How do I stop hating my appearance?

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Eveline_K_
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For example, Loran Gray. She’s gorgeous and perfect ugh. She has blue eyes and blonde hair and basically just looks like an angel and I’m so jealous. No hate on her by the way I think she’s super pretty and I just wish I looked like her. It honestly makes me really sad that I don’t like the way I want to look. Also her nose is cute and hate mine, cause I have a wider African nose (I'm Nigerian) I wish I looked completely different, I hate myself.
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kkboyk
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(Original post by Eveline_K_)
For example, Loran Gray. She’s gorgeous and perfect ugh. She has blue eyes and blonde hair and basically just looks like an angel and I’m so jealous. No hate on her by the way I think she’s super pretty and I just wish I looked like her. It honestly makes me really sad that I don’t like the way I want to look. Also her nose is cute and hate mine, cause I have a wider African nose (I'm Nigerian) I wish I looked completely different, I hate myself.
You should realise that her photos and media in general are heavily edited, plus makeup like many popular people. These people are in the 0.1%, whilst 90% of the rest of the population are average looking. Even worse, you're comparing to someone of a different ethnicity with opposite features which would do a lot more damage to your confidence. You should work on your self confidence by:

1. Getting involved in different activities (heavily recommended). group sports, volunteer work, book clubs, art classes- find other areas to build up your confidence and create new networks of friends.
2. Self grooming on a regular basis so that you feel you look your best. This also includes dressing your best. Exercise also helps in building confidence.
3. Unfollowing Loren Gray and other 'influencers' that set unrealistic standards. These sort of people tailor their media to give a particular outlook, which is quite frankly very negative for the regular person who becomes addicted to compare themselves to them in hopes of living the same lifestyle. If you are unwilling, I'd at least suggest to focus on those with the same ethnicity (who are more likely to share the same features as you) to at least give you a bit more confidence.

There's more to life than looks.
Last edited by kkboyk; 1 month ago
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AfricanDream
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(Original post by Eveline_K_)
For example, Loran Gray. She’s gorgeous and perfect ugh. She has blue eyes and blonde hair and basically just looks like an angel and I’m so jealous. No hate on her by the way I think she’s super pretty and I just wish I looked like her. It honestly makes me really sad that I don’t like the way I want to look. Also her nose is cute and hate mine, cause I have a wider African nose (I'm Nigerian) I wish I looked completely different, I hate myself.
I know it can be difficult at times to feel good about your appearance, believe me for many years throughout my teens I was desperate to look different, to even look more like my sister. It never felt great when my uncle said I was the clever one and my sister was the pretty one who was also clever. It did hurt and it did make me quite self conscious for a long time, I never thought I was pretty but now years later I feel like I think and look at things differently.

Try to think about something in your appearance that you do like, it could be a unique feature or just something that you don't mind. For me, I have always loved how thick and long my hair is and how quickly it grows. It was one thing that I was consistently complemented on throughout my childhood and teenage years. It makes me feel good while I am still not very fond of some of my other features. So I focused on my hair, because it felt like my armour- something I was in control of to a certain extent. Sometimes one feature that you feel particularly negative about may make you feel terrible overall as you are only focusing on that one aspect when in reality there is so much more to you. So try to look for the good in you

I honestly think that most people are not 100% happy with how they look and remember most of the time these celebrities have make up on - make up can make people look very different and can hide what might be considered flaws while enhancing other features.

There is beauty in being different, perfection is an opinion and we all know that opinions differ. What may be considered perfect to one person, others could think is flawed. Beauty to me is more then just looks, it is how you think and treat others, it is your personality, your quirks and charms. Conventional beauty in terms of looks often fades as you get older but inner beauty remains.:grin:

If we all looked the same the world would be a dull and boring place. I know it seems so easy to say don't hate yourself when in reality changing the way you think is challenging, I have been there.

You are beautiful, you just don't realise it yet.

Lots of love

AfricanDream
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Arthur_Morgan
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First off, don't compare yourself to others cos that's just gonna make you miserable. Easier said than done I know but it is attainable.

Secondly, cultivate self love. Pretty self explanatory. Lack of self love can lead to a negative self image.
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big-L
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african people are sooo beautiful
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