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How to get over a crush

So badically my best frind and i have know eachother fir over 2 years now, and we have had a crush on eachother when we first met but dated other people because of fear of ruining the friendship. My problem is that I have been single for around 7 months now and I like hom again. We both jokingly say were married already because we are so close and we both say that we wouldmarry the other. My problem is that i like hom more than befire and cant stop thinking aboyt him. Im scared to date him because if we were to break up i would worry it would ruin our friendship. We both show intrest but both have the same fear. Any advice on how i can get over this crush?

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Are you sure you want to get over it. I mean don’t you think you might regret not taking a chance and asking him out?
Also I don’t think he would refuse if you both have the same feelings for each other.
Also why do you think you would break up if you date him?
if you are sure you want to get over it then just take your time, talk to people and maybe try distancing yourself for a little while
if not then shoot your shot and see what happens
Reply 5
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Anonymous #1
OP
Original post by Anonymous
Also why do you think you would break up if you date him?

I know i would regret it but i would regret it more if we for whatever reason did break up. I dont think we would it just that “what if” holding us back.
Reply 6
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Anonymous #1
OP
Original post by BlackkQueen12
if you are sure you want to get over it then just take your time, talk to people and maybe try distancing yourself for a little while
if not then shoot your shot and see what happens

I would try that but i don’t have anyone else to talk too other than family. And i really do want to see where it hoes just sacred on the breakup if it were to happen
But are you okay with a life where you are not in a relationship with and are are just friends. Or do you think you would always wonder what if we where together and kinda regret the decision of just staying friends with him and not taking it further?
Don’t let what ifs hold you back in life. You may end up regretting not taking a chance. Because by the sounds of it you do want to be in a relationship with him but are just scared. Am I right?
Reply 9
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Anonymous #1
OP
Original post by Anonymous
But are you okay with a life where you are not in a relationship with and are are just friends. Or do you think you would always wonder what if we where together and kinda regret the decision of just staying friends with him and not taking it further?

Considering it has been 2 years of me and him wondering that fact i dont think we could not think about it. We have a pact that if neither of us are dating at the time we are both 21 well just marry eachother. So I think and i do hope that either way itll work ou. I just dont want to ruin what we already have. I feel as though we already are dating just not in physical way (kissing ect) but emotionally dating.
Original post by Anonymous
Don’t let what ifs hold you back in life. You may end up regretting not taking a chance. Because by the sounds of it you do want to be in a relationship with him but are just scared. Am I right?

Definitely right on that part. I just dont want to ruin what we have if thing sdidnt work out as we both think.
I feel like you value being with him so much that you are choosing to stay in a friendship with him rather than a relationship, just because you feel life friendships are stronger than relationships. That’s doesn't have to be true. A friendship can break just as a relationship can. And a relationship can be as strong as a friendship. Hope I’m not being too confusing lol.
Original post by Anonymous
I would try that but i don’t have anyone else to talk too other than family. And i really do want to see where it hoes just sacred on the breakup if it were to happen


yeah i understand that feeling, but you wont know unless you try
Original post by Anonymous
I feel like you value being with him so much that you are choosing to stay in a friendship with him rather than a relationship, just because you feel life friendships are stronger than relationships. That’s doesn't have to be true. A friendship can break just as a relationship can. And a relationship can be as strong as a friendship. Hope I’m not being too confusing lol.

No its not confusing. And i do we have been through far too much together to not be as close as we are and both value eachother allot. I just wouldent want to ruin thing if it didnt work out. I think they would but its just that “what if” sticking to me.
Original post by Anonymous
Considering it has been 2 years of me and him wondering that fact i dont think we could not think about it. We have a pact that if neither of us are dating at the time we are both 21 well just marry eachother. So I think and i do hope that either way itll work ou. I just dont want to ruin what we already have. I feel as though we already are dating just not in physical way (kissing ect) but emotionally dating.

Oh okay. But imagine he does end up dating someone. How would you feel? Wouldn’t you rather securing it with him? Also can you imagine being with someone other than him? I mean two years is a long time and you both seem to have such good understand and both like each other, so why are you both waiting to be in a relationship with someone else?
Original post by Anonymous
No its not confusing. And i do we have been through far too much together to not be as close as we are and both value eachother allot. I just wouldent want to ruin thing if it didnt work out. I think they would but its just that “what if” sticking to me.

This “what if” is irrational thinking. What if it all goes really well and you both become even happier in your stronger relationship together. I mean you really like him and are struggling to not have a crush on him. I have had crushes but my way of getting over them was by not being around them or say if it was a celebrity crush, by not searching them up. But this I your best friends. And I’m sure you wouldn’t want to avoid them.
I think you should take this risk and you guys should work together to make this work. It’s okay to argue and if you both understand eachother I don’t think there would be any problems. It sounds like you guys already have this bond and like if you choose to go out it’s your choice whether you want to take it to the next level.Idk if this would help but I was in the same situation as you five years ago I met my boyfriend and we first became friends but liked other people in the duration but then we started liking eachother and I get why your scared but I’m happy I took this risk as five years later we still happy and I don’t think I could’ve found anyone better.
Reply 17
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CJ29
5
Original post by Anonymous
Oh okay. But imagine he does end up dating someone. How would you feel? Wouldn’t you rather securing it with him? Also can you imagine being with someone other than him? I mean two years is a long time and you both seem to have such good understand and both like each other, so why are you both waiting to be in a relationship with someone else?


Were not dating purly because of the fear. He has dated a few peaple since i broke it off with someone else and eachtime i do always feel jealous and sacread that she is the one for him and not me. I dont see me being with anyone else becaude i dont know anyone else right now due to education getting f ked up. And we do know eachother better than anyone. And i suppose we are waiting because of the fear as well. The reason we didnt date when we forst met is because neither if us had the courage to confess so i suppose that is another reason now too
Reply 18
Avatar for CJ29
CJ29
5
Original post by Anonymous
I think you should take this risk and you guys should work together to make this work. It’s okay to argue and if you both understand eachother I don’t think there would be any problems. It sounds like you guys already have this bond and like if you choose to go out it’s your choice whether you want to take it to the next level.Idk if this would help but I was in the same situation as you five years ago I met my boyfriend and we first became friends but liked other people in the duration but then we started liking eachother and I get why your scared but I’m happy I took this risk as five years later we still happy and I don’t think I could’ve found anyone better.


For at of all thats great and im happy for you! And we already do have a great bond and joke that we are alreay married at this point. I feel as though we are dating already but without pysical aspects beside a hug. And at this sage i dont know anyone else other that him and family so i dont know if i can see myself with anyone else because i dont know anyone else or because i like him that much.
Wouldnt it make the friendship between you two stronger by being in a relationship?

If you want to get over him, try directly expressing to him how you feel then do other things/hobbies to keep him off your mind. (if u really want to) Maybe keep some distance from each other to allow yourself to recalculate those feelings you have for him

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