addicted to shopping... Watch

emmaoLiivxr
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#1
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#1
this is probably stupid
but basically i never have any money because as soon as i get any, i spend it all straight away
my parents try and keep my money from me but in the end they give in and let me have it because i go on too much
it’s so annoying because most the stuff i buy i don’t need and never use
has anyone got any advice on how i can save my money because at the moment when i get money i become obsessed with what i can spend it on

thanks in advance for any advice
E xxx
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Oxford Mum
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It sounds like you are a shopaholic because you just spend what you have on stuff as soon as you get paid. Maybe it makes you feel special when you bring home these purchases but it only gives you a temporary high, then you feel guilty. Your parents are trying to protect you by keeping your money back. Maybe just ask them to keep most of it back and just give you a little bit.

All this is ok when you are young, but what about when you are older and have responsibilities? What if you want to buy a house? Or if you have a child, and need to buy food and clothes for them, never mind treats like holidays?

I came from another generation and it shows in my spending habits. I worked for a bank and if we were 1p overdrawn we had to explain ourselves to the bank manager. We were terrified of our spending getting out of control. So we would save. I got into the habit of buying shares when I was in my twenties. The aim was to spend it on my children’s education, but my husband left me before then. He was a spendaholic who had gone through most of the cash, but my shares were used to buy me a house.

So even if you are feeling low, avoid that shopping centre like the plague, and save for something that will give you lasting joy.
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Karisa96
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I can relate to you.
I do love shopping, I must spend a fortune over a year on clothes, lingerie, hosiery,
I would probably class myself as a shopaholic, but one that has everything under control, lol.
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Lyndsey.95
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This is relatable to me. I love shopping, I'm always buying clothes and lingerie weekly. I must spend when I get money if there's something I really want. I'd describe myself as a shopaholic but a sensible one.
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Reality Check
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(Original post by emmaoLiivxr)
this is probably stupid
but basically i never have any money because as soon as i get any, i spend it all straight away
my parents try and keep my money from me but in the end they give in and let me have it because i go on too much
it’s so annoying because most the stuff i buy i don’t need and never use
has anyone got any advice on how i can save my money because at the moment when i get money i become obsessed with what i can spend it on

thanks in advance for any advice
E xxx
Why do you buy all this stuff you don't really want or need? Is it the buzz of finding something you really like in the shops and having something new - and that 'hit' wears off the moment you've got it home? Or are you a bit of a sales shopper, and that's where you get the buzz from?

Either way, I hope it's just earnings and not shopping being put on credit cards - for your sake.
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MoonlightRain
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This gone be me soon
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emmaoLiivxr
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#7
i just see something i like and i just buy it
i even think about it but always ending up buying whatever it is
but it makes me happy
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emmaoLiivxr
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i jist
(Original post by Reality Check)
Why do you buy all this stuff you don't really want or need? Is it the buzz of finding something you really like in the shops and having something new - and that 'hit' wears off the moment you've got it home? Or are you a bit of a sales shopper, and that's where you get the buzz from?

Either way, I hope it's just earnings and not shopping being put on credit cards - for your sake.
it’s not credit cards, if never do that
at the moment it’s just money i’m given because i’m in school and don’t have a job but i always get excessive amount of money from my family because they live quite far and we rarely see them
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burberry_butter
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I'm quite a shopaholic myself but lately I've calmed down.

I recommend you make a list of specific things you need and only shop from that. Also, perhaps you can set yourself a weekly budget on what you will spend on and allow your parents to keep the rest of the money in a savings account for you.

I recommend that you also get a part-time job if you don't have one already so that you can spend guilt-free but also understand the value of money.

Set a rule to only shop on things you need in sales and during seasonal change.

I know that from experience that shopping a lot can mean that there is a lot of clutter in your room and some areas are overly condensed. Try and tidy your room and declutter areas, wardrobe, dressing table etc. Donate things and this will help overcome your attachment to materialism.

If you get the urge to buy something try and do something else, like watch a movie, exercise or go for a walk, or just sleep on it. Also, try to avoid situations that make you want to shop in general; delete shopping apps from your phone and other devices. Avoid stores and shopping centres till you develop some self-control.

Always ask yourself before you buy something: Do I really need this? Will I feel good if I buy this? How much will I use this? How much money is coming to me in comparison to how much am I spending?

Always look at your bank balance and focus on saving it to a particular amount.

Lastly, remember that it's only stuff. Things come and go out of style all the time; if you think that you really like something but don't need it, just remember that there'll always be other new stuff coming out all the time, be it next week or next year. There'll always be chances to treat yourself to likely better things.

Hope this helps and good luck hun x
Last edited by burberry_butter; 5 days ago
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Allie4
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Can completely relate because this was me in my early 20s today, exactly the same story - I NEEDED to spend, it was such an urge. And as a result I never had any money. Even though your parents have tried stopping you you still spend. The problem lies with you, in order to change you need to change your mindset first. Just like with any addiction, you can only stop when YOU decide you are now ready to stop.

You need to force yourself really to go cold turkey, thats what I did. Sort of like taking a sip of something but then spitting it out, you need to walk into a shop, hold the stuff you want to buy but then place it back down and walk out. Even if it drives you insane, say No to yourself. Get a feel for the stuff but refuse to buy it. Then start saving the money in your house, thats when it puts into perspective what you've achieved. First you will save a couple of pounds, then you will save a whole £20 pounds. Then that 20 will turn into 40 and then 60 and then 100. When you're holding your first SAVED 100 pounds in your hands you will know that you HAVE the ability to abstain and say no and then it will turn into a challenge, lets see if I can get to 200 and then 500 and then 1000. Be warned though, there is a good chance you will go the other way and go from being a spendthrift to stingy, again thats what happened to me but only for a short while thankfully. When I saved together my first 10k I started having a better relationship with money, a good balance. And now I live within my means but of course spoil myself on occasion.

Anything is possible when you put your mind to it, you've got this ok! Starts by just saying NO.
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errrr99
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(Original post by emmaoLiivxr)
it’s so annoying because most the stuff i buy i don’t need and never use
has anyone got any advice on how i can save my money because at the moment when i get money i become obsessed with what i can spend it on
...
but it makes me happy
So it's annoying because you know it's wasteful...but it makes you happy? Is this "happy" feeling prolonged and meaningful?
Or is it just a relief from the obsession where you're searching for something to spend it on?

There are worse addictions to have! Think about the underlying feelings that make you want to spend, because they are the "triggers" for your addiction.

Then find an alternative behaviour (distraction/relaxation) to do when those feelings arise.
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MidgetFever
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How old are you?
I was honestly the same when I got my first job. I think it's partly the freedom of having all of this spare money in the first place and living at your parents, you have little financial responsibility so it literally does look like spare money.

I grew out of it when I moved out though, you quickly come to learn that it isn't financially viable.
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emmaoLiivxr
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i’m 15 and don’t even have a job
the money is what i am given by my family i don’t have any other way of earning money
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MidgetFever
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(Original post by emmaoLiivxr)
i’m 15 and don’t even have a job
the money is what i am given by my family i don’t have any other way of earning money
There's your issue then, you're young and haven't learnt the true value of money yet.

When you have to start to pay for your own things, bills and the like, your shopping habit will likely die down a bit.
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Sammylou40
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#15
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#15
(Original post by emmaoLiivxr)
i’m 15 and don’t even have a job
the money is what i am given by my family i don’t have any other way of earning money
It’s going to come down to willpower in the end.
I like to shop but I love used clothing. It’s cheap and environmentally friendly.
why not make your next shop charity shops only?
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sinfonietta
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(Original post by emmaoLiivxr)
i’m 15 and don’t even have a job
the money is what i am given by my family i don’t have any other way of earning money
This is a fairly normal approach to money for someone of your age. It'll become less of a novelty when you're an adult with regular income and rent/bills to pay.
Last edited by sinfonietta; 5 days ago
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The RAR
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The opposite for me, my parents complain I am not spending enough
I am the kind of person that likes to spend as little as possible, whoever's money is in my hand
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rcmotorboy
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#18
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#18
I wouldn't say you're addicted, maybe you're engaged into shopping. it happens. I'm the same. I can't stop purchasing some things because I know they would cost a lot more in the future, so I purchase them now.
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kekedoyouloveme?
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same girl i had to delete boohoo 😂😭 but we moveee
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A Rolling Stone
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#20
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#20
(Original post by emmaoLiivxr)
this is probably stupid
but basically i never have any money because as soon as i get any, i spend it all straight away
my parents try and keep my money from me but in the end they give in and let me have it because i go on too much
it’s so annoying because most the stuff i buy i don’t need and never use
has anyone got any advice on how i can save my money because at the moment when i get money i become obsessed with what i can spend it on

thanks in advance for any advice
E xxx
addictions are hard to break, it's sometimes not worth trying if you can simply find cheaper clothes, like from Amazon or ebay. increasingly, girls are making money on selling feet pics to creepy guys online or finding sugar daddies lol
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