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    I was pulled over by a policeman the other day. He told me to blow into a bag. I asked him why, and he said "My chips are too hot."
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    why didn't madeline mccann go the world premiere of the new transformers film?

    because she's dead.
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    I had a dream I was turning into an airport, so I went to the Doctor.

    He asked if it was terminal.
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    I was out walking in the countryside with my friend. I point to a large rock in the distance and say 'Wow, that's a big rock.'

    He says 'Boulder'.

    I say 'WOW, THAT'S A BIG ROCK!'
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    Why is Gary Glitter like Santa Claus?

    They both like emptying their sacks in children's bedrooms
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    Who's black and a murderer?

    Darth Vader.


    What is wet humour?

    Someone stepping in a giant puddle without wellies.
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    What did the person say when they saw a scantily clad disk?

    'Oooh, Thats a bit CD'
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    im from near wigan
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    near wigan but not wigan
 
 
 
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