What are your thoughts about parents on TSR?

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hannahgeo123
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I quite often see people post about their son/ daughter/ niece/ nephew etc on threads. Do you think that it is nice they are getting so involved in their childs life, or do you find it weirdly overbearing and pushy that they are posting on a site made for students? Just to clarify, I'm NOT talking about mature students who happen to be parents.
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username5027880
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I don't see it being a problem.
Nothing wrong with parents taking an active interest in there siblings.
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squeakysquirrel
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(Original post by hannahgeo123)
I quite often see people post about their son/ daughter/ niece/ nephew etc on threads. Do you think that it is nice they are getting so involved in their childs life, or do you find it weirdly overbearing and pushy that they are posting on a site made for students?
Also making assumption that parents cannot be students.

Many of the helpers on this forum are parents and provide invaluable advice.
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hannahgeo123
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(Original post by squeakysquirrel)
Also making assumption that parents cannot be students.

Many of the helpers on this forum are parents and provide invaluable advice.
Not making that assumption at all - I'm just referring to the parents who post on behalf of their children e.g in uni threads etc.
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Oxford Mum
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(Original post by hannahgeo123)
I quite often see people post about their son/ daughter/ niece/ nephew etc on threads. Do you think that it is nice they are getting so involved in their childs life, or do you find it weirdly overbearing and pushy that they are posting on a site made for students?
Yes, I often talk about my children and other people at Oxford, but this is to encourage others to apply.

My advice is so popular, I regularly have 500 pms in my inbox. I usually help at least 3 people a week via pms. I often hear from parents too, and because they and the students find me friendly and helpful, they normally email me more than once (sometimes about 3 times a day!)

Obviously I cannot help everyone to get in, but when I do, it makes me realise that what I am doing is not daft, but worthwhile. I love talking about Oxford anyway, and not many people in the town I live in are interested in it.

If there were no adults on TSR, it would be a fun site, but you would not get much expert guidance.
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username402722
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I think it is perfectly reasonable. They may also be students, be it at the Open University, somewhere such as Birkbeck, or as a traditional mature student.
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Andrew97
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This website is not for younger people exclusively. It is aimed at students which can both be young and older. Some parents may be here to give or get guidance. I know there are teachers around.

Being honest I barely post in study sections and I’m not a student. Does that mean I should close my account?
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Oxford Mum
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(Original post by Andrew97)
This website is not for younger people exclusively. It is aimed at students which can both be young and older. Some parents may be here to give or get guidance. I know there are teachers around.

Being honest I barely post in study sections and I’m not a student. Does that mean I should close my account?
Don't you dare close your account, Andrew! You are a TSR treasure.
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hannahgeo123
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(Original post by Andrew97)
Being honest I barely post in study sections and I’m not a student. Does that mean I should close my account?
(Original post by Oxford Mum)
If there were no adults on TSR, it would be a fun site, but you would not get much expert guidance.
Thanks for the thoughts guys, what you do is really helpful and I didn't intend to target this at anyone! One reason I posted this is because I was reading through an unofficial mark scheme after an a level, and there was a parent on there asking for as many answers as possible so that she could write them out and go through them with her daughter who had also sat the exam. Obviously I have no idea of her situation but the post came across as being very pushy.
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Oxford Mum
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(Original post by hannahgeo123)
Thanks for the thoughts guys, what you do is really helpful and I didn't intend to target this at anyone! One reason I posted this is because I was reading through an unofficial mark scheme after an a level, and there was a parent on there asking for as many answers as possible so that she could write them out and go through them with her daughter who had also sat the exam. Obviously I have no idea of her situation but the post came across as being very pushy.
I agree that is a bit extreme, but not every parent is like that, by a long chalk! I know some students are uncomfortable seeing their parents on the main threads, which is why I set up the Oxford Parents Association. It now has over 60K posts, and an equivalent thread has been set up for Cambridge now.

The great thing about TSR is that it is full of people from ALL ages and backgrounds, with different things to bring to the table. If I just lived my normal, narrow life, what chance would I have of meeting all the wonderful people on here?? And having such great conversations, such as this one?
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sinfonietta
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I feel parents who feel the need to take the lead in their child's education are likely doing so out of necessity rather than wanting to. eg they may be dealing with a teenager who is anxious, depressed, disabled, shy, lazy, apathetic, antisocial, bullied, unmotivated, unambitious, has unrealistic ambitions, etc.

As long as they're here with good intentions rather than to groom underage users then they're doing no harm.
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username2998742
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I think it would be better that if a kid had a question the kid were to ask it themself rather than have their parents ask for them, but of course I have no problem with it. TSR is a great community and parents are a big part of the community. There's even an entire forum for them!
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Andrew97
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(Original post by Oxford Mum)
Don't you dare close your account, Andrew! You are a TSR treasure.
I’m a treasure now am I? 😂

Thanks, right back at you.

(Original post by hannahgeo123)
Thanks for the thoughts guys, what you do is really helpful and I didn't intend to target this at anyone! One reason I posted this is because I was reading through an unofficial mark scheme after an a level, and there was a parent on there asking for as many answers as possible so that she could write them out and go through them with her daughter who had also sat the exam. Obviously I have no idea of her situation but the post came across as being very pushy.
That is a bit extreme granted.
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harrysbar
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(Original post by Oxford Mum)
The great thing about TSR is that it is full of people from ALL ages and backgrounds, with different things to bring to the table. If I just lived my normal, narrow life, what chance would I have of meeting all the wonderful people on here?? And having such great conversations, such as this one?
PRSOM I agree it is the diversity of people in the TSR community that makes it so much fun.

I think the site aims to be inclusive to everyone and manages it pretty well on the whole. If we started restricting who had the most "right" to post, where would it all end?
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bones-mccoy
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Parents can give different perspectives that are very valuable for some problems, issues or questions. There are some things that young students wouldn't understand or be able to justify unless they were a parent so it's good for educating. It's also nice that parents genuinely care so much about their son/daughter that they'd want to ask or double check with people of a similar age as their child, or who have experienced something similar, if they're doing the right thing or the best way to support them.
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Oxford Mum
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(Original post by harrysbar)
PRSOM I agree it is the diversity of people in the TSR community that makes it so much fun.

I think the site aims to be inclusive to everyone and manages it pretty well on the whole. If we started restricting who had the most "right" to post, where would it all end?
PRSOM
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Oxford Mum
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(Original post by bones-mccoy)
Parents can give different perspectives that are very valuable for some problems, issues or questions. There are some things that young students wouldn't understand or be able to justify unless they were a parent so it's good for educating. It's also nice that parents genuinely care so much about their son/daughter that they'd want to ask or double check with people of a similar age as their child, or who have experienced something similar, if they're doing the right thing or the best way to support them.
Some of the nicest, and the most useful PMs I have are from Oxford prospective parents.
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Gundabad(good)
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(Original post by hannahgeo123)
I quite often see people post about their son/ daughter/ niece/ nephew etc on threads. Do you think that it is nice they are getting so involved in their childs life, or do you find it weirdly overbearing and pushy that they are posting on a site made for students? Just to clarify, I'm NOT talking about mature students who happen to be parents.
Age is just a number.
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Reality Check
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(Original post by hannahgeo123)
Not making that assumption at all - I'm just referring to the parents who post on behalf of their children e.g in uni threads etc.
Yes, I know what you mean, and I think you have a point. On some of the Oxford and Cambridge entry threads this year (rather inevitably it would be them) I've seen parents acting rather like proxy applicants, helicoptering over their kids. I rather imagine the applicants themselves are blissfully chill about the whole thing, whilst the parent works themselves up into a frenzy wanting to know every statistic, anecdote and other tiny bit of information that they can use alongside their sharp elbows to give their kid that 'advantage'. I have to admit that I, too, find these sorts of parents overbearing and irritating.

However, I really do think these are in the minority, and most parents on TSR are on here to support their child and find out answers to perfectly reasonable questions. Many of these parents go on to support others (I'm looking at Oxford Mum here) invaluably. In fact, I would say that 95% of the best, most informed and 'valuable' members of TSR are parents. Were they all to disappear, this forum would literally turn into a joke.
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Oxford Mum
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(Original post by Gundabad(good))
Age is just a number.
That's made me feel better already
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