Why am I like this?

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Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 5 months ago
#1
I have always been such a hopeless romantic. Ever since I was in Year 7, I would always chase after guys (who didn't like me back), and having a boyfriend was my goal during secondary school. It wasn't for physical needs or anything, I'd never even kissed anyone during secondary school. When I was 14 I became very good friends with a guy and developed a crush on him, which lasted for 3 years. Though we were never together I felt like I loved him, it felt like we were an item and that we were destined to end up together at some point. It felt like a real breakup when he got a girlfriend and I was so heartbroken at the time.

I'm 20 now and am with my first boyfriend who I met at uni. We've been together for over a year, and I'm so happy. For the first time, I somehow wasn't looking for anything and he came into my life.

My issue is that I tend to take things way too seriously. Even with my crushes. Whenever I had a crush on someone, I would think that they're 'the one', which looking back just seems so naive. At the moment, I do feel like my boyfriend is 'the one', but I don't know if it's because 1 year seems so long as it's my first relationship. I know I probably shouldn't think that way as I'm still young and have so much time. I'm just worried that if this ends I'm gonna be so crushed - if I was so heartbroken over my crush getting a girlfriend, how much more a real breakup?

I went to an all-girls school in primary school, and going into a mixed school for the first time in secondary school some people found it weird how I'd never had a boyfriend (I wouldn't have bothered wasting my time with 1 week relationships though tbh) so maybe that sparked everything...Also, I have a great relationship with both of my parents and we have a happy home life together, so I'm not lacking affection in my life either.

I just really don't understand why I've always been like this, I find it weird and am just trying to understand myself. Does anyone have any advice on how I can take it slow in my current relationship? I'm worried I'm rushing things and don't want to ruin this!
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Surnia
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What kind of things do you think you're rushing?

There don't seem to be any major issues if a relationship is 1 year and counting...
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Anonymous #1
#3
Report Thread starter 5 months ago
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(Original post by Surnia)
What kind of things do you think you're rushing?

There don't seem to be any major issues if a relationship is 1 year and counting...
I keep thinking about marriage already...I’m more embarrassed about how I’ve acted before when I was so boy crazy and thought every guy I liked was ‘the one’. I’m worried my boyfriend would think that I was desperate and am only with him because he’s the only boy who has reciprocated his feelings ☹️
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Rxma
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#4
Report 5 months ago
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I have always been such a hopeless romantic. Ever since I was in Year 7, I would always chase after guys (who didn't like me back), and having a boyfriend was my goal during secondary school. It wasn't for physical needs or anything, I'd never even kissed anyone during secondary school. When I was 14 I became very good friends with a guy and developed a crush on him, which lasted for 3 years. Though we were never together I felt like I loved him, it felt like we were an item and that we were destined to end up together at some point. It felt like a real breakup when he got a girlfriend and I was so heartbroken at the time.

I'm 20 now and am with my first boyfriend who I met at uni. We've been together for over a year, and I'm so happy. For the first time, I somehow wasn't looking for anything and he came into my life.

My issue is that I tend to take things way too seriously. Even with my crushes. Whenever I had a crush on someone, I would think that they're 'the one', which looking back just seems so naive. At the moment, I do feel like my boyfriend is 'the one', but I don't know if it's because 1 year seems so long as it's my first relationship. I know I probably shouldn't think that way as I'm still young and have so much time. I'm just worried that if this ends I'm gonna be so crushed - if I was so heartbroken over my crush getting a girlfriend, how much more a real breakup?

I went to an all-girls school in primary school, and going into a mixed school for the first time in secondary school some people found it weird how I'd never had a boyfriend (I wouldn't have bothered wasting my time with 1 week relationships though tbh) so maybe that sparked everything...Also, I have a great relationship with both of my parents and we have a happy home life together, so I'm not lacking affection in my life either.

I just really don't understand why I've always been like this, I find it weird and am just trying to understand myself. Does anyone have any advice on how I can take it slow in my current relationship? I'm worried I'm rushing things and don't want to ruin this!
Omg this sounds like me. Like I could have written this. I’ve been wondering exactly the same thing recently, why am I like this? You’re not alone
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