So many things have gone wrong for me during lockdown, don't know what to do
Slight disclaimer to begin with, of course I'm aware that things could be much worse right now and I am extremely grateful to have been able to remain safe and healthy during these challenging times.
I'm a final year university student and lockdown took me by surprise and messed up my routine. I spend pretty much every weekday in the uni library because I don't have a proper environment at home which enables me to have peace and quiet. Anyway, since then I haven't been able to concentrate properly and everyone at home has been driving me insane. My parents are always shouting at each other and it's like some sort of curse where in the middle of the night they scream at each other to wake me up and this has only happened on the days where I had to sit my online exams in the morning. Thank god all the exams were open book though, because I wouldn't have been able to cope otherwise.
I can't even go outside because a member of my household is shielding so I've pretty much felt like I've been in prison for the last 3 months. Staying at home, no one even tries to cooperate and give me space to study. Whether its parents bursting into my room forcing me to help them with something and bossing me around for chores that they can easily do themselves or my younger siblings making so much noise and my parents not interfering. The verbal and emotional abuse I get from my parents is what ruins my mood for the days completely though.
Some good news did come in the middle of lockdown for me though, I had been selected for an interview for my dream graduate job. But this actually did end up being a nightmare in the end since I had to prepare a report and presentation which had to be memorised and I couldn't do it to the best of my ability. When I tell you that I embarrassed myself, I really mean it. The interviewer thought I was so stupid (and I don't blame her to be fair). My house was also so noisy that I couldn't even concentrate properly during it, as well as my mum coming into the room and apparently not remembering that I had an interview that day.
I did manage to speak to my personal tutor at university post-interview(since he recommended I apply for the job as he thought I'd be the perfect fit) and he did give me a bit of reassurance, even though I ended up getting such a low score for the interview and got rejected immediately. So now I'm unemployed, which has just made things much worse and my anxiety has come back too along with the occasional panic attacks.
I literally don't know what to do. I'm only posting on here because no one in my life has any idea about what my personal life is like and there's no one I feel comfortable sharing it with. I feel like there's no plan and I have no goal. Any advice?
I'm a final year university student and lockdown took me by surprise and messed up my routine. I spend pretty much every weekday in the uni library because I don't have a proper environment at home which enables me to have peace and quiet. Anyway, since then I haven't been able to concentrate properly and everyone at home has been driving me insane. My parents are always shouting at each other and it's like some sort of curse where in the middle of the night they scream at each other to wake me up and this has only happened on the days where I had to sit my online exams in the morning. Thank god all the exams were open book though, because I wouldn't have been able to cope otherwise.
I can't even go outside because a member of my household is shielding so I've pretty much felt like I've been in prison for the last 3 months. Staying at home, no one even tries to cooperate and give me space to study. Whether its parents bursting into my room forcing me to help them with something and bossing me around for chores that they can easily do themselves or my younger siblings making so much noise and my parents not interfering. The verbal and emotional abuse I get from my parents is what ruins my mood for the days completely though.
Some good news did come in the middle of lockdown for me though, I had been selected for an interview for my dream graduate job. But this actually did end up being a nightmare in the end since I had to prepare a report and presentation which had to be memorised and I couldn't do it to the best of my ability. When I tell you that I embarrassed myself, I really mean it. The interviewer thought I was so stupid (and I don't blame her to be fair). My house was also so noisy that I couldn't even concentrate properly during it, as well as my mum coming into the room and apparently not remembering that I had an interview that day.
I did manage to speak to my personal tutor at university post-interview(since he recommended I apply for the job as he thought I'd be the perfect fit) and he did give me a bit of reassurance, even though I ended up getting such a low score for the interview and got rejected immediately. So now I'm unemployed, which has just made things much worse and my anxiety has come back too along with the occasional panic attacks.
I literally don't know what to do. I'm only posting on here because no one in my life has any idea about what my personal life is like and there's no one I feel comfortable sharing it with. I feel like there's no plan and I have no goal. Any advice?
Original post by Anonymous
Slight disclaimer to begin with, of course I'm aware that things could be much worse right now and I am extremely grateful to have been able to remain safe and healthy during these challenging times.
I'm a final year university student and lockdown took me by surprise and messed up my routine. I spend pretty much every weekday in the uni library because I don't have a proper environment at home which enables me to have peace and quiet. Anyway, since then I haven't been able to concentrate properly and everyone at home has been driving me insane. My parents are always shouting at each other and it's like some sort of curse where in the middle of the night they scream at each other to wake me up and this has only happened on the days where I had to sit my online exams in the morning. Thank god all the exams were open book though, because I wouldn't have been able to cope otherwise.
I can't even go outside because a member of my household is shielding so I've pretty much felt like I've been in prison for the last 3 months. Staying at home, no one even tries to cooperate and give me space to study. Whether its parents bursting into my room forcing me to help them with something and bossing me around for chores that they can easily do themselves or my younger siblings making so much noise and my parents not interfering. The verbal and emotional abuse I get from my parents is what ruins my mood for the days completely though.
Some good news did come in the middle of lockdown for me though, I had been selected for an interview for my dream graduate job. But this actually did end up being a nightmare in the end since I had to prepare a report and presentation which had to be memorised and I couldn't do it to the best of my ability. When I tell you that I embarrassed myself, I really mean it. The interviewer thought I was so stupid (and I don't blame her to be fair). My house was also so noisy that I couldn't even concentrate properly during it, as well as my mum coming into the room and apparently not remembering that I had an interview that day.
I did manage to speak to my personal tutor at university post-interview(since he recommended I apply for the job as he thought I'd be the perfect fit) and he did give me a bit of reassurance, even though I ended up getting such a low score for the interview and got rejected immediately. So now I'm unemployed, which has just made things much worse and my anxiety has come back too along with the occasional panic attacks.
I literally don't know what to do. I'm only posting on here because no one in my life has any idea about what my personal life is like and there's no one I feel comfortable sharing it with. I feel like there's no plan and I have no goal. Any advice?
I'm a final year university student and lockdown took me by surprise and messed up my routine. I spend pretty much every weekday in the uni library because I don't have a proper environment at home which enables me to have peace and quiet. Anyway, since then I haven't been able to concentrate properly and everyone at home has been driving me insane. My parents are always shouting at each other and it's like some sort of curse where in the middle of the night they scream at each other to wake me up and this has only happened on the days where I had to sit my online exams in the morning. Thank god all the exams were open book though, because I wouldn't have been able to cope otherwise.
I can't even go outside because a member of my household is shielding so I've pretty much felt like I've been in prison for the last 3 months. Staying at home, no one even tries to cooperate and give me space to study. Whether its parents bursting into my room forcing me to help them with something and bossing me around for chores that they can easily do themselves or my younger siblings making so much noise and my parents not interfering. The verbal and emotional abuse I get from my parents is what ruins my mood for the days completely though.
Some good news did come in the middle of lockdown for me though, I had been selected for an interview for my dream graduate job. But this actually did end up being a nightmare in the end since I had to prepare a report and presentation which had to be memorised and I couldn't do it to the best of my ability. When I tell you that I embarrassed myself, I really mean it. The interviewer thought I was so stupid (and I don't blame her to be fair). My house was also so noisy that I couldn't even concentrate properly during it, as well as my mum coming into the room and apparently not remembering that I had an interview that day.
I did manage to speak to my personal tutor at university post-interview(since he recommended I apply for the job as he thought I'd be the perfect fit) and he did give me a bit of reassurance, even though I ended up getting such a low score for the interview and got rejected immediately. So now I'm unemployed, which has just made things much worse and my anxiety has come back too along with the occasional panic attacks.
I literally don't know what to do. I'm only posting on here because no one in my life has any idea about what my personal life is like and there's no one I feel comfortable sharing it with. I feel like there's no plan and I have no goal. Any advice?
How old are you ? If your 18 and over , you could perhaps call a friend and ask if you could stay over- places r opening up and lots of ppl need jobs, so you could apply to any of those jobs ( cafes, deliveries etc).
Dont give up so quickly and feel down because of ur environment, everyone is going through something similar at this point and u'll get through this.
Focus on one thing at a time, and remember that there will always be a new opportunity. If u didnt get the interview, then theres a reason and something new will come up.
If you need to talk to someone during the day , i recommend 7cups app, its free and u can find listeners/therapist but they will mostly listen, as they cannot give much advice.
I got help from there last year when i was alone without much support and it truly helped.
goodluck
You need to make a plan for after lockdown and then have a few backup plans.
For now though, set a schedule and stick it in your room, on your door ans in the kitchen on the fridge. Include time you will spend doing chores, time you will spend to play with your siblings, time with parents even with the way they are and time studying/applying for job etc. Space it all out in the day so that you've got chores 3 or 4 times a day and study 3 or 4 times a day. Now tell everyone that the times you spend studying is yours alone and no one comes in your room then. Tell the siblings to be a tad bit quieter, suggest quiet things they can do and supply them with the things they might need for that. Tell your parents what time you will be spending with them and doing chores etc.
Now have a sign that will stop anyone entering your room when you study which you will put up when you study eg. A colourful hat on the door handle
For now though, set a schedule and stick it in your room, on your door ans in the kitchen on the fridge. Include time you will spend doing chores, time you will spend to play with your siblings, time with parents even with the way they are and time studying/applying for job etc. Space it all out in the day so that you've got chores 3 or 4 times a day and study 3 or 4 times a day. Now tell everyone that the times you spend studying is yours alone and no one comes in your room then. Tell the siblings to be a tad bit quieter, suggest quiet things they can do and supply them with the things they might need for that. Tell your parents what time you will be spending with them and doing chores etc.
Now have a sign that will stop anyone entering your room when you study which you will put up when you study eg. A colourful hat on the door handle
Original post by Anonymous
How old are you ? If your 18 and over , you could perhaps call a friend and ask if you could stay over- places r opening up and lots of ppl need jobs, so you could apply to any of those jobs ( cafes, deliveries etc).
Dont give up so quickly and feel down because of ur environment, everyone is going through something similar at this point and u'll get through this.
Focus on one thing at a time, and remember that there will always be a new opportunity. If u didnt get the interview, then theres a reason and something new will come up.
If you need to talk to someone during the day , i recommend 7cups app, its free and u can find listeners/therapist but they will mostly listen, as they cannot give much advice.
I got help from there last year when i was alone without much support and it truly helped.
goodluck
Dont give up so quickly and feel down because of ur environment, everyone is going through something similar at this point and u'll get through this.
Focus on one thing at a time, and remember that there will always be a new opportunity. If u didnt get the interview, then theres a reason and something new will come up.
If you need to talk to someone during the day , i recommend 7cups app, its free and u can find listeners/therapist but they will mostly listen, as they cannot give much advice.
I got help from there last year when i was alone without much support and it truly helped.
goodluck
I did mention that I'm a final year university student, so I'm obviously over 18. Thanks for the recommendations on the jobs but not to sound arrogant, I just finished university (and quite a respectable one too) in an academic subject, which is why none of them are really for me I'm afraid.
Thanks for recommending the app, I'll check it out.
I should have really mentioned this more directly in the original post, my mistake, but I just finished my exams so there's kind of no point of doing this now. And trust me, I did try do something similar to this during exams and it didn't work in my household at all 
. My parents just burst into my room whenever they felt like it and assumed I'm not studying and wasting time.
Thanks for taking the time to reply though.
. My parents just burst into my room whenever they felt like it and assumed I'm not studying and wasting time. Thanks for taking the time to reply though.
Original post by Anonymous
I should have really mentioned this more directly in the original post, my mistake, but I just finished my exams so there's kind of no point of doing this now. And trust me, I did try do something similar to this during exams and it didn't work in my household at all . My parents just burst into my room whenever they felt like it and assumed I'm not studying and wasting time.
Thanks for taking the time to reply though.
. My parents just burst into my room whenever they felt like it and assumed I'm not studying and wasting time. Thanks for taking the time to reply though.
I'm not being rude but just because you have finished university in an academic subject doesn't mean you shouldn't apply to retail jobs. A lot of people are in the same boat as you just now and a lot of people have been made redundant. I bet they're extremely qualified but they have no choice but to apply to be a delivery driver/work behind a till. So maybe this is something you should consider as a full time job so that way you're maintaining your sanity and you get to be out of the house a little bit. If you have money coming in you can at least find yourself a small place to live away from your parents and this way you'll have a better chance of getting a job in your field. None of this is going to happen overnight and you'll need to start from the bottom I'm afraid.
