Anyone else just tired?

Watch
Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 5 days ago
#1
Trigger warning - mention of a previous suicide attempt


Spoiler:
Show
I can’t get a job. I’ve been looking since the start of year 12 and I just finished year 13 now. My dog, who we’ve had for 10 years since I was 8, has jut had to be put down because she had cancer and it spread (because the vets wouldn’t see her due to them not being open because of Covid) The boy I like (a lot) doesn’t care about me at all, I got rejected from every single one of my uni choices this year (for medicine). I didn’t even make it to interview. I feel like i haven’t managed to get the grades I need (predicted because yay, exams were cancelled ) My mum is a ***** and my mental health has deteriorated so much that I’ve had panic attacks and have been in crisis. My friend who I usually talk to about this stuff lives 5 hours away and is going through their own **** so they aren’t able to support me. I just feel like everything is falling the **** apart and I don’t know why I give a crap about life anymore. Before anyone panics, I’m not suicidal. I promise you that. I have been suicidal 3 times in the past 3 years, but each time I crawl my way back up and get on with life. I will not allow myself to get that low again, I won’t. But it’s just so ****ing hard and I feel like crap. It’s like everything in my life is just going wrong and all I’m asking for is just for one thing, one f-ing thing to go right. Give me a job. Or somehow make the boy I like, like me back. Just give me something. Seriously God, if you exist you suck. You really do. I know other people have it worse and everyone is going through awful stuff because of this virus and this lockdown, but Jesus. All my friends can get jobs. All my friends got into uni. I just need something to go ok. Just something. I’m just tired. I’m so tired of trying so hard when it seems like things just get handed over to other people. I’m not saying my fiends haven’t worked hard or they don’t deserve. But I can’t even get a job ANYWHERE, I’ve never dated, a everyone j care about just leaves me and I’m not good enough to get into uni. I’m just so tired.
0
reply
DrawTheLine
Badges: 22
Rep:
?
#2
Report 5 days ago
#2
(Original post by Anonymous)
Trigger warning - mention of a previous suicide attempt


Spoiler:
Show
I can’t get a job. I’ve been looking since the start of year 12 and I just finished year 13 now. My dog, who we’ve had for 10 years since I was 8, has jut had to be put down because she had cancer and it spread (because the vets wouldn’t see her due to them not being open because of Covid) The boy I like (a lot) doesn’t care about me at all, I got rejected from every single one of my uni choices this year (for medicine). I didn’t even make it to interview. I feel like i haven’t managed to get the grades I need (predicted because yay, exams were cancelled ) My mum is a ***** and my mental health has deteriorated so much that I’ve had panic attacks and have been in crisis. My friend who I usually talk to about this stuff lives 5 hours away and is going through their own **** so they aren’t able to support me. I just feel like everything is falling the **** apart and I don’t know why I give a crap about life anymore. Before anyone panics, I’m not suicidal. I promise you that. I have been suicidal 3 times in the past 3 years, but each time I crawl my way back up and get on with life. I will not allow myself to get that low again, I won’t. But it’s just so ****ing hard and I feel like crap. It’s like everything in my life is just going wrong and all I’m asking for is just for one thing, one f-ing thing to go right. Give me a job. Or somehow make the boy I like, like me back. Just give me something. Seriously God, if you exist you suck. You really do. I know other people have it worse and everyone is going through awful stuff because of this virus and this lockdown, but Jesus. All my friends can get jobs. All my friends got into uni. I just need something to go ok. Just something. I’m just tired. I’m so tired of trying so hard when it seems like things just get handed over to other people. I’m not saying my fiends haven’t worked hard or they don’t deserve. But I can’t even get a job ANYWHERE, I’ve never dated, a everyone j care about just leaves me and I’m not good enough to get into uni. I’m just so tired.
I'm really sorry you're going through this. I completely understand your frustration, and it's really good that you've gotten it all out of your system here. I hope you feel a little bit better for just having this vent. I'm not sure if I can offer any helpful advice, but I will say one thing. This is just a bump in the road that is your life. You have decades ahead of you, and it won't all be like this. Jobs will become available and you will get one, you'll meet other guys who will be head over heels for you, and you will get the career that you want. Eventually. Life doesn't have to have a strict timeline. You aren't falling behind in life because everyone does things differently, so you're perfectly fine. It sounds a bit cringey, but when I feel how you do I tell myself "this too shall pass". Because it will. It's only a short chapter of your life which kinda sucks right now, but this chapter will end and a new, better, happier chapter will begin. The sucky part is that we don't know when that good chapter will begin, but we just sort of have to power through until we get to it. You can do it. The world right now really sucks and nothing is going to plan for anyone, so you definitely aren't alone. Try to keep your chin up and remember that this will pass.
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#3
Report Thread starter 5 days ago
#3
(Original post by DrawTheLine)
I'm really sorry you're going through this. I completely understand your frustration, and it's really good that you've gotten it all out of your system here. I hope you feel a little bit better for just having this vent. I'm not sure if I can offer any helpful advice, but I will say one thing. This is just a bump in the road that is your life. You have decades ahead of you, and it won't all be like this. Jobs will become available and you will get one, you'll meet other guys who will be head over heels for you, and you will get the career that you want. Eventually. Life doesn't have to have a strict timeline. You aren't falling behind in life because everyone does things differently, so you're perfectly fine. It sounds a bit cringey, but when I feel how you do I tell myself "this too shall pass". Because it will. It's only a short chapter of your life which kinda sucks right now, but this chapter will end and a new, better, happier chapter will begin. The sucky part is that we don't know when that good chapter will begin, but we just sort of have to power through until we get to it. You can do it. The world right now really sucks and nothing is going to plan for anyone, so you definitely aren't alone. Try to keep your chin up and remember that this will pass.
Thank you. I do feel a little better I guess but I know this is going to be a hard few days at least. That’s what I tell myself to, that it will pass and it always does. It’s just something else happens and knocks me back down again. I’m just getting really tired and now I’m just thinking that I’ve been knocked down again, I might as well just stay down. I try to get myself up again and work through things. I try and apply for more jobs, I try and stay positive, I try to forget about that guy but it just doesn’t ever work out. I just feel so rushed and (I know it sounds dramatic and maybe insensitive) like my life is already kind of over at 18. Like if we were born with energy bars or batteries, mine is about to run out and I don’t know if I can charge it again. That’s what it feel like. Like my battery is running out and I just don’t have the energy anymore.
0
reply
X

Quick Reply

Attached files
Write a reply...
Reply
new posts
Back
to top
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

How are you finding researching unis for 2021 entry?

I have been able to get all the information I need from online research (63)
19.27%
I have tried virtual events and found them useful (70)
21.41%
I have tried virtual events and did not find them useful (61)
18.65%
I would be interested in trying socially distanced or scaled down in person events (69)
21.1%
I want to but don't know where to start with researching unis for 2021 entry (32)
9.79%
I haven't started researching yet (32)
9.79%

Watched Threads

View All