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Ex girlfriend of 2 years dumped me via text and never saw me again. Why?

Hello,

I will keep this as brief as possible as I'd quite like some opinions as to why this happened.
Last year about 7 months ago, my ex girlfriend of 2 years (after a few weeks of arguing) decided to dump me via text out of the blue. This was of course really painful at the time and still is a bit even now. I was hopeful we could meet to talk it out after being together for 2 years. But she didn't. She never saw me again or spoke to me. Even two months later I wanted closure and she never replied to that. I went completely silent since.
Note: I just want to add at the time she was working a full time internship and part time job at the weekend. So obviously this may have affected things as the argument was about seeing each other more.
Now I still think about why this happened and although there could be many answers, I am curious as to what others might think about this. I personally feel like she took the cowards way out and was never really right for me anyway but we did have a nice 2 years.
I am more or less over it but from time to time it does cross my mind and I am moving on nicely and in a much better frame of mind so this is more for my curiosity and no bitterness.

Thanks for any replies.
Reply 1
Original post by Anonymous
Hello,

I will keep this as brief as possible as I'd quite like some opinions as to why this happened.
Last year about 7 months ago, my ex girlfriend of 2 years (after a few weeks of arguing) decided to dump me via text out of the blue. This was of course really painful at the time and still is a bit even now. I was hopeful we could meet to talk it out after being together for 2 years. But she didn't. She never saw me again or spoke to me. Even two months later I wanted closure and she never replied to that. I went completely silent since.
Note: I just want to add at the time she was working a full time internship and part time job at the weekend. So obviously this may have affected things as the argument was about seeing each other more.
Now I still think about why this happened and although there could be many answers, I am curious as to what others might think about this. I personally feel like she took the cowards way out and was never really right for me anyway but we did have a nice 2 years.
I am more or less over it but from time to time it does cross my mind and I am moving on nicely and in a much better frame of mind so this is more for my curiosity and no bitterness.

Thanks for any replies.

What are you expecting us to say?
How are we supposed to know why you broke up, or why she decided to never see you / talk to you again?

What kind of answers do you think complete strangers will be able to come up with versus you, who knew her and know the background to it all?

It's not healthy to obsess about it this much, especially this long after it happened.
Just move on, focus on your career and job and eventually you may find her or someone else. It's not worthwhile thinking about her. She will realize what she's has done, so being patient doesn't harm much :smile:
(edited 4 years ago)
Reply 3
Original post by Drewski
What are you expecting us to say?
How are we supposed to know why you broke up, or why she decided to never see you / talk to you again?

What kind of answers do you think complete strangers will be able to come up with versus you, who knew her and know the background to it all?

It's not healthy to obsess about it this much, especially this long after it happened.

That kind of goes for all breakups obviously and I am not obsessing per say. I am just curious as to what people would think. It just ended like that and since we all have free time I think it was worth asking.
I kind of feel you're going down harsh on me here, I just wanted to know what people might think and suggest. She was a major part of my life.
However, I agree it is not health to obsess this much.
Reply 4
Original post by Boost Pressure
Just move on, focus on your career and job and eventually you may find her or someone else. It's not worthwhile thinking about her. She will realize what she's has done, so being patient does harm much :smile:

Thanks. I am doing just that and I do feel better but I think it occasionally just crosses my mind and wondered if others have had this experience.
Reply 5
Original post by Anonymous
That kind of goes for all breakups obviously and I am not obsessing per say. I am just curious as to what people would think. It just ended like that and since we all have free time I think it was worth asking.
I kind of feel you're going down harsh on me here, I just wanted to know what people might think and suggest. She was a major part of my life.
However, I agree it is not health to obsess this much.

Narrow down your question, then.

Are you asking people why you broke up (I hope not, because how the hell are we supposed to know?), or are you asking why there's been no contact since?

I'm not being harsh, I'm trying to get you to think about whether these questions will actually help you.

...and a little bit about the pointlessness of asking people who know nothing about the pair of you, your relationship, or how it ended, to explain the details of all three to you.
Original post by Anonymous
Thanks. I am doing just that and I do feel better but I think it occasionally just crosses my mind and wondered if others have had this experience.


That's the spirit :five:
Thanks for sharing your experience with us. It means a lot to us and you :smile: Hope you can come around a solution to it in the near future :smile:
Reply 7
For some reason when love fades it is often quite sudden a brutal. Girls seem particularly prone to a snap change of heart. Almost the more happy and intense it was in the good times the more extreme the dumping behaviour. Hard to understand, I too like closure and have naively hoped that good relationships must end at least with some happy banked memories and friendship. Not so, a friend explained it philosophically to me as 'relationships burn out'. Good news that you have moved on. New, and better, love comes and helps too.
(edited 4 years ago)
Reply 8
Original post by Drewski
Narrow down your question, then.

Are you asking people why you broke up (I hope not, because how the hell are we supposed to know?), or are you asking why there's been no contact since?

I'm not being harsh, I'm trying to get you to think about whether these questions will actually help you.

...and a little bit about the pointlessness of asking people who know nothing about the pair of you, your relationship, or how it ended, to explain the details of all three to you.

What I am trying to get to the bottom of is why people might think she never replied to me again or even had the ability to speak to me in person.
Reply 9
Original post by Zarek
For some reason when love fades it is often quite sudden a brutal. Girls seem particularly prone to a snap change of heart. Almost the more happy and intense it was in the good times the more extreme the dumping behaviour. Hard to understand, I too like closure and have naively hoped that good relationships must end at least with some happy banked memories and friendship. Not so, a friend explained it philosophically to me as 'relationships burn out'. Good news that you have moved on. New, and better, love comes and helps too.

Many thanks for your response. This certainly does help me.
It is difficult to offer relevant suggestions without knowing anything about the personalities of you&your ex, the quality of the relationship and how compatible you were.
Maybe she got angry about something, decided that it was best to end the relationship and never re-establish contact.
Or met someone else, ended things with you to get into a new relationship and decided to avoid all contact with you to make herself feel better?
She dumped you because she was sick and tired of arguing with you. There may have been other reasons on top of that.

She went completely silent because she anticipated having an argument with you about the separation. And she was sick and tired of arguing with you.

It's also possible that she met someone else. For example via her work. In those circumstances it's understandable that she'd feel that it wouldn't be appropriate to talk to you.

Her wanting a clean and total break from you is understandable. Talking to you would just open up old wounds for her.
Original post by londonmyst
It is difficult to offer relevant suggestions without knowing anything about the personalities of you&your ex, the quality of the relationship and how compatible you were.
Maybe she got angry about something, decided that it was best to end the relationship and never re-establish contact.
Or met someone else, ended things with you to get into a new relationship and decided to avoid all contact with you to make herself feel better?

I see where you're coming from but she never deleted me off social media and kept all pictures. Would you suggest deleting her?
That must suck tbh, if she had ended things properly I don't think you would still be thinking about it, I don't blame you for wondering what happened when someone is as rude as to do that.

From my pov as a gf, I would only end things like that with my bf if I was really struggling to break up but knew I had to, and would find it difficult not to come back if we had an argument and he wanted me to stay

Maybe for her it was just easiest to move on with her life and cut off her feelings but just running away and never looking back. But it's selfish imo. On the other hand she might have realised she didn't truly love you anymore.

Maybe she was fed up of arguing and didn't see the point in continuing the relationship if you both wanted different things.
Original post by Anonymous
I see where you're coming from but she never deleted me off social media and kept all pictures. Would you suggest deleting her?

Not necessarily deleting her, unless you prefer that.
But at least muting her account so you don't receive any more updates about her life.

I don't have any ex's on social media because most of them don't use it and a few accounts were setup years after the relationship ended.
Whenever I've dumped a bf, I stayed in contact unless I physically couldn't bear to be in the same room or listen to further nonsense about religion/conspiracy theories.

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