Turn on thread page Beta
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    I know this is really common but I really don't know what to try.

    I've been sleeping with my boyfriend for a few months and it is often really painful. It is sometimes fantastic but I have never orgasmed from it.

    We tried using lube - got the durex 'play' stuff, but it just burned! This, plus probably having too much sex when I was a bit dry led to me getting really really bad cystitis (where it burns when you pee) and I had to get antibiotics and everything. It's made me really depressed about having sex in general now.

    I really want to enjoy it properly, any advice??
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Hmmmm.
    The way it's gone for you so far I'm willing to bet that by the time you get to sex your fully aware that it might hurt and be worrying again and not just enjoying it, yes?

    So it's really annoying to say but the more you relax the easier is should be, the more you focus on something that more difficult it gets.
    Some of the durex play stuff can give some odd sensations, perhaps try a non tingle lube if you feel you need one.

    Maybe you should have a bit more foreplay, your fully in the mood, not rushed, no stress, just enjoy it. Then if you've already had lots of fun prior to sex it might take the pressure off durning sex.

    As for the never orgasming all I can say is try and try again.
    Different positions and angles work wonders, pillows can help prop you up 'n' stuff.
    When I was with my first boyfriend we'd been sexually active for urhm... I'd say about 8 months before it happened for me.

    So yeah, relax, don't worry about it, start of slow and build up with other fun activites ;D


    Good luck! [& have fun of course]
    x
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Well said, x_zombie.
    • #2
    #2

    I have the same problem OP. It varies, sometimes sex is fine, only painful when he enters me then its alright, no pain, but other times its unbearable. I find its much better when im distracted when he enters me, since im not worrying its going to hurt, and also lots and lots of foreplay.

    I've only come from sex once, but I still really enjoy sex, seeing my boyfriend come makes me far happier than coming myself, though we've found a new position which i reckon i could come in, so experiment and try different positions, its amazing what a difference they make.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    sex used to hurt me for ages, i thought it was only meant to hurt the first few times.. but it hurt for months. after doing it a lot it gradually stopped hurting, although if i go quite a while without it now it hurts the first few times again! maybe i'm just weird?! but anyway what i'm saying is it's probably best to just keep trying at it.
    • #3
    #3

    Please keep anon.

    Don't buy the Durex 'play' or 'tingle' ones - just buy their normal lube (they say it's also massage gel). It doesn't sting or tingle at all and it really helps with the pain. Also make sure he goes slowly so that you can control how much it's hurting (at least to begin with). Have you discussed this with him?
    Don't worry, this happened to me and after a while the pain just went away. It still hurts occasionally but not nearly as much.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Please keep anon.

    Don't buy the Durex 'play' or 'tingle' ones - just buy their normal lube (they say it's also massage gel). It doesn't sting or tingle at all and it really helps with the pain. Also make sure he goes slowly so that you can control how much it's hurting (at least to begin with). Have you discussed this with him?
    Don't worry, this happened to me and after a while the pain just went away. It still hurts occasionally but not nearly as much.
    Is that the blue stuff in the big round bottle? Just checking as I'm scared of getting another one that has such a bad effect!

    Yeah we have talked about it, he feels really bad that it hurts me and wants to make it better, but don't know what to try. We've tried going slowly and pillows etc which definitely helped though.
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
Turn on thread page Beta
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: August 29, 2008
Poll
Black Friday: Yay or Nay?

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.