Traditional Asian household dating outside race

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Anonymous #1
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Report Thread starter 7 months ago
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Hi guys so i’m a Sikh guy and for whatever reason just can’t find another Sikh girl for the life of me. So I have decided to start trying dating other girls who are not asian and it has turned out to be much much more successful.

But I do come from a traditional asian family and I am worried about how they will react if I don’t have another Sikh girlfriend. Has anyone else been in the situation and how did your family react to the situation?
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Hoc est Bellum
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Hi guys so i’m a Sikh guy and for whatever reason just can’t find another Sikh girl for the life of me. So I have decided to start trying dating other girls who are not asian and it has turned out to be much much more successful.

But I do come from a traditional asian family and I am worried about how they will react if I don’t have another Sikh girlfriend. Has anyone else been in the situation and how did your family react to the situation?
Marriage as a Sikh with another outside your religion is okay so long as you marry outside of Guardwa. They may not be too happy but am sure they will respect your situation and therefore your choice in partner. You know your parents more than I do so I assume you can make a good guess of there reaction.
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Cheesybread
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Depends on your family, probe them, see how religious they are, my sister dated a white boy they were ok with it not that happy, and she knew that if the relationship turned serious she would not be close to the rest of her family. This would lead to me and our parents not being as close to him, however you family may be more/less accepting.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Cheesybread)
Depends on your family, probe them, see how religious they are, my sister dated a white boy they were ok with it not that happy, and she knew that if the relationship turned serious she would not be close to the rest of her family. This would lead to me and our parents not being as close to him, however you family may be more/less accepting.
I feel like they would be the same as that unfortunately, but I just have no luck with Sikh girls. It feels like everything I say and everything I do has to be perfect and 1 mistake or 1 slightly less entertaining message and they just ignore you. But this hasn’t been the case for girls of other races, they just seem a lot easier to talk too and I don’t feel like I need to impress them 24/7.
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asif007
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I get where you’re coming from. Punjabi girls these days do have really high standards and if you’re not a super high-flying businessman making 7 figures and driving muscle cars, they want nothing to do with you. Sad but true. Probably because they’ve been listening to too much sadde apne Moose Wala te Karan Aujla de gaane. Who can blame them, those guys are legends and must be rolling in girls. But lots of ordinary girls these days consider themselves worthy of pulling a rich man even if the girl isn’t as fit as she thinks she is. That too without putting any effort in - they want the man to approach, initiate everything and shower her with gifts just so she can play games later on.

Tbh I think it’s a good thing you’re having better luck dating outside your race. White girls for example are usually not as receptive to dating South Asian guys who take part in the culture. Drinking alcohol is usually the only thing we have in common with them, and not all of us even do that.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by asif007)
I get where you’re coming from. Punjabi girls these days do have really high standards and if you’re not a super high-flying businessman making 7 figures and driving muscle cars, they want nothing to do with you. Sad but true. Probably because they’ve been listening to too much sadde apne Moose Wala te Karan Aujla de gaane. Who can blame them, those guys are legends and must be rolling in girls. But lots of ordinary girls these days consider themselves worthy of pulling a rich man even if the girl isn’t as fit as she thinks she is. That too without putting any effort in - they want the man to approach, initiate everything and shower her with gifts just so she can play games later on.

Tbh I think it’s a good thing you’re having better luck dating outside your race. White girls for example are usually not as receptive to dating South Asian guys who take part in the culture. Drinking alcohol is usually the only thing we have in common with them, and not all of us even do that.
Yeah bro you have put my thoughts in writing, but for me it’s been easier with girls of other races. Idk maybe i’m just more attractive to them i’m not sure. But honestly they just seem a lot easier to talk too from my experience even if we have less in common
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asif007
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Yeah bro you have put my thoughts in writing, but for me it’s been easier with girls of other races. Idk maybe i’m just more attractive to them i’m not sure. But honestly they just seem a lot easier to talk too from my experience even if we have less in common
Are you dating/have you dated a non-Asian girl? I agree that white girls for example are easy to talk to but sustaining their interest in you is a lot harder if you have less in common with them. Some girls are friendly and do reply to messages and you can talk to them on a superficial level and it might seem like they’re interested. But be careful you’re not mistaking signs of affection for the friend zone. I think British Asian guys have better luck with non-Asian girls when they don’t take part in Asian culture.
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londonmyst
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I have lots of sikh friends and have dated punjabi guys who grew up in England, Scotland, India and the usa.
It depends how traditionalist & religious, whether parents are willing to accept change affecting future generations and if there is a history of hereditary illness or violence within the family.
But if your family are violent, very caste conscious, religious vegetarians, vociferously hostile towards alcohol, have a tradition of arranged marriages within the family or support khalistan- don't take the risk of letting them know about your private life.

Plenty of friends have dated or married people of other caste, racial and religious backgrounds.
I know many sikh families who are supportive of interfaith relationships and happy to welcome partners of all castes, nationalities and religious beliefs.
Often families with a history of health problems are the most open minded about young relations dating and choosing interfaith marriage with people of very different backgrounds.

But I also volunteer with charities supporting the survivors of rape, forced marriage and honour abuse.
I've supported many people whose traditionalist families discovered their friendships or romantic relationship with people of other caste, religious or racial backgrounds that disinherited them or turned violent.
Plenty of survivors whose relatives disowned them then mounted a vicious hate campaign based on vitriol and lies but no violence too.
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manishakaur00
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Hi guys so i’m a Sikh guy and for whatever reason just can’t find another Sikh girl for the life of me. So I have decided to start trying dating other girls who are not asian and it has turned out to be much much more successful.

But I do come from a traditional asian family and I am worried about how they will react if I don’t have another Sikh girlfriend. Has anyone else been in the situation and how did your family react to the situation?
Recently a friend of mine who has a family of Amritdhari background was been kicked out of his house because he chose to pursue a non sikh girl, he knew of the consequences but still wanted to go through with it, he now lives with her and her family until they can get on their own feet. He's just turned 20 years old.

It honestly depends on your family though and what they think, you should talk to them perhaps? I know its not easy, but it'll help get an understanding.
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TJ1997
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Hi guys so i’m a Sikh guy and for whatever reason just can’t find another Sikh girl for the life of me. So I have decided to start trying dating other girls who are not asian and it has turned out to be much much more successful.

But I do come from a traditional asian family and I am worried about how they will react if I don’t have another Sikh girlfriend. Has anyone else been in the situation and how did your family react to the situation?
My family aren't traditional, but I generally prefer non Asian girls now too; haven't really got on with Sikh girls too much but the ones I did usually went for white guys..
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by manishakaur00)
Recently a friend of mine who has a family of Amritdhari background was been kicked out of his house because he chose to pursue a non sikh girl, he knew of the consequences but still wanted to go through with it, he now lives with her and her family until they can get on their own feet. He's just turned 20 years old.

It honestly depends on your family though and what they think, you should talk to them perhaps? I know its not easy, but it'll help get an understanding.
That is a big risk to take at 20 considering statistically they wont last long.
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Yeah bro you have put my thoughts in writing, but for me it’s been easier with girls of other races. Idk maybe i’m just more attractive to them i’m not sure. But honestly they just seem a lot easier to talk too from my experience even if we have less in common
I think some of these sikh girls can appear stuck up who knows as not really spoken to that many. Are they expected to get married to sikh guys ?

Defo have been out alot more with others such as white, muslim, european and a few others.

As to how your family would react you would have an idea as you know them better.
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manishakaur00
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(Original post by Anonymous)
That is a big risk to take at 20 considering statistically they wont last long.
To make it more risky, he's known her for a year i think :/ But she's really controlling, I think he's stuck now.
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Anonymous #3
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Tbh as an Asian, unless you are really good looking or popular it's harder to date white girls or other races like hispanic, etc
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asif007
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Tbh as an Asian, unless you are really good looking or popular it's harder to date white girls or other races like hispanic, etc
I agree with this but I think it’s a problem with Asian girls too. They want us guys to look like Indian film actors or we pretty much don’t have a chance with them. Most normal guys don’t meet those kinds of high standards.
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