explanation further. Your second sentence is good and I'd recommend looking at that and trying to make your other sentences have that kind of analysis, if not more.
Also add an introductory and conclusion sentence at the beginning and the end. the introduction one should just be a general thing about the extract, like the main themes and what it's about. the conclusion one should just sum up your overall point. remember to link all your points together; at the minute they feel kind of like a bullet point list.
Hopefully this helps? As is said, I'd be happy to give you a mark and more advice if you want to re-draft it.