How do I write a good History answer for CIE A Level History?

So I did my AS History exam back in October and got a C. I was very disappointed since I've been getting A's in all my mocks and previous tests. I got a B in Paper 1 (the source question) and a C in Paper 2 so I only got the latter remarked but my grade remained the same.
The examiner report says that my answers lack focused support, seem assertive and are sometimes just narrative. However, in one question I included all the points mentioned in the mark scheme but still got an 11/20.
I'm assuming my format and/or style is incorrect and I don't back up my points enough and I think my History teacher hasn't been marking me very strictly or according to the assessment guidelines. The teacher also left my school right before the exams and the new teacher has no experience with CIE or actual teaching whatsoever and is of no help with this issue.
I've tried reading exemplars too but it's not helping.
I just want a B at this point because that's all I need for uni.
If anyone would be kind enough to give me any tips for the essay writing I would greatly appreciate it.

P.S I'm taking the Origins and Development of the Cold War component for Paper 3 and International History for Paper 4.

Reply 1

999tigger

Original post by Discombobulate_

You should do some googling, buy a book or just read through past threads.

I will give you some pointers, but have answered this question many times.

Doing History is very simply you simply read the question they give you, understand it and then answer that question in a structured and persuasive way by explaining the relevant issues and supporting them with evidence followed by an evaluation.

The examiner report says that my answers lack focused [ This is a failure either to understand what you are being asked or to provide an answer that is focused and giving them the answer, thus it will be unconvincing and a lot of time talking about irrelevant things that dont help you answer the question- the impact is you seem less convincing . ]

support, [ Alternatively it means you are making claims but then failing to back up with sufficient reasons, detail or supporting evidence] seem assertive and are sometimes just narrative [that means you make claims, but the examiner realises they are just claims and you dont back up with supporting reasons and evidence. Narrative means rather than seeking to analyse and explain your argument, you take a back seat and just describe events without much interest or conviction, you fail to address the question, which shows you dont understand what you are talking about, its more sub GCSE and not A level- In History I am more used to looking at the why, causes and consequences rather than just the what happened. Essays dont really ask you to describe an event, they want to know why things happened in your opinion]. However, in one question I included all the points mentioned in the mark scheme but still got an 11/20. [ You are not doing the above or explaining in sufficient depth I would guess].
I'm assuming my format and/or style is incorrect and I don't back up my points enough and I think my History teacher hasn't been marking me very strictly or according to the assessment guidelines. The teacher also left my school right before the exams and the new teacher has no experience with CIE or actual teaching whatsoever and is of no help with this issue.
I've tried reading exemplars too but it's not helping.

Exemplars wont help you.
You need to get good and understanding essay questions and then planning the answers. Once you have a plan its just a case of order, listing enough reasons, having your evidence and then your own intelligent evaluation. That will get you at least a B if you do the things suggested. Knowing the fundamentals of answering the question means you can answer any question and be roughly on target. Means less to learn and worry about.