Have i caused him to cheat?

Basically ive been in a relationship for 2years with my bf. we have just come back from holiday and im due to go to uni next month which is far away. to test him i created a facebook account and added him. hes responed and has said he is single. i did this as ive had trust issues in the passed with finding texts on his phone. do u think ive done wrong or shal i just ditch him please help! thankyouuu

Reply 1

DeSiFiEd

2

lmao, they do this type of thing on TV to catch bf's that would cheat. If he could do that to a fake person, surely when he's out and about etc..he'd do the same.

If you can't trust him..end it, its not your fault..its his.

Reply 2

Psorian

8

Confront him with it first... As I doubt he can talk this right, ditch him afterwards.

Reply 3

PoisonDonna

14

Okay so tricking him isn't good. But you found out he's being a bit of a rat so that's not good either. You're gonna have to ask him. If there's no trust there's nothing, unfortunately.

Reply 4

Reflexive

14

diagnosis: no trust, prognosis: bleak

Reply 5

Bear_Grylls

19

Just dump him, your off to uni, so have a fresh start,

Reply 6

missygeorgia

18

Seems your trust issues weren't unfounded, and while there were probably better ways to go about it I don't blame you for making the account and I would be very upset if my boyfriend did that to me. I'd say talk to him, and don't let him blame it on you.

Reply 7

strawberryblue

OP

Psorian

Confront him with it first... As I doubt he can talk this right, ditch him afterwards.

thankyou for your reply. do u think i should say i made a fake account i might seem a bit of phsyco lol.

Reply 8

AmberB

He said that he's single even though he's in a 2 year relationship with you? :eek:

What cheek. I don't know what I'd do in your situation to be honest, that sounds awful and I'd be so angry if I were you. To be honest, if you don't feel like you can trust him, then I'd end it. Especially if he's done things in the past that aroused your suspicions. I'd try and talk to him about it, just don't tell him about the fake account as that would seem bad on your part. It's a tricky situation really..

Reply 9

cherrybella1

Id be tempted to try it on with him using this fake account, see how he reacts... I wouldnt say anything yet. Just out of sheer nosieness, what sort of texts did you find?

Reply 10

UltimateJ

2

Just split up. Its obviously not a happy relationship. Alternatively you could talk things through...

Reply 11

strawberryblue

OP

cherrybella1

Id be tempted to try it on with him using this fake account, see how he reacts... I wouldnt say anything yet. Just out of sheer nosieness, what sort of texts did you find?

thats what i was thinking ive said things that would relate to me as in mentioning schools and stuff. this way i could find him out by him dropping himself in it about knowing someone that i know. maybe if i do this and then ditch him

Reply 12

Psorian

8

strawberryblue

thankyou for your reply. do u think i should say i made a fake account i might seem a bit of phsyco lol.

You could always say you made that fake account just for fun or something, but if he really is willing to cheat on you then you shouldn't even have to defend yourself because he really is the one who is the biggest basterd in this case...

Also, I agree that this is also a good excuse to dump him before going to uni because of the fresh start you will be able to have there :wink:

Reply 13

Jennie1987

17

Id blame him for your trust issues- important not to let this be passed forward to your next relationship- and quite frankly I dont know what you are asking ppl for- DUMP HIM. I agree with DeSiFiEd it is totally shakey to say it online to a stranger but he must be doing the worst when he is out and about with ppl. I know its hard and you kind of feel guilty but even if he is adament he hasnt done anything he obviously has been thinking about it/getting close/done stuff HE doesnt class as wrong. And you wouldnt be able to trust him at all if you carry on and then you are going to feel like the inevitable break down of the relationship is more so your fault.

Get out while you still might have some good stuff for yourself, by waiting you could have no self-esteem/trust/confidence in yourself and other relationships or even friendships!

Reply 14

Jennie1987

17

If you want mention the fake account but he could use this to make you feel bad, tell other ppl who may side with him or something. Just dump him over not trusting say you heard hed cheated on you or that you know the 'girl' who is the fake account. Dont drag it out longer, maybe invite him out then a bit of public humiliation like a pint in the face/lap/over the head and a good slap before you storm out.

Reply 15

jennyng2000

11

ditch him
you didnt make him cheathe chose to

Reply 16

kookoo_koochoo

1

arrange to meet up with him on this fake account and then YOU should go, as the real you and DUMP him.

Reply 17

cherrybella1

strawberryblue

thats what i was thinking ive said things that would relate to me as in mentioning schools and stuff. this way i could find him out by him dropping himself in it about knowing someone that i know. maybe if i do this and then ditch him

Yea.. I mean its probably morally not the right thing to do... but if you're going to uni soon and you arent sure whether or not you can trust him, then I really would just see how far he's prepared to go with this 'fake' person!
Unless you somehow get found out beforehand, there's only one of two outcomes... either he'll behave and remember he has a girlfriend! Or he'll prove that he's not too fussed about staying faithful, in which case you'll know whether you should be with him or not :smile: