Do you know anyone who is asexual/aromantic?

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Castor989
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What are they like as a person?
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AnonymousNoMore
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I would actually like to see if there was any science backing to asexuality or whether it's because of past trauma and such.
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Castor989
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(Original post by AnonymousNoMore)
I would actually like to see if there was any science backing to asexuality or whether it's because of past trauma and such.
Yes, it's interesting. I think it does exist but it is very rare and is usually caused by things like hormone disorders or a disiblity that inhibits sexual feelings like Down Syndrome or severe autism. However, I am relatively normal although on the high functioning autism spectrum and am happy in my identity as an ace/aro man. However I've never met anyone like me and the only (self-professed) one I did meet was really a closet homosexual. Also, online they seem to be overwhelmingly women.
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AnonymousNoMore
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(Original post by Castor989)
Yes, it's interesting. I think it does exist but it is very rare and is usually caused by things like hormone disorders or a disiblity that inhibits sexual feelings like Down Syndrome or severe autism. However, I am relatively normal although on the high functioning autism spectrum and am happy in my identity as an ace/aro man. However I've never met anyone like me and the only (self-professed) one I did meet was really a closet homosexual. Also, online they seem to be overwhelmingly women.
I would be interested in finding out what causes it.
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Castor989
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(Original post by AnonymousNoMore)
I would be interested in finding out what causes it.
I think that Asperger's can cause it in some cases. I read a study that people with Asperger's were five or four times more likely to identify as LGBT, so I think there could be a link between AS and sexual issues/preferences.
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Em.-.
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(Original post by AnonymousNoMore)
I would be interested in finding out what causes it.
I suppose it’s basically the opposite of bisexual. It’s just like how a homosexual man feels towards a woman, but for asexuals this applies to both genders, kind of like they’re stuck in between: they don’t experience sexual attraction towards the opposite gender (like a gay person) but then don’t have sexual attraction to the same gender either. I suspect the reasons could to an extent be similar to homosexuality as both go against what would be seen as favourable in terms of reproduction. It’s different than not having a sex drive (which can be caused by things like depression), as it means the person has never been sexually attracted to a person, not simply not in the mood to have sex.

Some asexual people will have sex if they’re not repulsed by it (which some are) but they don’t feel the desire to have sex with a specific person and may only enjoy the sensation of sex (or do it to make their partner happy, which works like how gay men can have sex with women: the sensation is nice, but they’re not sexually attracted to the women).
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Anonymous #1
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Hiii, i guess this chat is finished but im aroace and i do think it has a bit to do with trauma. not necessarily anything dreadful but something that made you turn off that part of your brain.
i went to a v e r y strict christian all girls school who taught us how lesbians were wrong and sex was a sin unless married and stuff.
i think had i not been in that environment i would’ve been pansexual (with a weakness for handsome girls) but due to the environment i spent the first 13/14 years of my life in (before i was exposed to lgbt and stuff) i think my subconscious just destroyed romance and sexual things in my head - kinda like all or nothing. i couldnt just shut off the gay part of my brain so it got rid of it all...
sometimes i do long for a relationship but i only want like the platonic stuff like cuddles and jumper sharing you get from a relationship. i cant imagine romantic or sexual things.
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Tammie2345524
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Okay, asexuality could be caused by trauma in some cases, but it's quite rude to assume that there has to be a reason for me being asexual. Asexuality is a valid sexual orientation. I'm asexual. I haven't been abused or assaulted, I wasn't brought up in a religious family, I'm not a closeted homosexual or bisexual and it's not caused by mental issues.

I do have anxiety, but it's quite easy for me to tell that I just don't feel sexual attraction rather than the anxiety making me unwilling to try it. Sometimes I want to start talking to someone, but I'm too scared to. When I was 15 I went to an all-you-can-eat buffet with my family, but the thought of filling my plate while a bunch of strangers were also walking around was terrifying. I wasn't not hungry, but my anxiety meant that I wasn't going to put anything else on my plate because I was embarrassed to. I have NEVER looked at someone, strangers friend, and thought that having sex with them sounded like a good idea. I honestly thought that people pretended to like sex because surely no one actually wants to do that... right?

Asexuals who are the way they are because of life experiences or disorders do exist, but you can't assume that that's the case for every asexual. Nothing caused my asexuality, just like most heterosexuals don't have a reason for being heterosexual and most homosexuals don't have a reason for being homosexual. My sexuality is not an abnormality, I'm not broken and I don't need to be "fixed".
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