I said hurtful things to my bf

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Anonymous #1
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Report Thread starter 8 months ago
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I said some really hurtful things to my boyfriend today and I feel like I've been pestering him (while he has been at work bless him). I've been so nasty and I feel awful. This has come at a time when we were already going through a rough patch - we were certain on marriage before but have experienced a lot of downs recently so our future has been quite uncertain. It's mostly me that causes the issues as I have anxiety.

He has been super patient throughout but we both agree that I need to change. But today he's just had enough of me and wants space. When I ask him what's happening with us he won't give me a clear answer, but when I told him I want it to work out between us he told me he hasn't wasted a year for nothing. I told him I love him and he reciprocated, then I asked if he could meet this weekend and he said 'we'll see'. He wasn't up for talking on the phone today... I'm not sure what to do - should I just give him space then message him on friday asking if he wants to meet on the weekend?
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username5027880
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As difficult as it is, if he has asked for space, then I would be inclined to grant him that.
Better he figures things out in his own mind without any disruptions.
Give him a day or two, then send him a light hearted message and see what response you get.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Karisa96)
As difficult as it is, if he has asked for space, then I would be inclined to grant him that.
Better he figures things out in his own mind without any disruptions.
Give him a day or two, then send him a light hearted message and see what response you get.
Okay thanks. Does it sound like he's done?
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username47781
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I said some really hurtful things to my boyfriend today and I feel like I've been pestering him (while he has been at work bless him). I've been so nasty and I feel awful. This has come at a time when we were already going through a rough patch - we were certain on marriage before but have experienced a lot of downs recently so our future has been quite uncertain. It's mostly me that causes the issues as I have anxiety.

He has been super patient throughout but we both agree that I need to change. But today he's just had enough of me and wants space. When I ask him what's happening with us he won't give me a clear answer, but when I told him I want it to work out between us he told me he hasn't wasted a year for nothing. I told him I love him and he reciprocated, then I asked if he could meet this weekend and he said 'we'll see'. He wasn't up for talking on the phone today... I'm not sure what to do - should I just give him space then message him on friday asking if he wants to meet on the weekend?
what do you expect, you pestered him so much, if I was him I would do the same or worse. Give him space then after a couple days apologise and grovel to him.
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username5027880
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Okay thanks. Does it sound like he's done?
Not necessarily, a few days to clear his head may make all the difference.
Just remember to let him be, he may even contact you. Hope all works out okay.
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MidgetFever
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I think you just need to give him a little space to think about things, he's said he loves you and wants to work on it so the best thing you can do right now is respect his wishes.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Rock Fan)
what do you expect, you pestered him so much, if I was him I would do the same or worse. Give him space then after a couple days apologise and grovel to him.
Thank you. Planning on grovelling when I (hopefully) see him
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Karisa96)
Not necessarily, a few days to clear his head may make all the difference.
Just remember to let him be, he may even contact you. Hope all works out okay.
(Original post by MidgetFever)
I think you just need to give him a little space to think about things, he's said he loves you and wants to work on it so the best thing you can do right now is respect his wishes.
Okay, thank you. I am planning on sending him good morning and good night messages still...I think by leaving him alone he'd hopefully be more willing to meet up too. thanks
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Misaela
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Well think of it if you were in his shoes. How would you feel and what would you want your partner to do.

But if I were you I'd give him his space but I'd tell him I'm sorry before I have him his space. There's this boy I know he likes spending time with me but I became a bit too much later. I wanted his full attention and kept pestering him. At one point he asked me for space kind of. And truthfully when he said the words I felt hurt. I don't know if it showed on my expression but I recovered quickly. I smiled at him and said Oh okay. I have him his space and went to do my own thing.
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Anonymous #1
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Thank you
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Misaela
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Is like to meet a girl that has never pestered her significant other. I have never heard of it.
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Anonymous #1
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It was extreme though lol
(Original post by Misaela)
Is like to meet a girl that has never pestered her significant other. I have never heard of it.
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Misaela
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(Original post by Anonymous)
It was extreme though lol
Perhaps I was extreme as well. Maybe it's a fault women have.
( I'm sorry to my significant other but I crave attention and I might lose control hiding it sometimes which results in pestering.)
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mgi
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I said some really hurtful things to my boyfriend today and I feel like I've been pestering him (while he has been at work bless him). I've been so nasty and I feel awful. This has come at a time when we were already going through a rough patch - we were certain on marriage before but have experienced a lot of downs recently so our future has been quite uncertain. It's mostly me that causes the issues as I have anxiety.

He has been super patient throughout but we both agree that I need to change. But today he's just had enough of me and wants space. When I ask him what's happening with us he won't give me a clear answer, but when I told him I want it to work out between us he told me he hasn't wasted a year for nothing. I told him I love him and he reciprocated, then I asked if he could meet this weekend and he said 'we'll see'. He wasn't up for talking on the phone today... I'm not sure what to do - should I just give him space then message him on friday asking if he wants to meet on the weekend?
He needs space and an apology from you. He should not marry you too soon. You have issues and you are taking them out on him.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by mgi)
He needs space and an apology from you. He should not marry you too soon. You have issues and you are taking them out on him.
Okay thanks. I have apologised a lot. Do you think 3 days is enough space?
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mgi
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Okay thanks. I have apologised a lot. Do you think 3 days is enough space?
Yes, 3 days and then meet up with him if possible. And it sounds like you love him so you should remember that he is your best friend and so he deserves your best treatment.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by mgi)
Yes, 3 days and then meet up with him if possible. And it sounds like you love him so you should remember that he is your best friend and so he deserves your best treatment.
Okay thanks. I really do. He has actually just messaged me now so that’s promising!
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mgi
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Okay thanks. I really do. He has actually just messaged me now so that’s promising!
That's good. I am glad for you. You must remember to save your nicest and best behaviour for the ones you love the most!
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by mgi)
That's good. I am glad for you. You must remember to save your nicest and best behaviour for the ones you love the most!
Thank you! Do you think I should ask him today about meeting on the weekend, or save it for tomorrow?
Sorry for all the questions - last one promise
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mgi
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Thank you! Do you think I should ask him today about meeting on the weekend, or save it for tomorrow?
Sorry for all the questions - last one promise
You could ask him today. He will probably be happy with your idea of meeting up.
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