What should be my next step for religious dating?

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Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 8 months ago
#1
So i’m 22 and am looking for something serious dating wise and i’m looking for someone of the same religion which is Sikh. I genuinely one someone from the same religion as there is a lot of culture that people who are Sikh are usually punjabi and it’s a big part of my life. Iv never had a GF or really a female friend before this so i’m not the most experienced either.

So Iv just finished my final year at Uni, sadly with no luck but i’m planning on doing a masters degree. Slightly due to a lack of trying but it’s not like I didn’t try, maybe just not enough. But I was really shut down before I could really show off any personality probably due to looks.

Over the last few months iv been trying online dating and the only girls who I have literally matched and spoke to were older than me about 25 and either didn’t realize my age at the time and just unmatched or stopped replying due to that I think. But today on all 4 of my dating apps I have literally swiped every single Sikh girl I could and there’s no more matches left. So in essence i’v failed at dating apps.

I know this was wrong but I did widen filters too see if I was just ugly and tried to match other girls and I wasn’t getting 100s of matches but I got way more than the matches with Sikh girls while swiping far less girls.

So what does a failure like me do next? Iv failed at Irl dating and online dating, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with my personality so i’m guessing it’s my looks. Do I save up for some plastic surgery and try again or do you have any suggestions for me please?
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londonmyst
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What are your dating deal-breakers apart from a sikh girl in her early 20s from a punjabi background and looking for a serious relationship with a view to marriage?
Are you willing to date a sikh girl who eats all meat, a sikh girl whose family tree includes interfaith marriages or a sikh girl who is very traditionalist and supports an independent khalistan?
Any preferences about education, career ambition, hobbies or sexual history?
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Marshmallow98
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Honestly, the biggest tip I can give, stop looking. Stop trying to force something, because honestly you can really tell when a guy is getting desperate. Not every girl is interested in looks alone and seriously do not save up for plastic surgery just because random people you have come across in a few years don't find you attractive. You have the rest of your life to be tied to someone and I can genuinely say from experience the right person will come along when you stop looking and trying to force something to happen. Be open to meeting people but don't go into it with the sole goal of dating them, get to know people and understand them, as well as yourself, before pushing any relationships. You're 22, not 40, you have a career ahead of you, new horizons, new openings and constant chances to meet new people. You're not going to find the person (unless you're very very lucky) straight away by forcing it and trying to seek it, let it come to you. When the right person comes along, you'll know, and until then, just be you! No surgery, don't change yourself for anyone else except yourself.

You're going on to do a masters, so focus on your degree and your career and future, let everything else fall into place. You're not missing out and what is meant to be will be, so just let it happen. If you keep seeking it you will come across as desperate and depending on where you are, girls talk and know each other, especially within smaller communities, so the last thing you want is that reputation. Just be open to new things but focus on your education first, because juggling a Masters and a new relationship is not for the faint hearted, trust me, and just see where life takes you. Good luck!
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Anonymous #1
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Report Thread starter 8 months ago
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(Original post by londonmyst)
What are your dating deal-breakers apart from a sikh girl in her early 20s from a punjabi background and looking for a serious relationship with a view to marriage?
Are you willing to date a sikh girl who eats all meat, a sikh girl whose family tree includes interfaith marriages or a sikh girl who is very traditionalist and supports an independent khalistan?
Any preferences about education, career ambition, hobbies or sexual history?
Honestly I dont have many expectations, apart from them. Just attractions and the one thing which puts me off is being overweight, which you might think is harsh but that’s just my preference. Anything is fine, i’m not sure fussy
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Anonymous #1
#5
Report Thread starter 8 months ago
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(Original post by Marshmallow98)
Honestly, the biggest tip I can give, stop looking. Stop trying to force something, because honestly you can really tell when a guy is getting desperate. Not every girl is interested in looks alone and seriously do not save up for plastic surgery just because random people you have come across in a few years don't find you attractive. You have the rest of your life to be tied to someone and I can genuinely say from experience the right person will come along when you stop looking and trying to force something to happen. Be open to meeting people but don't go into it with the sole goal of dating them, get to know people and understand them, as well as yourself, before pushing any relationships. You're 22, not 40, you have a career ahead of you, new horizons, new openings and constant chances to meet new people. You're not going to find the person (unless you're very very lucky) straight away by forcing it and trying to seek it, let it come to you. When the right person comes along, you'll know, and until then, just be you! No surgery, don't change yourself for anyone else except yourself.

You're going on to do a masters, so focus on your degree and your career and future, let everything else fall into place. You're not missing out and what is meant to be will be, so just let it happen. If you keep seeking it you will come across as desperate and depending on where you are, girls talk and know each other, especially within smaller communities, so the last thing you want is that reputation. Just be open to new things but focus on your education first, because juggling a Masters and a new relationship is not for the faint hearted, trust me, and just see where life takes you. Good luck!
Yeah very true, I don’t want to build a bad rep which could be bad. Honestly I have followed that advice of not looking before and in my final year of Uni it’s hit me, it’s not happened so I need to look before it’s too late. Which has suddenly put me into a panic
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