Remembering everything when driving

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Caz 2020
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So basically, I recently started learning to drive . I ve had 43 hours so far and just feel like I’m not progressing now 😫. The trouble is when out on a lesson I completely forget basic stuff sometimes?? Even after this many hours ! I m still forgetting mirrors a lot and sometimes going into the wrong gear by accident . Parking I was quite good at at the beginning but since doing it over and over I think I overthink it , forget what I m doing and get it wrong !! It’s really getting me down .. I actually think I have some kinda problem because if you sit and ask me what I should do whilst driving I can tell you , I literally forget to do it when actually behind the wheel !! What is thattttt !! Help meeeeee 😢. Why am I forgetting standard stuff all the time ?
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Lilith32
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(Original post by Caz 2020)
So basically, I recently started learning to drive . I ve had 43 hours so far and just feel like I’m not progressing now 😫. The trouble is when out on a lesson I completely forget basic stuff sometimes?? Even after this many hours ! I m still forgetting mirrors a lot and sometimes going into the wrong gear by accident . Parking I was quite good at at the beginning but since doing it over and over I think I overthink it , forget what I m doing and get it wrong !! It’s really getting me down .. I actually think I have some kinda problem because if you sit and ask me what I should do whilst driving I can tell you , I literally forget to do it when actually behind the wheel !! What is thattttt !! Help meeeeee 😢. Why am I forgetting standard stuff all the time ?
Driving lessons take time and patients and you won't regret it at the end, and I would rather have loads of hours and be able to do all those things then not be good and you will have success it will just take time
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Caz 2020
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(Original post by Lilith32)
Driving lessons take time and patients and you won't regret it at the end, and I would rather have loads of hours and be able to do all those things then not be good and you will have success it will just take time
Yeah I will admit I am impatient with myself , but it just seems like when something new comes in the old stuff gets pushed out .. like I can’t retain all the information 😫. Some of it is nerves but I honestly think sometimes I m just thick 😢lol and that it’s not all piecing together . Is it normal to feel this way ?? Is it normal to forget basic stuff ? Arghhhh x
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bones-mccoy
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You're not thick. I was good at parking to begin with but then started overthinking it and got worse, so now I just have to stop thinking and go for it. Gears can be hard at first but you get so used to doing it you automatically get a feel for where the stick should be, having a mental image in your head will stop you from looking down but depending on the day and how I'm feeling it does sometimes take me a little longer. You'll eventually get to the point where things will come naturally and happen automatically, you'll use muscle memory so your feet will do what they're supposed to without even thinking, it really is just a matter of time. Do you practice outside of lessons?
Last edited by bones-mccoy; 1 month ago
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Caz 2020
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(Original post by bones-mccoy)
You're not thick. I was good at parking to begin with but then started overthinking it and got worse, so now I just have to stop thinking and go for it. Gears can be hard at first but you get so used to doing it you automatically get a feel for where the stick should be, having a mental image in your head will stop you from looking down but depending on the day and how I'm feeling it does sometimes take me a little longer. You'll eventually get to the point where things will come naturally and happen automatically, you'll use muscle memory so your feet will do what they're supposed to without even thinking, it really is just a matter of time. Do you practice outside of lessons?
I try to get practice in outside of lessons but rarely due to my husband working a lot and having young children ( don’t feel confident enough to have them in the back just yet ) and I gotta say when I do go with my husband I don’t seem to mess up so much .. sometimes my position is wrong but the overall drive seems less of a disaster than when with my instructor. 🙄. I am very much an overthinker , I over analyze everything and confuse myself ha .. makes it so much harder and sometimes makes me sound really dumb 😫. I know instructors are there to teach and iron out all the mistakes but I feel that they really knock my confidence and I make more mistakes because I m waiting for them to tell me I ve done something wrong again 🙄... sometimes I literally forget the most basic thing with an instructor and I dunno if it’s nerves or if I literally can’t retain the information. My feet are great they ve picked it up so fast , it’s gears and in very busy places with all traffic calming measures ( traffic lights , junctions and roundabouts ) I just go to jelly and mess something up ... I seem to start panicking and forget what I’m doing 😦.. xx
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aneblla
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watch YT videos some vids on there are great also if gears are a problem just drive auto
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J_M_01
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I totally can relate with how your feeling. I'm still continuing to learn to drive however it's been a long time and feel a lack of confidence. I make silly mistakes and forget simple things... I'm just trying not to give up as it's a great thing to be able to drive as it gives us more freedom. Just try and stick at it and try and be confident.
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_ap12
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Driving isnt about remembering. Its about doing it naturally. Theres just too many things to try to remember .You should try and deal with things as they come. This starts with looking as far as you can ahead into the road (forward planning).
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Caz 2020
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(Original post by J_M_01)
I totally can relate with how your feeling. I'm still continuing to learn to drive however it's been a long time and feel a lack of confidence. I make silly mistakes and forget simple things... I'm just trying not to give up as it's a great thing to be able to drive as it gives us more freedom. Just try and stick at it and try and be confident.
I m going to stick at it definitely but when I make silly mistakes it makes me feel so down . I have so much riding on passing the pressure is immense 😬😬.. I m scared of failing , I’m scared of being observed by an examiner the most .. I think the intensity of being watched every second for 40 minutes will end in disaster ha x
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(Original post by _ap12)
Driving isnt about remembering. Its about doing it naturally. Theres just too many things to try to remember .You should try and deal with things as they come. This starts with looking as far as you can ahead into the road (forward planning).
I’m slowly learning this , my planning ahead certainly needs to get better and I feel like I can do it better without pressure of an instructor 🙄.. I don’t work well under pressure of any kind lol x
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ohhello92x
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I know it doesn’t feel like it now, but it will come to you naturally. Are you able to practice outside of your lessons? If so it will help you massively. You’ll get there eventually, just need time and patience. I’ve had my licence for nearly 3.5 years and when I was learning to drive some lessons I’d forget little things but tried to not let it get to me.
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Caz 2020
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I think this is what I need , more lessons outside of instructed lessons, I gotta stop panicking so much in busy situations.. it’s like I get overwhelmed and don’t concentrate fully on what the roads are telling me 😫 because I m scared of doing it wrong so then I do !! X
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bones-mccoy
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(Original post by Caz 2020)
I try to get practice in outside of lessons but rarely due to my husband working a lot and having young children ( don’t feel confident enough to have them in the back just yet ) and I gotta say when I do go with my husband I don’t seem to mess up so much .. sometimes my position is wrong but the overall drive seems less of a disaster than when with my instructor. 🙄. I am very much an overthinker , I over analyze everything and confuse myself ha .. makes it so much harder and sometimes makes me sound really dumb 😫. I know instructors are there to teach and iron out all the mistakes but I feel that they really knock my confidence and I make more mistakes because I m waiting for them to tell me I ve done something wrong again 🙄... sometimes I literally forget the most basic thing with an instructor and I dunno if it’s nerves or if I literally can’t retain the information. My feet are great they ve picked it up so fast , it’s gears and in very busy places with all traffic calming measures ( traffic lights , junctions and roundabouts ) I just go to jelly and mess something up ... I seem to start panicking and forget what I’m doing 😦.. xx
I absolutely overthink everything when driving too (I come from a very academic, science-based background so figures) so it's taken me a long time to stop thinking so much and just doing. Which sounds terrifying but you have to have faith in yourself. I realllllly struggled with junctions at first and had to almost force myself to do things quickly, I always found there were so many different things to think about - slowing down, clutch in, indicating, changing gears, road position, creeping and peeping, turning enough when you come out - that my mind would just turn to mush so it'd take me like 12 seconds to come out of a quiet junction whilst I sat in the car thinking AHHHHH :lol:

So one lesson I had to tell myself beforehand that I was going to be faster and concentrated so hard I thought my head was going to fall off, but I did it! And now junctions are fine, I just have to be aware of my speed and how far in advance I should start slowing down when turning from a major road into a minor road. You sound like a good driver tbh you just lack confidence (like me!).
Last edited by bones-mccoy; 1 month ago
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MJ1148
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(Original post by Caz 2020)
So basically, I recently started learning to drive . I ve had 43 hours so far and just feel like I’m not progressing now 😫. The trouble is when out on a lesson I completely forget basic stuff sometimes?? Even after this many hours ! I m still forgetting mirrors a lot and sometimes going into the wrong gear by accident . Parking I was quite good at at the beginning but since doing it over and over I think I overthink it , forget what I m doing and get it wrong !! It’s really getting me down .. I actually think I have some kinda problem because if you sit and ask me what I should do whilst driving I can tell you , I literally forget to do it when actually behind the wheel !! What is thattttt !! Help meeeeee 😢. Why am I forgetting standard stuff all the time ?
I was exactly the same as you when learning, it’s really frustrating making the same mistakes over and over again. I would always forget to take off the handbrake, would never be able to reverse park and was bad at checking my mirrors. I think I did about 55+ hours in the end (lessons and driving in my own car with mum lol) and throughout that time I thought I would never pass my test. As my test got closer I trained myself to check my mirrors every time and did a couple of lessons where my instructor took me round some of the test routes, I also had a DVD which contained guidance for every situation and a mock driving test that you could watch. I passed my test with 7 minors even though I thought I’d failed. They don’t expect you to be perfect, they just want to make sure you are a safe and competent driver. Don’t lose hope and if you try and you really can’t pass then you could consider doing it in an auto, building up your confidence on the road and then trying again in a manual at a later date.
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Caz 2020
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(Original post by MJ1148)
I was exactly the same as you when learning, it’s really frustrating making the same mistakes over and over again. I would always forget to take off the handbrake, would never be able to reverse park and was bad at checking my mirrors. I think I did about 55+ hours in the end (lessons and driving in my own car with mum lol) and throughout that time I thought I would never pass my test. As my test got closer I trained myself to check my mirrors every time and did a couple of lessons where my instructor took me round some of the test routes, I also had a DVD which contained guidance for every situation and a mock driving test that you could watch. I passed my test with 7 minors even though I thought I’d failed. They don’t expect you to be perfect, they just want to make sure you are a safe and competent driver. Don’t lose hope and if you try and you really can’t pass then you could consider doing it in an auto, building up your confidence on the road and then trying again in a manual at a later date.
I m so glad it’s not just me ! The stuff is in there but sometimes I just don’t implement it ! Mirrors are a massive one 😫 Sometimes i feel like my lessons gone so bad I ve actually regressed! I get so frustrated, like why isn’t it just sinking in and naturally doing it by now !!! 😓😓 x
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Caz 2020
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(Original post by bones-mccoy)
I absolutely overthink everything when driving too (I come from a very academic, science-based background so figures) so it's taken me a long time to stop thinking so much and just doing. Which sounds terrifying but you have to have faith in yourself. I realllllly struggled with junctions at first and had to almost force myself to do things quickly, I always found there were so many different things to think about - slowing down, clutch in, indicating, changing gears, road position, creeping and peeping, turning enough when you come out - that my mind would just turn to mush so it'd take me like 12 seconds to come out of a quiet junction whilst I sat in the car thinking AHHHHH :lol:

So one lesson I had to tell myself beforehand that I was going to be faster and concentrated so hard I thought my head was going to fall off, but I did it! And now junctions are fine, I just have to be aware of my speed and how far in advance I should start slowing down when turning from a major road into a minor road. You sound like a good driver tbh you just lack confidence (like me!).
I m not academic hahahha I just over analyze everything and overthink what should be the simplest of tasks . What u describe is totally me ! Trying to think of 1000 things at once seems impossible 😖😖. And it makes it worse when I think I ve completed it just for the instructor to say I didn’t ( eg should of slowed down further Back , mirrors , position , handbrake on still ) then I get well annoyed with myself which makes me worse ! .. literally just cancelled tomorrow’s lessons coz I feel deflated and can’t be arsed to be told I’m rubbish 😬.. I ve not give up but need a break for a week I think 🤦🏻*♀️ X
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